Vladimir Putin 'soiling himself' sends Russian president health fears into overdrive
cross-posted from: https://lemmit.online/post/5508489
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The original was posted on /r/ukrainianconflict by /u/Mason_Miami on 2025-03-27 20:58:22+00:00.
I hope he shits himself to death and his end is truly painful
I watched this longer than I care to admit waiting for one of them to drop a turd
Just going to post this here, for like.....NO reason.
I hope this will be a recurring incident and he dies falling down shitting his pants
trump, elon, etc should also fall down the stairs shitting their pants
trump taking the stairs? and without wearing his diaper?
I will never understand what drives a person to cling to power like this right up to the bitter end, clearly making an absolute embarrassment of themselves in the process.
I'm not just talking about Pootin either. Moscow Mitch McConnell, Nancy "Insider Trading is my Right" Pelosi, and of course Little Donny himself, among others.
Stalin, a man Putin would love to be compared to said his position was that of holding a wolf by the ears - any slight release and he would be eaten alive.
Stalin died in his office after a stroke. They dont know when it was because everyone was too araid to check on him.
Imo, it's what having a shit load of money does to people's brains.
If you have a lot of it for long enough, you tend to think you deserve it/are important. But if your actions are shit because you are inherently neither of those things, then it creates some painful cognitive dissonance. And when you have that much money, not much is uncomfortable except what's on your conscious. So specifically: You have money, but people don't seem to like what you do with it, and that bothers you literally more than anything else (as all other problems of yours have been solved with money).
So instead of figuring out ways to use your money productively, you just go find others that won't judge you for spending it all on what you like. But that goes both ways, as this group WILL judge you for not liking what THEY like to spend all their money on selfishly.
And what they like, is to be selfish - to build a bigger dick shaped rocket than anyone else who has the money to do the same. So, in order to keep the selfish assholes liking you, you complement them for being one while being ignorant that you are now the same.
The world gets a bunch of dick rockets that do nothing for it. And everyone who spends money selfishly feels they're doing the right thing.
Basically, any societal pressure to spend money productively for the benefit of everyone can now just be suplanted by greedy peer pressure to exploit society for more dick rockets.
Emotionally, building dick rockets is now the only thing that makes these people feel they deserve their wealth. So at the end of their lives, they will do EVERYTHING in their power to finish their dick rocket masterpiece, as to them, it is directly tied to the legacy they're leaving behind.
Without ever realizing their legacy is just another waste of billions that could have benefited humanity though being used in almost any other way. They've tied their own worth and self image to dick rocket building without realizing not a single other person benefits from or cares about dick rockets.
Europe is Putins Dick Rocket. Trump is McConnells Dick Rocket. Exploiting the stock market is Pelosi's Dick Rocket etc.
In the pursuit of their own happiness, they reject any notion of charity in favor of more greed. Because they've never realized that their money doesn't make them happy, it's what they do with it that does. Instead of reaching that realization, they've instead tricked themselves into believing using money to make Dick Rockets could somehow make them happier than the social good-will basic charity always provides.
The more money you have, the more daily annoyances you can pay to get rid of, and the smaller they are. By the time you have billions of dollars, the things that annoy you daily can be EXTREMELY small and petty. You become disconnected from what other people are dealing with.
As fucked up as it sounds…
Why not? Death being the final arbiter what the fuck do you care CNN says if you get to rule the world into oblivion? We care cause we have to deal with the outcome but at that age when you personally don’t… I mean fuck us… right?
I don't know. Do you think that ruling till the end is so enjoyable? In Putins situation it doesn't really improve his quality of life anymore, he's filthy rich anyway. Why not sleep in every morning and spent your last years with some relaxation and enjoying some luxuries. Especially if your otherwise best idea makes you the number one hated person on the planet.
Small PP syndrome
doctors managed to revive the Russian President before rushing him to a specialist intensive care unit
Imagine being the doctor standing over this piece of shit and knowing how many people you could save if you just let him die right there.
And imagine being the guy responsible for keeping him alive while failing to do so. You're probably shitting yourself twice over that you and/or your loved ones will be severely punished if that happens.
You can't really save anyone either way. I don't know who will replace Putin when he dies, but I do know that person will be just as evil and corrupt.
Can't help but wonder what happens if both he and Trump keel over in the next 6 months.
I already have two bottles to celebrate.
Yeeaaaahhh, about that
What so you think will happen when Putin dies? You don't believe the answer to be "democracy, freedom and happiness", right? There will be a power vacuum, there will be infighting, who knows, maybe even a small civil war to figure out who's next, but whoever it will be, it will be bad and possibly worse than Putin. At least Putin wasn't suicidal, I've seen possible candidates who will happily nuke the US and Russia into oblivion just for shits 'n giggles, shall we say.
What do you think will happen when cheeto explodes in a fat explosion? I guarantee you that Musk will try shit, his son's will try shit, possibly, hopefully killing eachother in the process, a bunch of other removed like hegseth or that blonde-whats-her-name idiot from Kansas, I believe... Vance obviously will try to usurp power, and they'll all final because they're just really really db people, but I guarantee you this: no one will actually be working on US democracy.
So those two dead will make the world a little better because two shit stains will have been removed from the gene pool but the world in general might dive into a shitshow
Champagne prices would skyrocket.
I feel like second in commands would come up rather quickly, for trump atleast
No wonder he and Trump get along so well.
In 2022, the Kremlin found itself in the position of having to quash gossip that Putin had an accident after falling down a flight of stairs, supposedly losing control of his bowels "involuntarily" due to "cancer affecting his stomach and bowels."
That's absolutely a rumor - he was in full control of his bowels and meant to shit himself.
Special shitting operation.
Physical Enshitification!
I don't cheer for cancer often, but I will today.
If a piece of shit soils itself, does that count as an out of body experience?
Here's hoping he gets the absolutely agonizing death he deserves.
In a scathing remark, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky recently predicted Putin (or is that Poo-tin) "will die soon, and that's a fact".
He has such a totalitarian grip on the former cold war powers... what will fill the vacuum when he dies?
He doesn't seem like the type to trust anyone enough to groom them into a successor.
Depends on who can control the media and the military. The first few are probably not going to last too long because of the shitastic economy they're going to inherit. Ukraine could get worse if they see it as necessary to prove themselves/distract from the economy or they could pull out so they can consolidate domestics affairs first.
I imagine the immediate successor will be in a pretty shitty spot. Putin has been redlining the Russian economy for years on this personal strongman war. To my knowledge the whole operation is held together by his coercion and cult of personality.
I'll be curious to see if Putin's foreign agents remain loyal. I get the impression that Trump and other puppets are directly in Putin's orbit and might be less likely to attach themselves to a Russia in tumult.
We can hope.
Who is the doctor that resuscitated pootin?? Dude, first order of medicine is "do no harm." Reviving a bloodthirsty despot is 100% fucking harm.
I understand the sentiment behind this, but FTR, the Hippocratic Oath is specifically towards patients: to treat them equally with the sole goal of improving their condition(s).
Hating on one particular doctor fulfilling their oath is misguided unless you want proving you're worthy of treatment before any doctor will help you to become the norm.
The hippocratic oath is mostly about paying the living expenses of your teacher and their family and only teaching medicine to their sons, your own sons, and the slaves of both houses.
The prohibition on poisoning only applies when ordered to do so by someone else. But it does prohibit surgery and abortions.
It does require medical privacy, which is about the only good thing about it.
Additionally, the famous "First, do no harm" it's most known for isn't actually part of the oath.
In 2022, the Kremlin found itself in the position of having to quash gossip that Putin had an accident after falling down a flight of stairs, supposedly losing control of his bowels "involuntarily" due to "cancer affecting his stomach and bowels."
Dafuq?
He is known as Mr Poopin Pants for a reason.
Well Trump gets away with it so I’m sure nothing will happen.
This kinda makes sense then
Putin’s bodyguards ‘collect his excrement on trips abroad and take it back to Russia with them’
Is there any better source on this?
Daily Star UK is a questionable source. MSN publishes articles from many bad sources such as this one, so when I stumble upon a link to MSN, I typically search for a better second source.
The Irish Mirror also posted this, and gets a mostly factual rating from MBFC.
Thanks.
The Irish Mirror does describe this as a rumour. The rumours about health issues are all over the place: thyroid cancer, Parkinson's disease, incontinence, cardiac arrest...
I don't wish him well, but either it's a bunch of random rumours, or he's very seriously I'll.
Where is this coming from? I hope its true and that he is already dead, but I cant see reputable sources talking about this or Zelensky's comments on his health.
Lmao
Yeah, but who hasn't placed too much trust in a fart before? It's easily done.
what do you mean fears? is that somehow autocorrected from hopes?
An ai probably misunderstood what the "thoughts and prayers"were about this time...
We call that doing a scomo where I come from.
The ol' engadine
I'm not sure "fears" is the right word.
Archive link: https://archive.is/vlj3J
One can only hope. Although, what sort of power vacuum that creates remains to be seen.
Did he really piss himself?
Easy fix with "methylene blue!". Please go Google that up. It cures everything! Plus it makes your poop blue. Or maybe it only makes your poop blue and gives you diarrhea. One of the two.
Can permanently stain your cartridge blue also.
Ah, good ole mortality. Death is promise for everyone, Putin. Hopefully Trump gets humbled by death's visit as well.