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What have you done recently to lovingly annoy your spouse/significant other? For example, this morning I brought my wife her toast singing the first line from "Baby One More Time" in Brittany voice...

"Baby baby, I brought you your toast again."

Def annoyed her.

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  • Whenever she sneezes I'll give the first one a "Bless you" and the second something like

    "Oh GROSS! Can you take that outside?"

    "Babe we talked already, I'm not into your kink, stop iniaiting like that"

    "Jesus anything for attention with you...."

    It's now at the point where when she starts we are both glaring and smirking at each other.

    • I've said, "Oh, fuck you! Grow up!" and similar to friends. But it's best immediately after sneeze one, and you should sound properly offended at the temerity.

  • Not recently, but this is one I'm particularly proud of. She texted me to complain that she was music-less in the office because her MP3 player failed.

    Well of course I phoned and was able to sing one line about never giving her up before she hung up the call.

  • I look her in the eyes romantically, with a touch of mischief, and state "you're a very useful girlfriend".

    I only do it a couple times a year at most.

    The look of disdain is priceless.

    She knows I love the hell out of her, and the anti climax is brilliant.

    "What am I?! Your bloody house cleaner?!"

    Then we laugh. Cuddle. She feigns a cold shoulder.

    Too much fun.

  • Texted my wife to tell her I was heading to a mate's place for "a dip in the pool and some pizza", then followed up with a texted stream of consciousness, one line at a time, about how I was planning to eat the pizza - not dip in it, then pondering what dip on pizza would be like, followed be weighing up the pros and cons of about 4 or 5 different dips on pizza, and the different pizzas they might work on.

    It took about 7 or 8 messages before I got her eyeroll response. Worth it.

  • I sneak up behind her and give her "tiger rubs", which is aggressive up & down motion on the ribs & side meat.

    She loves it x20 years

  • She squirms when I gently mess with the little ringlets of hair on the back of her neck. It’s cute.

  • I'm single, so I have to settle to annoying everyone else around me by pretending like I'm going to start talking about politics

    Works every time

  • Unprompted, I make a weird "surprise" face that freaks him out for some reason.

  • Mine is finding a picture of an animal with its rear end towards the camera, and then saying "hey, guess what?" to her and when she says "what?" I show her the picture and say "Bunny* butt!"

    *or kitty, doggy, etc

53 comments