3w ago

Stitch rule

88 comments

#womeninmalefields is describing common situations and phrases that women experience and turning them upside down by switching genders.
The analogy to this one would be a man telling a surgeon to surgically tighten a woman's vagina after giving birth. This is a common and disgusting joke.
- Common and disgusting, but unfortunately not always a joke. You probably know this but for the benefit of others who may not be aware, the Husband Stitch is a real thing that used to be pretty commonly done regardless of what the woman wanted and often without her foreknowledge or consent. It's an extra stitch or two placed when sewing a woman back up after a vaginal tear or episiotomy during labor. The purpose is to make the woman "tighter" so her husband can still enjoy having sex with her even though she's given birth, which is staggeringly misogynistic and cruel. And it usually results in really painful sex for the woman because her vaginal opening is artificially small plus now it has inflexible scar tissue. It's a horrific thing to do to a woman, especially after giving birth.
  
  still enjoy having sex with her
  If you need that to enjoy your partner you don't deserve them. That disgusting
  
  Thank you for providing additional information!
  
  Another thing to note is that the episiotomy itself is no longer a recommended procedure for routine births. The incision lengthens recovery time and brings complications of its own.
  
  Yep, a useful comment. I had no idea about such a thing.
  
  ... Jesus fucking Christ...
  
  To add to your "for the benefit of others" explanation, this is also not a historical relic. It's still happening.
  I work with refugees and a lot of women escaping fundie warzones are living with variations of this nightmare. So much mutilation, as little girls, preteens, post-giving-birth... Infections are common, tearing is common, and sex is torture. I've been doing this job long enough that I recognize the walk.
- Jesus Christ, what kind of sick person comes up with stuff like that?
  
  After the mother gives birth to a healthy baby boy, the father leans to the doctor and whispers “how long until we can have sex?”. The doctor replies, “I clock off at 3.”
  
  I worked for a man that thought it would be a funny thing to say soon after the delivery.
  Look, I'm a guy. I laughed, until his (now ex) said that he actually said it.
  I mean come on. It's funny as a joke, you don't ACTUALLY say that to a delivery nurse, my god.
  
  Men 🤷🏻
- Not just a joke. It’s a thing that used to be more common but is still sometimes done.
  
  I had a doctor straight-faced tell an entire class of college students about it, and how it was a good thing. This was within the last 15 years. I would bet it is still far more common we'd want to imagine.
- Thanks for explaining it, wouldn't have understood it otherwise.
- Thanks for explaining it

Jesus christ, it feels like everyday I learn a new dreadful horror about American life. How the fuck have we not run out of these creepy facts yet? The country is soo fucked up, I swear to god... It's honestly hard to belive it's a real place, it didn't really sink in how much of a shit hole it is until I saw it my self... It's a twilight world where pain is a virtue for some reason.
- Wait, was/is that only a thing here‽
  
  Edit: misread. I thought you asked what this was about. Yeah, I'm sure it wasn't just here.
  Men would sometimes have doctors add an extra stitch to women after childbirth to make them tighter. I think I've even heard sometimes doctors did it without concent of either party. Some women didn't even know it was done until they had complications and found out.
- One of America's most popular songs is about eldritch gods living under the Appalachian Mountains.

i dont get it :<
somewone pws explain the joke to me
- Not sure if it was ever actually done or just urban legend but there used to be something called “the husband stitch” where an OBGYN would add another stitch while repairing an episiotomy (when a woman tears a bit giving childbirth) supposedly to make her vagina tighter. A lot of things there don’t add up, but that’s what the joke is about.
  
  Oh, it's real. This was offered for my sister-in-law.
  
  It’s not a joke nor a myth.
  
  Why do people think it's an urban legend when women describe how they've been medically and sexually abused? 😐

Circumcision, fgm, the so-called husband stitch… wtf, people? If you’ve got genitals you’re happy with it seems a challenge just to keep them intact against the lunatics who want to chop and stitch. What is wrong with humans?

Probably even more dangerous in the back tbh

The adding "rule" makes anything cool rule.

??? so he cannot defecate properly? I get the point, but this makes no sense.
- To make him tighter when she pegs him, clearly
- It's to highlight something fucked up that's sometimes done on women after giving birth.
  Quoting another comment in the thread:
  the Husband Stitch is a real thing that used to be pretty commonly done regardless of what the woman wanted and often without her foreknowledge or consent. It’s an extra stitch or two placed when sewing a woman back up after a vaginal tear or episiotomy during labor. The purpose is to make the woman “tighter” so her husband can still enjoy having sex with her even though she’s given birth, which is staggeringly misogynistic and cruel. And it usually results in really painful sex for the woman because her vaginal opening is artificially small plus now it has inflexible scar tissue.
  
  Right, I'm just pointing out that it's a bad meme. I understand what this is about.

Husband bad. Good old Boomer Humor.
- This isn’t boomer humor, it’s highlighting a misogynistic practice by flipping gender roles - pretty non-boomer imo.
  
  Oh, right! It's only boomer humor if Wife Bad.
- For reals. I'm mid-30s and I only remember hearing about this when I was younger. I'd completely forgotten about it, and never would have asked for or suggested it happen.
  Good job bringing it back to the forefront so misogynistic men can know of it and use it to torment a fresh, new generation of women.
  If your partner jokes about having surgery done to you without your consent, just leave them--whether you're a man or a woman.

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