I knew it!
I knew it!
76 comments
-
The mistake there is not recording a multi-layered clip of yourself responding in different voices. Time out a delay at the start so you can hit play, start walking, make the announcement and get the "reply" as you open the door.
It's the little details to sell the delusion that puts a spark of genuine fear into the drivers' eyes.
-
while living off post in hampton roads I visited a buddy's apartment and he ordered pizza. The pizza guy didn't even knock just walked and said "Hi Ben, what are you playing tonight?" and set out the pizzas and breadsticks on the table, grabbed a slice, then sat down on the couch while ben packed a bong hit for him.
I was like, whoa, uh... and ben was like: "Yeah, he's also my dealer."
-
I once played video games at a friend's place and we were smoking lots of weed. He had told me a friend was going to come over later. So later that day the door bell rings, I can see him opening the door from where I'm sitting. Female cop stands in front of door and I briefly panicked.
"Hi Julia, come in." (to me) "Let's order pizza."
I'll never forget this image of a German cop in uniform smoking a bong.
-
I'm calling bullshit. No way a cop would do that in uniform. You're lying to deny us the pleasure of the full story where the uniform came off. We see through your german tricks.
-
wunderbar
-
That's way more laid back than most cops in my experience.
Weirdly I have a few cops in my family, just ended up like that it's not really a family thing, and they can never leave their work at the station.
-
-
Pizza
delivery guydealer -
That’s a smart way to do weed delivery if you can get away with it and have orders packed before you leave the house.
-
That sounds awesome! You only have to order a pizza whenever you want some weed and then you have weed AND PIZZA and if he's not a weirdo then hanging out with the guy when he comes could be pretty fun too. Like a kind of a friend on demand service with weed and pizza but little to no obligation beyond that.
-
-
To anyone who feels the need to justify their order to their delivery person: don't.
I guarantee that they'll think about you more if you pull shit like this.
Literally just give them the money, take the pizza, wish them a good night and close the fucking door.
I promise that they don't give any shits what you do with the pizza. Just tip appropriately for your region.
-
Will a good tip by their silence?
-
Depends entirely on its.... csi:m glasses on... delivery.
-
-
Not true. I had ordered from two different places to a hotel room and they arrived at the same time. They were definitely confused and gave me weird looks. Worth it.
-
In the scenario you describe, you are strange. So, I don't think that's unjustified.
It's ok though, we like strange around here.
-
-
-
Am I missing something? Empty house and pizza sounds like a perfect evening to me.
-
I thought this was a meme about the lady shouting to an empty house so that the delivery guy will think she has company, in case he's a predator.
And the deliver guy knows exactly what's going on and thus is hurt that she finds him threatening.
.. Or I could be way off base because I didn't find my explanation funny, just like 'slice of life' kinda post.
There's probably a way more obvious explanation that I'm missing..
-
Maybe she ordered more than reasonable for a single person ... ?
-
It's not unusual to order more just to reheat it the next day, especially if there's extra delivery fee or a minimal amount you need to pay for them to deliver
-
The delivery guy probably gets to keep the pizza if there is no recipient
-
So you're saying that the person in the meme did not order the pizza but wants to keep it and tries to accomplish that by pretending there are other people with them? I'm confused, why wouldn't they just take it without saying anything? How would the delivery person know they are not the one who ordered?
-
-
-
Whenever I delivered a pizza to an empty house or to someone who didn't order a pizza it was great, cause I got to have it. Was one of the few perks of that job.
-
How often did that happen?
-
As many times as they fake called their pizza joint.
-
When I did it, weekend closing time always had drunk college kids falling asleep after they ordered. Someone went home with food every night on Friday and Saturday
-
-
Lady, I don't give a shit about your theatrics, I only judge if you're a lousy tipper.*
*in the US.
-
1 pizza alone is only a little sad.
20 pizzas while alone is when you've really hit rock bottom.
-
It's called meal prepping!
-
It's fine if you buy them as frozen pizzas. Then it's just grocery shopping.
-
-
What exactly is sad about ordering a pizza whilst being alone? Never struck me as something unusual.
I see the 20 pizza part.
-
-
I just woke up and am slow and bleary-eyed.
I could have sworn the second sentence said a bear ran down with the delivery man's face - because he knew.
And I was a tad shocked.
-
whilst living in the woods I visited my moon friend's apartment and he ordered pizza. The pizza guy didn't even knock just climbed the tree, vaulted through the window hole and said "Hi Ben, what are you playing tonight?" and set out pizzas and grenades on the table, pulled a pin, and then sat down with us under the leaf blanket while ben cleaned his rifle and sucked him off.
I was like, woah, uh... and ben was like: "Yeah, he's also my dad"
-
I'm suspicious of this... but I'm not sure why.
-
-
-cheesy crust on the third ? -oh, that is a resounding yes
-
My boy Andy over here is saying you have something called chicken poppers?
-
Something perhaps subtle about that sketch: he orders pineapple on all three pies. There is no way you have a party wherein every guest is okay with pineapple on pizza. So the pizza guy probably could've figured it out from that!
-
-
-
When my wife and kids are way i love nothing more than ordering a pizza and eating it all gradually throughout the night
-
I read this in a really dark way
-
Explain?
-
I love all the interpretations here, but I read it as the pizza delivery man was lured into an empty house to be killed by the customer.
-
-
Speaking as a pizza guy, we know and don't care. I'm not here to judge you for your order or how haggard you look when you open the door. I only judge you based on how well you tip for the service I provide. My store has several regular customers who essentially use us for meal prep and order enough food to last a week. I couldn't care less about how much you order or how many people you're feeding. If you're not a shitty customer, you'll likely be forgotten as soon as I'm on my next delivery.
-
This is why I pick up and ask for extra silverware
-
Pizza
Silverware
-
"Here's the extra silverware for your small personal pan pizza"
-
All the better. You can blame the other people for being savages eating pizza with utensils. It makes it more resl
-
-
-
I make my own pizza so no one needs to know how many people are or are not eating them.
-
I always wanted to be a delivery man. If they invite me and I get to play with their console and eat some of the food.
-
But why does it always come with a doughnut hole in the middle?
76 comments