Fuck you, Genie
Fuck you, Genie
15 comments
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I'm verbose enough that I would spend an exorbitant amount of time crafting the perfect one wish.
At least I'll have 16 do-overs lol.
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Relevant sketch.
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Before I even hit the link I knew what this was. Kudos!
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FuckThank you, Genie-
No no no inflation
There aren't actually more, they're just less powerful
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'you know what, i'll even let you undo a couple. you're probably going to regret those first few eventually.'
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Wish one: points at the dumpster fire I am* fix this.
Now I have 16 wishes to fuck around with.
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You are now a potatoe no feelings no worries but you are "fixed"
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I don't need the other 16 wishes anymore.
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First off, your tapeworms. Yeah, you really should've refused your friend's pork chop. Next, your excess body fat. Next, your extreme aversion to feeling hunger. Everyone with a healthy lifestyle feels what you'd call “starving”, like, 2/3rds of the day. Now, your cancers. Yes, plural. Lung, skin, and colon. Pro tip: wear gloves even if your employer doesn't provide them. Also, wear sunscreen. Next on the list… checks notes ah, yes. Done. What did I do? Do you remember what your nightmare last night was about? Yes, you had a nightmare. Excellent, anti-trauma neural circuit lobotomy was a success.
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Great, I can solve all these problems with 3 wishes. I wish to be a sentient robot that's indistinguishable from a normal human being. I wish for a steady supply of spar parts in case any piece of me breaks. And my last wish is that I have the capability to repair, upgrade and enhance myself as I see fit.
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“You might want to get a pot of coffee going, we’re going to be here all night.”
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I’m in this meme and I don’t like it
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Is it just me or does it seem like there would be more issues with 17 wishes
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i feel like it would hit harder if the genie took pity on you and gave an impromptu therapy session to customize a single wish, since that's precisely the opposite of what genies do.
15 comments