Hey look, a giant sign telling you to find a different job

They can't afford to check their grammar. You think they can afford to give their employees benefits? You expect the poor CEO to take a pay cut to pay for all of this? You'll just have to go to poor Timmy Executive and tell him he's not getting that second yacht for Christmas this year.

Spring for the spell check function for management.

Yes, except "hire enough people". You can't staff enough to cover 4 out of 8 employees off from a combination of sick, bereavement, and vacation.

It happens. All you can do is prioritize tasks, make it work the best you can with the resources you have, and manage expectations.

If the work can't be rescheduled, and isn't worth paying someone OT to cover, well, then, it's not worth doing.

Also have some professionalism and make sure your management knows how to spell

Maybe she sincerely means 'million dollar company', a company too dirt poor to pay to have adequate coverage...

clears throat Don't you think we should ask for more than a million dollars? A million dollars isn't exactly a lot of money these days. Virtucon alone makes over 9 billion dollars a year!

I've worked with Fortune 100 companies that were total Mickey Mouse outfits.

I got sued by a big supplier over literally nothing, after I had refused to honor an illegal clause in a contract (which literally would have put me out of business, so it was a serious issue). They couldn't sue me for that, so they claimed I hadn't returned some rented equipment, which was a lie. But they said that I better pay up ($10K), because who did I think the judge was going to believe, some loser (their lawyer's word), or a Fortune 500 company? I didn't say it, but in MY county, I doubted the judge was going to favor the big corporation.

When we got to court, I had my lawyer ask me about my new supplier's inventory control system, and explained how the new system had bar codes, and every piece of gear is carefully tracked. The company that was suing me, couldn't even tell the court how many they had in stock, how many they rented out, etc.

The judge looked at the Plaintiffs, and said, "This is the most amateurish inventory control system I've ever seen. I don't understand how you got to be a Fortune 500 company by doing business this way. You expect me to tell this man to pay you $10,000, when you don't even know if the equipment is actually missing?"

She found for me, AND made them pay my legal fees. After two years of worry, it was one of the most satisfying days of my life.

They are a singular million, sad face

Jennifer B Winston will not negotiate with terrorists

Don't forget your coworkers you'd be exposing to your illness as well.

Right? I work for an actual megacorp and our policy is almost the exact opposite on every point.
Sick workers make more sick: don't work and feel better faster. Distracted workers makes mistakes and cause problems: don't work and take care of your kid. Rested workers work better: take the time around the holidays off entirely. Productivity is crap then anyway and with so many vacations it's easier to plan around a block where nothing happens than to deal with random teams having unpredictable delays. Car broken? Expense a Lyft. We have a corporate account and your ride to work is a rounding error compared to the sales visits.

If you're going to invoke money you should actually understand how big companies function and view money.

This

Lets, let's, we an million doller compny. Us acts like 1.

I worked in a service center for a big company back in my 20's, they would factor in callouts to their staffing plan, and use historical data for it. They also paid 2.5x time on holidays like the 25/26 December. That's what a million dollar company should look like...if you want to make sure there's coverage, you pay for it.

For a good time, for a good time call

So what is that number really?

Wait a minute...

How many people use that as the MS bitlocker password....lol

I got it!

Never mind that surely a big company doesn't explode the second someone calls in sick. The whole sign makes no sense at all.

I'd say it's a lukewarm take at best. A million dollar company is something like a small (<10 people) consulting agency or a couple hot dog stands in a relatively busy area. So like you said, nothing exceptional.

Leaving out self-employed individuals and 2-3 person hair salons and the like, a million dollar revenue is not really something difficult to reach. Especially if you include things like retail, where moving any inventory increases revenue a lot. Even for companies outside retail, when keeping in mind how much one is able to bill for things like trades in the US, revenue increases quite quickly.

A Horrible Boss you would say.

Yeah, I took it as it's a barely functional company that's being held together by hopes and dreams. The food vendors at my local state fair do millions in sales in just a few weekends. Per Wikipedia, Sweet Martha's Cookies in 2023 made $4.6 million in 12 days.

20 employees = 3-4 employees + 1 owner/CEO whose wife needs fake tits and many vacations, but yes otherwise

“Then they’ll be our aides!”

I dunno. $1M sounds like a really small company….

Seems no one noticed lets should be let's, as in let us.

Which America out of the two?

I was wondering the same thing. Maybe referring to a specific sickness a person has?

But more likely just skipped English class.

Everybody hates Jenny, she's a removed.

How many want Americans though?

That's probably why they're desperate for no call offs. In this day a million dollar company still feels like it's constantly on the edge of collapse. No pity for jenny though, if you can't manage around your workforce taking time off during the holidays that's bad management.

I get the sick child thing, though. I used to own a retail shop, and one girl would check the schedule, and if I was off, she'd call in sick, knowing I could cover her shift. This was pissing me off, because I only took Sundays off, so every time she did that, I'd have to go 2 weeks without a break, and then she'd do it next weekend, too.

Often her sick daughter was the excuse. Her husband was chronically unemployed ( he never had a job the entire time I knew her, while she worked two jobs), and I finally said "No, have your husband watch her, he doesn't have anything else to do."

And that's when she said one of the most outrageous things I've heard: "He doesn't like taking care of her, because she's a girl, and Hispanic men don't like taking care of girls."

I lost it. "You mean that because you have this communication problem with your loser husband, I have to be the solution? My Sundays are my time to spend with MY kid, but I can't do it because YOUR useless husband doesn't want to be bothered with spending time with HIS kid? Your problems are your problems, and they are not mine to fix. Stop making your problems my problems. I expect you to get to work today, or don't come back."

She did end up quitting not long after, and then called me up months later when she needed money, and begged for work. She had experience, so I gave her another chance. Then she got pissed because after being gone for a year, everyone else was making more money, so she demanded the same pay, and then demanded more, because she wanted the Assistant Manager position that she claimed I offered her before she quit (I had never done that, I would never have given her control of the shop), which was already held by someone competent, who still works for me to this day.

Also increases recovery time further decreasing productivity

One of them ain't much of a person

Yes your sick. If your sick is sick buy it some medicine

yeah, I've been with my current company as we've grown from like a million dollars in sales to 20 times that

at a million dollars in sales, it was like five of us doing everything and we all worked so much to get it all done and build things to grow as time went on. so while I think this is opposite of what Jenny is trying to convey, a million dollar company would likely require no callouts at critical times.

now, two points:

1. that doesn't make it ok. in my situation, we all enjoyed it and we're compensated for it. that's why it worked.
2. a multi-million dollar company, with like 50+ employees, that's I think what Jenny is trying to get at, real "big company" shit — in which case, a proper company such as that can handle a few callouts, else they are by definition not a company with their shit together

edit: also this is almost definitely retail so like yeah fuck Jenny, if somebody is sick, they're sick. maybe close the store on Christmas if this is always an issue because you're not paying people enough to be there

I once suffered a horrible wretch for an HR manager for ~5 years. When she finally got shitcanned, people were literally skipping through the halls in the engineering wing singing "ding dong! the witch is dead!"

I'm trying really hard to remember her first name, but I think my psyche has blocked it. Same vibes, though.

edit: and the name randomly just came back to me with a flash of horror: Jody

You're thinking Guillotine, not gallows, if you're lighting a weight off their shoulders.

Why did we even have a pandemic? Can’t you assholes just buy some medicine?

Nah, you're thinking of a hundred-plus-million dollar company. Being understaffed and disastrously managed is about right for a million dollar company.

Reading this as an ETL speaker, it gives me second hand embarrassment.

Fuckin Jenny

Probably from Reddit. You'd need to look there

Edit: reverse looked up the image. this is a repost over 3 years old. Good luck

This. Don't forget about the evil that is HR. I was making good money with a nice career path in that field, but I had to quit because I couldn't handle how they made me treat people. All my coworkers? Absolute robots. They hid behind the "I'm just doing my job" excuse and couldn't identify right or wrong, just passed the orders down without sympathy. We had one guy that they couldn't control with strong connections so they couldn't fire him, and he really fought for his employees. They verbally tore him apart every day until he couldn't handle it anymore.

Could be 10 people making 50k a year in a shed with a couple of managers making more. Whether that's a just a warehouse or actually making widgets or some such that's easily a profitable business with a million or so in revenue. Or just a small shop with a handful of minimum wage employees. Maybe an office cleaning service? Some business models can be perfectly stable with a million or so per year in revenue