Age verification
Age verification
Age verification
So, in Ireland, you need to go to a so called Off License to purchase alcohol or ciggies (the latter you can purchase at a newsagent as well). Went to my local grocery shop which had its own Off License to buy some tobacco. New guy working there, apparently from Poland. He asked me for my ID. I gave him my ID from another EU country which is basically the size of a credit card. He would absolutely not believe me that this was my official ID - even though as far as I know, the Polish IDs are the same format. He insisted I'd have to provide him with a drivers license (which I never had in the first place) or to show him my passport (which I didn't own either since you don't need one travelling from one EU country to another). This went back and forth for about ten minutes until I asked to speak to the manager for the first time ever in my life. Manager popped by and I explained what was going on. The manager checked my ID card and told the new guy: 'Of course that's an official ID, you gobshite...'. It made me chuckle and off I went with my tobacco.
For those curious, the "off" means "off premises" (or something like that, they may use a different wording), so a license for a store that can sell alcohol that must be taken elsewhere to be consumed, i.e. a liquor store or package store. The inverse is an "On-License", a license to sell alcohol that may be consumed on premises, so things like bars, pubs, and restaurants.
Yeah the IDs should be the same across the EU except for the background motive
Edit: nvm they're all over the place
The Cypriot looks like a police sketch.
Mr. Liechtenstein could use some sleep.
In Cypress is everything written in 3 alphabets?
Edit: two alphabets, 3 languages?
I’d also accept “The Nations of the World” by Yakko Warner.
Points at UK
"England"
He then also mentions Scotland separately.
Also the Gummy Bears theme.
Yeah but that one isn't hard.
Now crazy frog would be impressive.
"If youre a cop you're a genius because no millennial bartender can resist that"
Duck tales has had a reboot that has the same theme tune. It's no longer a useful form of age verification.
Fine. Tale Spin it is or would you like the Super Mario Bros Super Show theme?
Doyle was the high school star
Everybody thought he'd go real far
But he didn't take a thing from the classes he took
Because he just wasn't interested in his books
🎶
I still say "holy cremola" when I'm shocked. People think it's a Batman reference, but I learnt it from Doyle!
Dark Wing Duck!
Let's get dangerous...
Sometimes, some crimes go slipping through the cracks, But these two gum shoes are picking up the slack...
THERE'S NO CASE TOO BIG NO CASE TOO SMALL WHEN YOU NEED HELP JUST CALL...
CH CH CHIP AND DALE'S RESCUE RANGERS (when there's danger) You know it never fails, once they're involves somehow whatevers wrong gets solved! CH CH CHIP AND DALE'S RESCUE RANGERS!!
Fine. Star Treck then?
Me at 21 with a beard: No questions
Me at 34 with no beard: No questions . Damn, ouch.
I can only do it in Finnish D:
I can do the whole Fresh Prince intro, though! Back in school in the early ‘00s my geo teacher jokingly said “extra credit to anyone who can recite the Fresh Prince intro in front of class” and I stood up and recited it. Got points on my next assignment for it. Thanks, early /b/.
Still not convinced? How about the Animaniacs theme song??
I can almost remember and it burns to not quite have it.
It's time for Animaniacs. And we're zany to the max. So sit back and relax. You'll laugh till you collapse. We're Animaniacs.
Come join the Warner Brothers. And the Warner sister Dot. Just for fun we run around the Warner movie lot. They lock us in the tower Whenever we got caught But we break loose and then vamoose And now you know the plot.
We're Animaniacs Dot is cute And Yakko yaks Wakko packs away the snacks While Bill Clinton plays the sax. We're Animaniacs.
There's Pinky and the Brain Who want to rule the universe Goodfeathers flock together Slappy whacks them with her purse. Buttons chases Mindy While Rita sings a verse The writers flipped We have no script Why bother to rehearse
We're Animaniacs We have pay-or-play contracts We're zany to the max There's baloney in our pants We're Animanie Totally Insaney [Add random rhyme: Pinkie and the Brainey] Animaniacs Those are the facts
This doesn't work if you have ADHD:
Life is like a hurricane,
Here in, Duck-berg!
something something rhymes with cane,
It's a, duck-blur!
Let's solve a mystery,
or rewrite history!
Ducktales! Ooh oo
And that's all I've got.
Fuck! I was singing that song after reading the post and I sang that fucking line right before reading your comment and now I can’t remember that part of the fucking song!
The brain is fucking stupid.
Oh it's worse not only do I have ADHD, back when I was an edgy teenager a friend of mine made up a racist version that's insanely inappropiate and overly violent.
Now we weren't racist or anything, it was the early 2000's we were bored, we thought shock humor was funny, and we didn't think anyone would think we were racist. Trump hadn't normalized Nazism, so people just thought you were being ironic at best or they just didn't give a shit at worst.
But I think of his racist version when I think of Ducktales.
No I'm not going to recite the lyrics for you, are you insane? It's so bad I wouldn't post it if this were 4chan.
I had a similar experience with the devil went down to Georgia. One of the first mp3s I ever had was a parody version about cannabis. I don't know any of the lyrics to the original but I know that one by heart
JOHNNY ROLL A BALL OF HASH AND MAKE SURE ITS THE BOMB
CAUSE THE DEVILS GOT THE KIND OF STUFF THEY SMOKED IN VIETNAM
Racists ruined racist jokes, just like they did with national flags.
Every day I've been making!
This is from memory, might be wrong:
D-D-Danger right behind you
There's a stranger right behind you
Nothing to do but grab onto some Duck-tales!
Tales of Derring-Do bad and good luck tales!
Not pony tails or cotton tails, no, DUCK TALES!
Racecars, lasers, airplanes
How did Ducktales get so many bangers associated with it in the 90s?
i don't know who worked on ducktales in particular but alan menken worked at disney and he wrote so many amazing songs. to be able to pop by his idunno, studio? office? whatever and ask for advice probably helped.
Hmm, how about the Samurai Pizza Cats or Fresh Prince theme?
Perhaps cheat codes for the original Doom, Duke Nukem 3D and StarCraft?
A Newgrounds username and password?
Recite the Konami code, how to use it in Contra, and what does it give you?
What an ICQ number? Especially one that was only 6 digits. I'm so old and even ICQ is young.
Usernames? Who needs those? Just map users to a number. Done!
Imagine somebody making a decision like that today.
showoff mine was 7.
Free money code for SimCity 2000. Also, The Sims. I've got those on speed dial despite their complete uselessness today except to prove I played those games years ago.
I think the Fresh Prince theme has become enough of a meme that many younger people know it, too.
Gummy bears for me lol
The verse of the Gummy Bears theme tune is just the Soviet Union National Anthem speeded up. Same chord sequence.
If you put the Gummy Bears lyrics and the English translation of the Soviet Anthem next to each other, the two sets of lyrics are pretty much interchangeable.
Commie Bears.
Enjoy :)
No? Ducktales not good enough? Okay, then what about ....
Heathcliff, Heathcliff, no one should terrorize their neighborhood. But Heathcliff just won't be undone, playing pranks on every one.
How about Adventures of the Gummi Bears.
Pfft, I would have given the cashier a menu:
Rescue Rangers
TMNT theme
Darkwing Duck
TaleSpin
......woo hoo?
This is the song that never ends.
… Fuck you.
If not, what about Darkwing Duck?
When there's trouble you call DW!
Clever, age and sobriety test all in one
James Bond jr?
If you forget a few of the words, it'll only make it more convincing.
GlomTales! Technically I’m Scottish as well GlomTales! Uhhh—Scrooge stinks, Scrooge stinks, Scrooge stinks, Scrooge stinks GlomTales!
https://youtube.com/shorts/lQcNyM8VMcE
Is the cashier Leia?
I tend to point at the grey in my beard, but they still ask.
Former Retail Worker Here: I got cussed out by a lot of senior citizens who thought I was fucking with them when I asked to see ID. I absolutely wasn't, the machine would not let me process a sale of alcohol unless I scanned in the ID. I didn't have a choice.
This thread needs a bit of Punk Rock Factory 🤘😁
"No problem, I can prove it: If you get between me and my coping mechanism, I'm liable to go to prison for what I'll do. Does that work for you?"
Even the stuff for alcohol can be excessive. I went to Chicago a while ago and they asked a man with greying hair for ID when he wanted to buy... like... dude, he was clearly over 21.
I think they literally have to swipe the ID every x number of purchases or something. Probably varies state by state though.
What if I draw a VGA cable?
I could do it!
my brain finds odd times to inject that theme song into my life
Theme song for Kenan and Kel. Theme song for All That. Theme song for Cow and Chicken.
Humming the "Moon" theme from the Ducktails video game should also count
They used the same song for the 2017 reboot, so that wouldn’t work. (Same lyrics, new recording.)
Can confirm. My kid’s watched the series over summer break and it’s been stuck in my head.
🎶🎵Duck Tales WOO HOO 🎶🎵
Ok what about Darkwing Duck or TaleSpin?
They’d work. They both got referenced in the DuckTales reboot (along with Gummi Bears and Rescue Rangers), but they never got their own modern shows.
Spin it let's begin it bear and grin it when you're in it, you can win it in a minute if you spin it spin it spin it!
Ah, yes, but did they do the full 3 minute version that most 80s and 90s Disney cartoon series had?
It’s only two minutes, but it still has two verses, the bridge, and the key change for the last chorus. I think they upped the tempo in the new version, so they burn through the song faster.
Well what about tiny toon adventures, then? Or the Gummies Bears?
Thunder, thunder, thundercats [blank]
Please fill in the blank, sir.