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Funny @sh.itjust.works

cm0002 @lemmy.world

3w ago

What's wrong, babe?

114 comments

Somewhere out there a dudebro on a dirt bike is looking at this monstrosity and thinking it’s an awesome idea.
- I would honestly try it. And regret it
- Wait... Am I a dude bro now?
  
  You can be whatever you want if you set your mind to it
- Where do I sign for my dirt bike?
  (I actually like the taste of Monster/some other energy drinks, and while I'm pretty sure this tastes like shit I feel the idea is sound if you can find the right beer+energy drink combo. Good ol' rocket fuel radler - seems like a noble quest)
  
  King Cobra + Four Loko is the one I know, it's called a Hyper Viper. I've tried other combinations and they all taste the same, so I'd just go for thematic or pun-based combos.

Ah yes, the Billie Irish

This is a crime.
- A crime of passion.
  
  Our love is a beautiful blend, like monster and Guinness
  
  The passion of the criminals is poor justification to the victims of crime.
- I know right? They completely fucked up the head on that. A badly poured Gonster is almost as bad as no Gonster at all. 4/10.

Guinster
- Monnness
  
  That's if you float the green part on top.
  
  Three Ns mandatory
- I choose to imagine this is Guinan's nickname around the ship when she's not giving Picard or another crew member advice.
  
  gainan is also a place in south america.
- GONSTNESS
- Gunster.
- Guster
- I was thinking Boggy Suicide.

If I did this I'd be worried every time I started my car
- Fucking hell, this one took me a while
  
  Can you give us idiots a clue?

When I drank Guinness from a can for the first time, I had no idea it contained a little plastic ball. So at first, I thought the can had been tainted. When I found out that it must have been added at the factory, I became really annoyed by that damn ball.
That night, I had a vivid dream of drinking Guinness from a glass and the plastic ball had turned into a fly that kept diving back into the beer as soon as I fished it out. The whole time, Grandfather Westinghouse played in the background.
Pointless story, I know...
- Everything sounds like AI to me now.
  
  Are our dreams AI now? (This sounds like something from a futurama episode.)
- I for one love random stories like this so thank you for sharing.
  
  How do we know you aren't another bot?! /s

- Mee likey!
- You eat a lot of paint chips, don't you? Lol
  
  Even paint chips taste better than Guinness
  They also taste better than your weak-ass sideways insult.

Irish weeping noises
- Just more drinking?

Ah, yes, the Irish American...
- So trash?

What the fuck does that monster mean by "Super Dry"...
- Less/No sugar. The dryness of a beverage is about the sugar content/sweetness. Though, I've usually only seen it applied to alcohol.
  
  It's normally used in alcohol specifically to refer to liquid with low fermentable sugars remaining, typically meant that it's been fermented "fully". Beers like Japanese lagers have both low fermentable and (mostly) non fermentable sugars left (and are tasty)
  Source: former process engineer in a brewery
  
  Monster Nitro refers to Monster Nitro Super Dry, an energy drink that uses nitrous oxide for a smooth, creamy, and "dry" texture and a citrus flavor. It contains a classic Monster energy blend, including caffeine, taurine, and B-vitamins, to provide an energy boost. The drink is packaged in 16-ounce cans and has a unique, light, and fizzy feel similar to fine champagne.
  
  They make an alcoholic Monster. Called Beast Unleashed.
  
  The best part is that it just tastes like a normal Monster. But they removed the caffeine, unfortunately.
  
  Its not about the suggar in this case. Its carbonated with Nitrogen (oxide?), like the Guiness. Gives a different mouth feel.

Guinster or nothing.

My heart hurts just looking at that.
- I vomited yesterday looking at this today.

Cursed stout snakebite

OMG... I didn't even drink that and I still want to puke.
I'll be trying it next Friday though, lol

This is one of those drinks that sounds awesome in college, interesting in your 20s, and disgusting once you hit 30.
- Like water.

Thanks! I hate it.

Is monster actually that green colour? I've never tried it and assumed it was a normal colour and the green was just the can design
- What's "normal" for energy drinks? It's all artificial colors anyway. Can be dyed anything
  Edit: but, yes. It's that color
  
  Golden piss is actually pretty normal:
  
  You'd think Monsters would be green, but they're not actually. At least, not the main flavor.

Death to yea and pox on your family.

The first half gets you drunk, the second half gets you sick!
- gives you kidney stones.
- That’s why you’ve got to stir it real good.

Can you don’t?

My m'uiness tips fedora

I'd call that a yellow velvet.
- Frankensteins monster.

Funny how little head there is
- That's what she said

At least it’s canned Guinness
- it was a guinness

We tried this with a random soda, and not gonna lie, really liked it.
1/3 Moomin strawberry lemonade.
- I dunno about soda, but washing down Oreos with Guinness is fucking amazing.

The reason the drinks aren't mixing is probably because of the density difference. Which fun fact actually why wrecks I the black sea preserve so well, the lower level fresh water never mixed with the high fresh water.
- Sure I used to do that with Guinness Stout and Guinness Blonde. I liked how the flavors changed when you got to the bottom. Then they started making the blonde in the US and it turned in to a undrinkable IPA. I could no longer get the real thing. It went from a perfect complement to the stout to a bitter sir hops alot. It was nothing like the real thing(from Dublin) and I quit drinking them.

This looks like it'd give me superpowers
- But the cursed monkeypaw ones

What's not to like about irradiated chocolate?
- antifreeze chocolate.
  
  Kills household pets dead! Lol

It's a frankendrink.
- Can I get it with bolts on its neck?

ill take 2

That's just awful.

sacrilege

Guinning!

Would

Imagine the amount of caffeine in just one pint of glass.

Tried this once with a friend, as a bit. Not great.

Is monster really that color? Euk. Not that I wouldnt drink it if you put it in front of me.

114 comments