Hey look, a giant sign telling you to find a different job
Hey look, a giant sign telling you to find a different job

It amazes me that people who can't distinguish between 'your' and 'you're' are allowed to manage people
Hey look, a giant sign telling you to find a different job

It amazes me that people who can't distinguish between 'your' and 'you're' are allowed to manage people
So, act like a million 💸 company and cover your employees' babysitting and taxi expenses. Also hire enough people.
They can't afford to check their grammar. You think they can afford to give their employees benefits? You expect the poor CEO to take a pay cut to pay for all of this? You'll just have to go to poor Timmy Executive and tell him he's not getting that second yacht for Christmas this year.
Spring for the spell check function for management.
Wouldn't do much good in this case - "your" and "lets" are actual words.
Yes, except "hire enough people". You can't staff enough to cover 4 out of 8 employees off from a combination of sick, bereavement, and vacation.
It happens. All you can do is prioritize tasks, make it work the best you can with the resources you have, and manage expectations.
If the work can't be rescheduled, and isn't worth paying someone OT to cover, well, then, it's not worth doing.
Also have some professionalism and make sure your management knows how to spell
Maybe she sincerely means 'million dollar company', a company too dirt poor to pay to have adequate coverage...
clears throat Don't you think we should ask for more than a million dollars? A million dollars isn't exactly a lot of money these days. Virtucon alone makes over 9 billion dollars a year!
Hire enough staff that a few missing makes no difference to operations.
You're a million dollar company. Act like it.
Also, pretty sure my company got sold for a lot more than that and we're amateur as fuck.
I've worked with Fortune 100 companies that were total Mickey Mouse outfits.
I got sued by a big supplier over literally nothing, after I had refused to honor an illegal clause in a contract (which literally would have put me out of business, so it was a serious issue). They couldn't sue me for that, so they claimed I hadn't returned some rented equipment, which was a lie. But they said that I better pay up ($10K), because who did I think the judge was going to believe, some loser (their lawyer's word), or a Fortune 500 company? I didn't say it, but in MY county, I doubted the judge was going to favor the big corporation.
When we got to court, I had my lawyer ask me about my new supplier's inventory control system, and explained how the new system had bar codes, and every piece of gear is carefully tracked. The company that was suing me, couldn't even tell the court how many they had in stock, how many they rented out, etc.
The judge looked at the Plaintiffs, and said, "This is the most amateurish inventory control system I've ever seen. I don't understand how you got to be a Fortune 500 company by doing business this way. You expect me to tell this man to pay you $10,000, when you don't even know if the equipment is actually missing?"
She found for me, AND made them pay my legal fees. After two years of worry, it was one of the most satisfying days of my life.
She found for me, AND made them pay my legal fees. After two years of worry, it was one of the most satisfying days of my life.
This is great, but at the end of the day, they still harassed you with their bs lawsuit, and they still gave you 2 years of stress. Justice would be them getting counter-sued and you getting compensation for psychological trauma. (even though you will never get your health back 100% from a process like that.)
Thanks for sharing 😆 10/10 very satisfying
Fuck yeah, congrats.
in MY county
Howd you manage that? Any company worth a shit had a clause that all cases be held where they decide, typically where theyre head quartered
They are a singular million, sad face
Jennifer B Winston will not negotiate with terrorists
I am not a million dollar company I am a wage slave that gets treated like a disposable sack of shit by said Million Dollar Company. And I won’t be sacrificing my or my family’s health for their benefit.
Don't forget your coworkers you'd be exposing to your illness as well.
Well I might cough on Jenny. She seems to need a reality check.
We are a million-dollar company. Let's act like one.
Okay so that means you'll schedule several people to be on-call, right?
Right? I work for an actual megacorp and our policy is almost the exact opposite on every point.
Sick workers make more sick: don't work and feel better faster. Distracted workers makes mistakes and cause problems: don't work and take care of your kid. Rested workers work better: take the time around the holidays off entirely. Productivity is crap then anyway and with so many vacations it's easier to plan around a block where nothing happens than to deal with random teams having unpredictable delays. Car broken? Expense a Lyft. We have a corporate account and your ride to work is a rounding error compared to the sales visits.
If you're going to invoke money you should actually understand how big companies function and view money.
We have so many tickets open with third party companies that almost certainly won't get resolved until the new year that there's no point worrying about our productivity.
This
Your sick --> You're. Let's act like a million dollar company, mmmk?
Lets, let's, we an million doller compny. Us acts like 1.
We had a guy call in one day saying he couldn’t make it as he was having car problems. Boss says he didn’t even know he had a car. Guy replies: I don’t. That’s the problem.
"we are a million dollar company, you have no choice but to come in and make your $90 on this day"
Ya ok. If we are a million dollar company then where's my share?
Fuck that mentality.
I worked in a service center for a big company back in my 20's, they would factor in callouts to their staffing plan, and use historical data for it. They also paid 2.5x time on holidays like the 25/26 December. That's what a million dollar company should look like...if you want to make sure there's coverage, you pay for it.
A million dollar company is relatively a small fry. That's what an average auto repair shop can make in a year in revenue. Small companies are way more likely to break labor laws and treat their employees like shit.
If anyone wants to call and complain her number is 8675309.
For a good time, for a good time call
So what is that number really?
Jenny's number.
It was found on a bathroom wall I believe.
Wait a minute...
How many people use that as the MS bitlocker password....lol
Works at most every "do you have a phone number with us?" Place in existence. Someone out there has a shitload of Walgreens points.
I got it!
Hot take: a million dollar company is a small company. The owner better stop acting like his company is something exceptional
Never mind that surely a big company doesn't explode the second someone calls in sick. The whole sign makes no sense at all.
It kinda does since hiring enough staff to mitigate shortages cuts into their profits.
I'd say it's a lukewarm take at best. A million dollar company is something like a small (<10 people) consulting agency or a couple hot dog stands in a relatively busy area. So like you said, nothing exceptional.
Leaving out self-employed individuals and 2-3 person hair salons and the like, a million dollar revenue is not really something difficult to reach. Especially if you include things like retail, where moving any inventory increases revenue a lot. Even for companies outside retail, when keeping in mind how much one is able to bill for things like trades in the US, revenue increases quite quickly.
Jennifer Aniston is an asshole boss.
A Horrible Boss you would say.
I would be so bold as to say she's a cunt, even..
Million dollar company sounds impressive, but I don't think that is impressive. Like twenty employees already imply a million or more in expenses annually, and require corresponding revenue to sustain.
Yeah, I took it as it's a barely functional company that's being held together by hopes and dreams. The food vendors at my local state fair do millions in sales in just a few weekends. Per Wikipedia, Sweet Martha's Cookies in 2023 made $4.6 million in 12 days.
Hey, ya got Sweet Martha's number? She sounds like a nice gal.
20 employees = 3-4 employees + 1 owner/CEO whose wife needs fake tits and many vacations, but yes otherwise
Needs?
People's needs are things like food, water, air and Costco rotisserie chicken.
In fact this 'need' could be easily fulfilled by two Costco rotisserie chickens taped to the chest and that way meals would be covered too.
No, "your sick" makes perfect sense because it will become their sick when that employee brings it into work. Everyone can have the sick that way 👍
“Then they’ll be our aides!”
i mean you'd think a million dollar company would be able to afford time off for christmas
I dunno. $1M sounds like a really small company….
Little devil on my shoulder screaming “Reply All: *You’re”
Seems no one noticed lets should be let's, as in let us.
This only happens in America. You guys have it bad over there.
Which America out of the two?
out of the four? There's Northern Northern (Canada), Middle Northern (shithole), and Southern Northern (Mexico). And of course all of Southern.
I dont believe in that separation. Its all just people. Politics try to make you guys two sides fighting eachother but you have much more incommon with eachother than the owner class.
My sick what?
I was wondering the same thing. Maybe referring to a specific sickness a person has?
But more likely just skipped English class.
Fuck you Jenny
Everybody hates Jenny, she's a removed.
By the way, many European countries need qualified workers. 😉
How many want Americans though?
Depends on how much money they have.
Organize, unionize!
This would just make me call off out of pure spite
I'm getting flashbacks of the management team at the Home Depot I worked at briefly in my college years. Worst job I've ever had. Management treated us in with absolute disdain, honestly shameful to talk to other people in that manner regardless of the situation.
For someone in a supervisory / managerial role to post a notice like this, it's a sure sign things are completely rotten all the way to the top. I feel sorry for the folks that truly feel like they need that job.
a million dollar company is, what, like, 10 employees?
That's probably why they're desperate for no call offs. In this day a million dollar company still feels like it's constantly on the edge of collapse. No pity for jenny though, if you can't manage around your workforce taking time off during the holidays that's bad management.
I have no sympathy for a company that makes their employees work on Christmas Eve.
Making people come to work while sick hurts the company in the long run. It makes more workers sick and less productive
I get the sick child thing, though. I used to own a retail shop, and one girl would check the schedule, and if I was off, she'd call in sick, knowing I could cover her shift. This was pissing me off, because I only took Sundays off, so every time she did that, I'd have to go 2 weeks without a break, and then she'd do it next weekend, too.
Often her sick daughter was the excuse. Her husband was chronically unemployed ( he never had a job the entire time I knew her, while she worked two jobs), and I finally said "No, have your husband watch her, he doesn't have anything else to do."
And that's when she said one of the most outrageous things I've heard: "He doesn't like taking care of her, because she's a girl, and Hispanic men don't like taking care of girls."
I lost it. "You mean that because you have this communication problem with your loser husband, I have to be the solution? My Sundays are my time to spend with MY kid, but I can't do it because YOUR useless husband doesn't want to be bothered with spending time with HIS kid? Your problems are your problems, and they are not mine to fix. Stop making your problems my problems. I expect you to get to work today, or don't come back."
She did end up quitting not long after, and then called me up months later when she needed money, and begged for work. She had experience, so I gave her another chance. Then she got pissed because after being gone for a year, everyone else was making more money, so she demanded the same pay, and then demanded more, because she wanted the Assistant Manager position that she claimed I offered her before she quit (I had never done that, I would never have given her control of the shop), which was already held by someone competent, who still works for me to this day.
You sound like a true joy to be employed by. Are you hiring?
Also increases recovery time further decreasing productivity
a company worth 1 million is basically a 1-5 person office.
One of them ain't much of a person
My sick?
Yes your sick. If your sick is sick buy it some medicine
A million dollars?!
yeah, I've been with my current company as we've grown from like a million dollars in sales to 20 times that
at a million dollars in sales, it was like five of us doing everything and we all worked so much to get it all done and build things to grow as time went on. so while I think this is opposite of what Jenny is trying to convey, a million dollar company would likely require no callouts at critical times.
now, two points:
edit: also this is almost definitely retail so like yeah fuck Jenny, if somebody is sick, they're sick. maybe close the store on Christmas if this is always an issue because you're not paying people enough to be there
Not even for the arrogance or lack of a weekend; but for the poor grammar and spelling. I don't wanna work for a moron.
I feel like Jenny is the kind of person where if anyone would ever decide to string her up from a tree that loads of people would come to watch and nobody would cut her down.
Everybody would just watch and feel a weight lifted from their shoulders
I once suffered a horrible wretch for an HR manager for ~5 years. When she finally got shitcanned, people were literally skipping through the halls in the engineering wing singing "ding dong! the witch is dead!"
I'm trying really hard to remember her first name, but I think my psyche has blocked it. Same vibes, though.
edit: and the name randomly just came back to me with a flash of horror: Jody
You're thinking Guillotine, not gallows, if you're lighting a weight off their shoulders.
you're sick, buy some medicine
Absolutely how that works
Why did we even have a pandemic? Can’t you assholes just buy some medicine?
Unironically what conservatives actually believed
I couldn't agree more. Acting like a million dollar company is important.
A million dollar company would recognize that reliable, continuous production and sales is more important to growth than the occasional hickup or a few extra bucks in the payroll budget. Thus, the million dollar company would hire sufficient staff that an occasional absence, even at a critical moment, would not harm production or sales.
And a million dollar company would recognize that hiring sufficient staff is a wiser and more cost effective strategy than a possible labor lawsuit along with the associated bad PR.
Nah, you're thinking of a hundred-plus-million dollar company. Being understaffed and disastrously managed is about right for a million dollar company.
Work for a Fortune 500, ~$100b company. Still understaffed. The greed never ceases.
nOoNE wAnTs tO wOrk...
Okay then a million dollar company will pay for the Uber
you're
million-dollar
let's
See me after class
Reading this as an ETL speaker, it gives me second hand embarrassment.
'We' are an exploited labour force whose labour value is stolen by greedy, arrogant psychopaths. 'We' have only so much that can be taken before something snaps and I'm guessing 'You' are the closest company representative within our reach.
But am I a millon dollar employee?
Yup. We're a million dollar company that can't afford managers who can spell.
A million is not that big for a company that has employees though.
Jennifer B Johnston seems like a real cunt
"we're just gonna go on strike"
If you want me to show up on Christmas, just pay me enough to show up on Christmas. It's really that simple, you're a million dollar company, act like it.
someone is overly excited for a million dollar company
Dear Jenny,
Eat a heavily used bag of dicks.
Hey look, a giant sign telling you to unionize
FTFY
And put a cover on those TPS reports!
Your sick
At least Jenny didn't use ChatGPT to write this one.
Name and shame!
Fuckin Jenny
Everyone except Forest.
Probably from Reddit. You'd need to look there
Edit: reverse looked up the image. this is a repost over 3 years old. Good luck
No one ever accused any level of management of being intelligent. They're just liked by the higher ups. At the executive level, they're just heartless and mentally ill.
This. Don't forget about the evil that is HR. I was making good money with a nice career path in that field, but I had to quit because I couldn't handle how they made me treat people. All my coworkers? Absolute robots. They hid behind the "I'm just doing my job" excuse and couldn't identify right or wrong, just passed the orders down without sympathy. We had one guy that they couldn't control with strong connections so they couldn't fire him, and he really fought for his employees. They verbally tore him apart every day until he couldn't handle it anymore.
Ah yes, good old fashioned "Just following orders"... where have I heard that before?
Hey Jenny,
Why does a million dollar company employ someone who can't spell?
Kind regards,
pyre
PS - Suck my entire dick.
If you’ve got enough employees that notices are tacked to a wall, and you’re not doing a million dollars in sales, you don’t have much of a company!
Could be 10 people making 50k a year in a shed with a couple of managers making more. Whether that's a just a warehouse or actually making widgets or some such that's easily a profitable business with a million or so in revenue. Or just a small shop with a handful of minimum wage employees. Maybe an office cleaning service? Some business models can be perfectly stable with a million or so per year in revenue