How are you?

The horrors persist, But so do I

I've noticed a correlation with me skipping yoga, meditation, avoiding excessive phone usage and my stress levels rising, sleep worsening and mood dips.

Thanks for the check up, I'll try to take my health more serious!

I still have my drinking on a leash, I have managed to buy a house for my fiancée and I, I have a job that is good enough and in time I can move if I choose to, I am working on building a life for her and I, and it's coming together

I am getting better at accepting that the choices I have made that led me here cannot be undone, that on the balance of things I have done more good than harm in this world, and that I should spend more time acknowledging my successes rather than chastising myself for things that are in the past

My woman is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I will strive to be a man worthy of her love

That keeps everything in perspective

It's like the human version of "be the person your dog thinks you are". Sadly, my dog is a dick and he knows I am too

There are times when I hang out with someone and I'll be unbelievably happy for a couple days afterwards. Then I begin to feel a bit sad and unmotivated for a few days after that because I want more of that happiness they gave me. That kind of happiness high can be a bit intense.

I have only a small handful of friends these days but the ones I have now are able to show me trust, appreciation and love so easily. Something that has not been very common in my life in general.

I just keep reminding myself that there are people who genuinely care about me as I am and it gets a bit easier to motivate myself again. Little by little.

Also helps that my parents stopped watching the 24 hour news channel so much. Not hearing the news has saved a bit more of my shrinking sanity.

No. I'm pretty burnt out.

Everything I read on burnout says that the best (only?) way to treat it is to reduce or remove whatever is causing such chronic, disproportionate stress. Unfortunately, much of my burnout is caused by the most basic aspects of living (partly because I have disabilities that make it hard to reliably fulfill my basic needs, even with support).

Given that cutting out the bad stuff isn't an option, I've been trying to instead add more good stuff to my life, in hopes that it will increase my capacity and thus reduce my relative level of burnout. I'm so tremendously tired though. I'm trying so hard because I do want to live, and there are things I feel I can offer the world. However, sometimes, in my exhaustion, I find myself thinking wistfully about the depression I felt as a young adult — it was simpler when I genuinely and wholeheartedly wanted to die. In some ways, it was easier to be hopeless and merely staying alive for other people.

I'm just tired.

Functionally yes mentally and emotionally no. I just got word this week that our bosses are taking away our hybrid work schedule and making us come back into the office full time. I like my work and coworkers well enough but it's not enough to keep me in an employer that's abusive. Now all I can think about is the next round of surprise layoffs that are sure to follow. Last year was absolute hell always feeling watched and expendable. This year is looking to much of the same. I'm already looking for another job and kicking myself in the butt for putting it off for so long.

No.

Depends on the mornings. Some days good, some days filled with dread!

Fun…

Nope. But I think I'm taking a mental health day today.

Going to the cystic fibrosis clinic today, I hate going to the doctor but it’s an upgrade because I used to have to go to the transplant clinic instead which would require way more invasive tests but I’m still nervous. But aside from all the shitty stuff going on in the world things have been ok for me, my daughter is home for the summer from college and we have been really relishing our together time

not even close but at least lately a bit better than last couple months

Hangin in, my homie, hangin in :)

It couldn't be going worse, Keith.

it's been really hard, for almost a year... but I got some news last week that released a lot of weight for me.

i still have a lot to work thru, but I'm working on accepting what's in front of me and the choices I made that got me here.

sincerely hope all the homies here are ok, or can find a path towards it.

Not really but I'll persevere, there is a lot of good in my life.

Eh 🤷‍♀️

Bad week, but there's an expiration date to the crazy and we're almost there.

Just keep swimming, regroup next week.

No! 😃

In the beginning the Universe was created.
This had made many people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.

— Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, #2)

Yeah. Fine. You ok?

Ok is a strong word. But then others have it way worse, so I don't want to complain. All things considered I am quite lucky. Gotta try and make the best out of it, right?

Stressed. It feels like the world is falling apart around me. It's like we're speed running our own destruction. I'm ready for some peace.

I have gone full circle, why worry about the inevitable destruction of the empire you live in when you can love the destruction itself. Also I may get to kill a lot of people I fucking hate if I get lucky, how I wish to strangle the life out of men like Ken Ham.

OK!

I feel like I have a bright future ahead.