9mo ago

This is a Test

164 comments

Insufficient information. Need to know the physician's gang affiliation.
- Does the patient look like a removed?
  
  Unconscious and pathetic on a hospital bed? Yeah, kinda. /s
  
  W-w-what?

C. Since it just wants one and I would think the immediate safety of people involves moving it away and then tending to the patient.
Messing with the weapon, checking whether it’s empty, isn’t necessary and you’d still have to move it anyway
- That’s not what Dr Dre would do, fool
  
  Shit. Looks like we forgot about him again.
  
  Forget about Dre. What would Cube do?
- Good, you can work in the ER. Healthcare workers are not assumed to know every firearm and how to operate them, even though we are in America.
- I had a girlfriend that was always studying 24/7 for her tests and never had time for me. One day she asked me to help her study and her entire exam was stuff like this, I kid you not. I realized she was too dumb for me and dumped her.
  
  Lmaooo what was she studying?
- So... If it wanted more than one what would you select?
  
  B and then E just to keep everyone confused.

This is just like the dumb HR tests that are like "You see a coworker engage in inappropriate behavior. Should you A. Notify your supervisor, B. Punch them in the face, C. Piss on the floor.
- At least the correct answer is obvious instead of a test with vaguely-worded trick questions and ambiguous answers. Those are the tests that make me livid.
  
  I know right? Clearly you piss on the floor.
  
  The secret is to choose the most Ned Flanders response.
- I work in a place that's closed off to the public by Federal Law, where you need to badge in, just a janitor, nothing fancy, they make us watch training videos and stuff. They warn us to pay maximum attention, because we'll be barred from the site if we fail, losing our jobs in the process.
  And the questions are things like
  "Which of the following is safe to drink? A) Filtered Water, B) Literal Poison, C) Lava, D, A School Bus"
  It's so blatantly rigged in the favor of the test taker that I suspect they literally wouldn't even have the test if it wasn't a legal requirement.
  We also keep getting tested for things that don't even make sense, like recently we were meant to watch a thing on where and when it's safe to take a smoke break.... Despite the fact that tobacco and marijuana are banned form the site and will be confiscated by security if we bring any... So what exactly are they smoking
  Oh right, we're meant to be smoking chocolate, forgot the Troy McClure film.
  Seriously though, most of my training is entirely irrelevant as they involve scenarios I'd never be in due to the nature of my job, scenarios I'm literally not allowed to be in, or scenarios that don't even exist in the first place..
  And the questions are always things like
  "If your supervisor asks you to do something illegal should you..." and the answers are non-sequitur alongside the real answer, like - A) Report it to the company hotline for illegal activity 555-555-5555 B) Oppress Women & Minorities, C) Run naked into a blizzard, D) Jump off a cliff and into spikes, or E) Pray to Magi-Chan Sonichu in order to hasten the coming of the Dimensional Merge"
  The most subtle examples of this are when they ask a question, and one of the answers is suspiciously and overly detailed, while the others are so overly generic that it's like they wrote the right answer for one, and then just whatever they can think of off the top of their heads.
  
  These are less for your education as it is for management/HR to absolve responsibility: "We trained them to not do
  <xyz>
  , it's not our fault they did it"
  
  fun fact but I find the opposite to be true in trivia games, if an answer is too detailed it's more likely to be false. That's how I won a trivia game about the life of some guy when I barely recognised his name
  
  We have such a test too, but not as extremely dumb. But it's still in the realm of: how do you wear your high-vis-vest? A: well visible from all sides B: hidden under your jacket to not get it dirty.
- I snorted while eating and almost choke thanks to your comment.

Is this multiple choice or just a suggested series of steps?

Now I want to see a show where an unsuspecting anxiety ridden Nurse accidentally takes out a mob boss and has to run the gang while juggling their work, love and social life.
- Unironically an unexplored Nic Cage movie genre.
- You kind of just described the subplot of The Brothers Sun.

A. Looks into the barrel with a flashlight

How about treat the patient 😶
- That's step F, after performing the other steps in the order of DAEBC.
  
  Finally, the correct answer!
- Look. Doing A-E is going to be expensive enough for the young fella. I don't think he can also afford gunshot wound treatment.
- In pretty much any "help anyone" kind of procedure or training step 1 is to ensure your own safety.

DAEBC easy peasy
- That's a nice movie script.
  
  House M.D
- I like the way you think

F*. Shoot the patient in the head.
*Police version only.
- *shoot the victim in the head
  FTFY
  
  Thank you, my bad.
  
  *as police, shoot the black person in the head
  FTFY

Every medical drill is like this.
"I asses the patient"
"Haha fuckyou they had a katana, you are impaled, and failed to assess basic vitals. They go into respiratory failure. As such you failed america
- I don't like the DM (⁠｡⁠•́⁠︿⁠•̀⁠｡⁠)
  
  "Patient is presenting with chest pain and shortness of breath."
  "Roll for initiative."

I vote for E

A => D => E
- Beat up the rival gang members until they are all laying on the floor in a pile => B.

E.
"Don't worry Mr. Patient, I'll avenge you!"
- When Agent 47 is your doctor.

F. See if gang member has insurance to cover for his treatment
G. Charge extra for handling firearm
H. Deferred treatment

Considering that he got shot in the arm, not the face, my real life response would probably be, "really, man? You didn't think you should give this to someone else before ems got there?" That's why I'm not a doctor. Because I'm pretty dumb and bad at hiding my reactions. Also the part with all the blood.
- I don't mind the blood, but the unsaveable dying women and children plus the poop and infected smells is why I never went into medicine. Also my bedside manner is more House than Mr. Rodgers, so I would be sued so fast, like career ending speed run fast.

Lots of ways to help people. Sometimes heal patients; sometimes execute dangerous people. Either way helps.
— Mordin Solus

C is okay but why are we not allowed to put the safety on and safely remove all of the ammunition?
- The general risk assessment is that medical personal don't know as much about firearms as Law enforcement - and LEOs don't know much. And you generally have other things to do that are more important than causing a negligent discharge in the ER.
  Beside, do you really want to trust the Triage Nurse with a loaded firearm?
  
  Triage is going to be a bit quicker today.
  
  I don't trust leaving it behind a desk counter or in a cabinet with bullets in it, personally, I feel like that's the more dangerous option.
  
  I'm confident that, maybe with 5min instructional time from a gun guy (or gal, women are the fastest growing group of gun owners today), anyone with a phd could be taught "push button, remove mag, rack slide" and "push button, swing cylinder, push ejector rod out."
  They really aren't as hard to learn to use safely as Alec Baldwin would have you believe. Shooting accurately is another matter but simply being safe is as easy as learning 4 rules and a basic knowledge of how common firearms function.
  Edit: here, I'll link a video where ~~for three easy payments of $29.99~~ in one whole minute and 38 seconds you too can learn how to clear semi auto handguns (the most common type of gun by a mile) safely like a pro!
  You see how easy this is? A surgeon should be competent enough to learn how to do this.
- Medical staff arn't trained with guns and they figure there's less possibility of an accidental discharge the less people are touching it
  
  Oh I apologize, I kind of saw through the lense of an American so I assumed basic firearm knowledge. We have 15 guns per person so there really is no excuse not to know over here. With that in mind the possibility of discharge goes down because a gun with no ammo does not discharge.
- Couple reasons.
  One: do you know anything about that model of firearm? Does it have a safety? Can it slam-fire if handled improperly?
  Two: Is there important information that can be conveyed by the present condition of the firearm. Was it a shooting or an accident. Would clearing the firearm remove important information that can be used to ascertain what happened?
  Three: Preserving the firearm can preserve evidence. While that is not necessarily part of the duty of medical staff, there's no reason to risk destroying evidence if the firearm can be safely isolated with minimal disturbance.
  Four: Why do it? An isolated, secure gun isn't going to decide to start blasting people on its own. What advantage is there to handling the gun more than is necessary in that situation? Get it out of the way and keep working.
  
  You're already assumed to be handling the gun from the onset. Most handguns are pretty standard if they're from this century. The physician is likely wearing gloves and the conviction isn't as important as everybody's immediate safety. The gun isn't in an isolated secure place, this is a physician's office.
- Most modern handguns do not have a (manually operated) safety.
  "A" is the answer closest to "remove all of the ammunition".
  
  by firing it which is stupid.

All the above except C obviously. Id probably sedate the patient though and see if they got any booger sugar or money on them, they ain't gon need it where they headed. "Knowhatimsayin" -J to the motherfuckin R-O-C

B.
Specifically at an oblique angle for maximum ricochet.

You've never done a desk pop?

Everyone here just straight up ignoring the fact that option B is completely correct.
- It's a trick question, you fire the bullets into the patient to increase revenue
- 100%. Need to get the bullets out the gun
  
  Eject the magazine and then pull back the slide to eject anything in the chamber.
- It's a free gun without a paper trail, why would you not tuck that shit. You do homie a favor and you get a nice drop piece to fold some clothes later.

B, but you actually use it to get attention and yell to everyone to "calm the fuck down and be cool." Then safely and discretely dispose of the evidence to get in good with your local gang.
- "Be cool honey bunny."

retribution

What's actually the answer though? I would think A, D, C in that order is probably best, but I'm guessing they just want C?
- The most lawyer friendly answer is probably C.
  I am not a doctor, but I do know how to handle firearms, so I would also unload and ensure that the gun is not in a condition to fire. This would probably dock me points for diluting potential evidence or some such horseshit, but it'd still be the right thing to do. Provided you knew what you were doing.
  
  Doing anything to the gun is probably a bad idea, even if you have experience with firearms. This gun came from a gang member, it could be in a very janky altered condition that makes it act unpredictably. If you're going to try to disarm it anyway then you should still move it outside first before attempting that just in case it malfunctions and fires while you're trying to manipulate it
  
  Hospitals have security for a reason. You touching a gun when they have procedures on how to handle this situation is dangerous. If you are on staff you follow procedures. If you are just there and do know about gun safety you would know not to pick up that gun.
- It's not difficult.
  A is wrong because whoever wrote this is in no position to evaluate if the person reading it is capable of "to check if the gun is loaded" without blowing their own head off.
  D is wrong because the person whoever wrote this is in no position to evaluate if the person reading it is capable of "hold the gun personally" without blowing their own head off.
  C is the only correct answer.
  
  E is answer cause removed be whack
  
  A is additionally wrong because you don't know the condition of the firearm. If it is not mechanically sound, manipulating it in any way could cause it to discharge in the worst case, or possibly jamming it in an unsafe condition. Best to let someone get it to a safer location before trying anything. There's likely no especially safe direction to allow a firearm to discharge in a hospital, much less the ED.
  
  I agree that's what they want you to answer, but you can't move it to a safe location without handling it, so C necessarily entails D. Unless there's a designated firearm handler in the ER you can call over, which to be fair, maybe there should be.
- Lmao I would absolutely not trust some random Healthcare worker to both verify a handgun is unloaded, and safely hold onto it for any amount of time. The answer is clearly, obviously, and only C.
- I wouldn't trust a doctor to clear a weapon. It's stupid easy, if you know what you're doing.
- Tbf if nobody in the room has experience handling them, it'd be better to tell a nurse to grab the security guard or something than to handle it at all.
  That said, if there's a possibility one may be in this situation they should take the 5 whole minutes to learn one day, as the actual safest option is to A) know what you're doing and clear it or B) don't even touch it until someone does clear it, though this could impact medical care or the speed with which it is delivered.
- B is the correct answer.

Isn't it blatantly C?
- Nah bro it's clearly option F which isn't shown but includes all the answers except C shaking my smh
- No, it's E or B if there are no other gangs left.

C. I worked at a hospital and at the hospital I worked at they would have called Security to secure the gun. There may even be an off duty police officer on staff at the time of the incident.
- A then C. If you know how to do it[^1] ofc. If you don't, then assume it is. Very different situation if the weapon is loaded. Both require C, but one much more intensely than the other.
  [^1]: Hopefully /s is obvious enough here, but I'm not taking chances: /s, OK?

On the one hand, c seems logical. But on the other hand, e is tempting...

Depends. If the patient lives, it's D. If he dies, you need to revenge him, so E
- Exactly. No one wants a doctor who won't fight for their patients
  But as a student, you should have humility and assume you're going to fuck up and kill your patient, that's the trap
  E. Final answer