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jjjalljs

@ jjjalljs @ttrpg.network

Posts
1
Comments
2917
Joined
3 yr. ago

  • [DCSS] Curiosity killed the cat run

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  • That'll be easy XP once you've cleared the depths!

    I think I opened one of those in zot once and deeply regretted the orb of fire party I found.

  • What dating apps are really optimizing. Hint: it isn’t love

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  • Yeah, it can be hard, but many things worth doing are hard. If you start with the bare minimum, the other person's first impression of you is that you half-assed it. Would you be extra interested in someone who's too half assed to even read your profile?

    Put in the hard work. If you don't have the energy, don't use the apps. Half-assing it is just going to make you unhappy.

  • What dating apps are really optimizing. Hint: it isn’t love

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  • Except when actually trying to make a match, it’s more advantageous to literally swipe right on everyone to maximize matches and then unmatch if you match with someone you aren’t interested in.

    This isn't true if their system punishes people for swiping "yes" on everyone. While I can't be certain that's the case, it seems very plausible it is. Swipe yes on everyone, your profile is down ranked, you don't get as many good matches.

    Additionally, tinder and hinge only allow you a limited number of yes swipes per day. If you blow them on the first ten profiles, you're going to have worse results than if you spend a little longer looking at profiles.

    Furthermore, on hinge, you can send a message with your like. Your chances of having a conversation and date go way down without a good message.

  • What dating apps are really optimizing. Hint: it isn’t love

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  • Thinking about my friend group, about half the people met their long term partners on dating apps. The other half is a mix of work and large social groups (eg: people who all go to certain kinds of music festivals)

    I guess it varies by age and region.

    https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2020/08/20/key-takeaways-on-americans-views-of-and-experiences-with-dating-and-relationships/

    While meeting partners through personal networks is still the most common kind of introduction, about one-in-ten partnered adults (12%) say they met their partner online. About a third (32%) of adults who are married, living with a partner or are in a committed relationship say friends and family helped them find their match. Smaller shares say they met through work (18%), through school (17%), online (12%), at a bar or restaurant (8%), at a place of worship (5%) or somewhere else (8%).

    Some other sources I'm seeing say it's as high as 60% of couples met online.

  • How do you guys get around/to places?

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  • I live in NYC. I live here in large part because I don't need a car to live here.

    I walk for most daily needs. There's also abundant bus and subway options. I would bike more, but one bad accident has me scared to ride with traffic again)

    Maybe housing is more expensive, but sometimes you get what you pay for.

  • What dating apps are really optimizing. Hint: it isn’t love

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  • I think dating apps are mostly used for hookups

    This isn't especially true. Maybe Feeld and Tinder are less "serious", but the idea of dating apps is mainstream enough that you find all sorts of people and goals.

    The capitalism and for-profit nature does make them all kind of suck, though

  • What dating apps are really optimizing. Hint: it isn’t love

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  • The top of the funnel I could see an argument for not putting a lot of thought in. You're just trying to get a pool of potential matches. (The apps are cruel for making you pay for this and not just giving you the list up front)

    But once you do have a match, you have to put in some effort to stand out. A lot of people get a match and all they write is "hey", and then they go right into the trash. Why would I engage with someone who just wrote "hey" when I could instead talk to someone who read my profile and said something personalized?

    Also swiping yes on everyone might do strange things to their recommendation algorithm. Unfortunately that's a black box, but I wouldn't be surprised if that puts you in some sort of chum bucket shadow ban situation.

    And also, yeah, making you pay for basic filters is a trashy design. Match group should be broken up.

  • What dating apps are really optimizing. Hint: it isn’t love

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  • Most of the apps are trashy and don't optimize for good matches.

    At the same time, many users half-ass using them, or deploy a variety of self-sabotage. (No, it's not that you're not tall or hot or whatever. It's more likely your impersonal message didn't warrant a response)

    These two facts together mean a lot of people have truly bad outcomes.

  • From Microsoft to Microslop to Linux: "Why I Made the Switch"

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  • Cool. Been on Pop!_os for a year or so. Not memorable issues. Plays games fine.

    Microsoft should be broken up. Even if they walk back some of their AI slop, they're too big. They don't fail like they should for releasing a bad product.

  • Families in New York City demonstrated against a proposal to allow cars in a local park. A politician showed up in a car to mock them

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  • guessing there is a correlation with MAGA.

    Stupid, selfish, people.

  • New York City to Bring Back Year-Round Outdoor Dining. The Previous Mayor Worried About Losing Parking Spots.

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  • Good. Outdoor dining is great. Fuck all those cars wasting space

  • School speed limits shouldn't exist

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  • Maybe this could also go in c/fuckcars

    In absolute time spent, driving 20mph instead of 45mph for a few minutes is rather small. But people lose their mind, and don't care if it means putting kids in danger. People don't think like that.

    I think the problem isn't so much the signage and limits as it is we built roads that encourage driving unsafe speeds. That and we built a world where everyone driving their own private vehicle is normal, and often the only practical option. But changing all of that is a lot harder than lowering speed limits.

  • Trump voting husband's wife picked up by ICE because of a 10 year old bounced cheque.

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  • These days, she senses an awkwardness with some friends. They’re sorry for what happened to her but still support the administration’s efforts

    Those friends are assholes.

  • 10+ year manager named Joe was apparently fired for bringing cookies to be thrown away before their sell by date to a food pantry in my town

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  • 58 UK public libraries have parenting books with advice to encourage children to detransition

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  • On the one hand, you don't really want to give people the power to decide what books are available. Assholes would use that to remove queer books, for example.

    On the other hand, that power is already implicitly in place. There's finite space in a library, so they must choose a subset of all possible books. I'd want to know how the existing processes work before suggesting changes.

  • Removed

    Group Dynamics

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  • Reminds me of a long road trip I took in my youth. After a couple days we were basically speaking in in-jokes

  • We've all met this DM

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  • This joke is why I will say to DMs getting railroad-y, "are you sure you wouldn't rather write a book?"

  • What's wrong with society

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  • Well, we were literally walking in Manhattan when it came up, and couldn't take the euclidean straight path. We could only walk on the grid of streets.

    (This is setting aside factors like waiting to cross, or a busier street)

  • Geoguessr, but actually fun

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  • Interesting. The inability to pan and walk around makes it very different. I liked "walking" around in geoguesser until I found a landmark or something, but I never played competitively or obsessively.