I've been binging Grey's (currently on the Covid season) and wouldn't consider Mer to be a "pick me girl". Especially after Derek, she has focused on her career and family and only has occasional flings. Her self esteem doesn't come from any sort of external validation.
A quote from this season about Mer sums it up well: You've always been your own person. A force of nature. You've never needed anyone but you.
The article does not say that the actress felt that Meredith was a "pick me girl". It highlighted one specific scene that she felt was cringe, but fans of the show loved.
I did. Though it was a little rushed the last book, i like it when things are drawn out more, I'm used to 800 plus page novels so that's probably just me