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  • Discovered my young daughter is self harming so really not great at the moment.

    • When I was 13, my parents discovered that my younger sister was self harming and even wrote a suicide note (and that she might be closetedly lesbian). All they did was yell at her, berate her, force her to cut up the note and blame social media. Somehow at that age I was more mature than two adults who decided to fucking have children. Though thats the average in arabia I guess..

      Please don't be mad at her, instead help and show that you love and care for her.

    • That's a really helpless situation to be in. She's your daughter, she's someone whose safety is hugely important to you, and she's hurting herself so badly. How are you going to try and handle it?

      • I think we have gone through all the emotions this past week! Speaking to people it seems like we caught it early on compared to others but it is still terrifying.

  • Tired, anxious, depressed, feel like shit in general. Declined an invitation to play boardgames with some old friends this weekend because I feel tired and anxious and depressed and overwhelmed and now I have more anxiety and guilt because I feel like I should have gone and I will further lose contact with them over this and they will hate me now.

  • Not great.

    Last night my house flooded and I'm still cleaning up water and nasty shit. Everything smells like piss.

    It triggered a fight over the fact that I still don't have a full time job despite months of looking, and we are stuck in this place until I find something better than 3rd party labor.

    My vehicle is leaking gasoline while running and the shocks are fucked but I can't afford to fix it. My wife's vehicle needs transmission work.

    Also... gestures wildly around the US

    Depression is a removed and I don't have insurance to go to a therapist or get my broken tooth fixed.

    So yeah. Not great.

  • Not OK. Did not sleep well, again. Anxiety and frustrations work-related which will impact my home life. I need to rest.

    • Not sleeping is hard, you need that to function. How's your sleep hygiene ?

      • Terrible. A lot of my sleep issues can be traced to my work schedule, which is something I'm trying to improve but my boss is actively working to make worse for me.

        When anxiety hits, as it does with unresolved conflict, the negative effects compound exponentially. I can't fix the root cause right now: I work too late for my well being and I can't fix that with an incompetent authoritarian at the helm.

  • Really not great. Can't motivate myself to keep studying, gotta find a new job because my contract won't be extended. My boss, who kept telling me everything was good and I did a good job, not only not extended my contract but also wrote me a rather bad recommendation letter. Just told me in a meeting all the "problems" he had with me that haven't been mentioned in any of the previous meetings. Just feel like shit and would rather never work again and spend my life watching TV shows...

    Oh, and don't forget that the AfD is getting stronger and stronger and will fuck over my trans best friend and my husband, who wasn't born in Germany and has dual citizenship.

    • Remind yourself as often as necessary: that's entirely your boss's fault. Nobody is perfect hence I know you made mistakes, you human you, but telling you one set of things to your face while spreading the opposite things to others is just such a dick move.

      You have some kind of worth, so don't let your boss gaslight you into believing that crap that he spouted. Even if some portion of it were true, you obviously can't trust the source. Find a better source of judgement - yourself even if you have time to heal although it sounds like not, so someone else in the meantime.

      Touch grass, seriously, it will help - both the nature and the exercise part. TV has its place too, especially in healing, but you'll want more than that as you regain your confidence. The good news being that YOU are in control of that!:-)

      (I am no psychologist tho, just my personal thoughts)

  • Bad, thanks! But I'm focused on taking care of my mother's medically delicate cat while convincing a kitten to leave the door to the medically delicate cat alone.

  • Surviving but not thriving.

    It seems like every time we get a decent chunk of money, some kind of event occurs and strips it away. Last time it was a car repair, this time unexpected tuition. I’m thankful that we’re not going into debt, but damn.

    The promotion at work has come with a lot of added stress. I’m proud of the work I do and I think it’s worth it I think for now. But it has meant that I’ve had to pull back on some other goals and hobbies. For example, I haven’t touched the book that I want to write in over 6 months.

    Cycling has atrophied as well, but we’re moving again in 3 months, this time back to a place with more cycling events that I know, so I’m really going to try to get back into at least a Tuesday night ride. I used to love epic randonneuring adventures, and I wanted to get a few more in on the bucket list, but I’m starting to fear that my body is getting too old to take them on. I’m certainly feeling a sense of urgency. When you’re in your 20s and 30s it feels like you have all the time in the world, but it’s hit me lately just how scarce time is as a resource.

    My wife and I are starting to get to that age where the window to have a second kid is closing. I’m hopeful that it will happen this year, but then again, another baby will take away from those other goals as well.

    She’s also struggling because the job she had lined up after school this June was HHS funded, now that is in jeopardy. We’ve already bought a house in the new town too; so we’re paying rent and a mortgage at the moment. We can afford it on my salary and her internship but I feel it’s tighter than I have been since my early 20s.

    The overall situation of the world also weighs heavily on me. I try to do my part where I can. These things ebb and flow as they always have, so I try to remain hopeful. I’m encouraged by what is happening today. We must stay vigilant to take back our rights from those who strive to oppress us.

    I just got into therapy in October to help me deal with these things. I always had a stigma around therapy, ironically my wife is a therapist. Anywho, it was really worked for me. I am trying to realign my thinking so that I’m not always the victim, that the things we do and the intentions we set are FOR us and our future. I can certainly tell a marked difference between the weeks I can attend and the weeks I don’t. I’m hopeful here as well, but for now I’m surviving, not thriving.

  • I'm going great outside of one thing. I miss my soulmate. It's been over 2 years. My heart is still empty. I'm dating again but I feel hollow.

44 comments