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  • I can partially speak to this from the inside so to speak. I'm not that old, but I had a heart attack and open heart surgery at the end of 2018 and complication after complication through all of 2019.

    All of which puts me at greater risk for depression and suicide.

    Just when I was medically cleared to go back to the office, we shut down for covid and I haven't been back since.

    I started looking for a support group for heart attack/open heart surgery survivors and it was far, far more difficult than I thought.

    Plenty of support groups for other conditions, plenty of support groups that advertised as women only, I really couldn't find anything that accepted men.

    I didn't need a "mens only" group, just someone who wouldn't turn me away due to my gender.

    I finally reached out to one of the women's groups going "Look, I know I'm not your demo, but I hope you can direct me..."

    They set me up with a national org, https://mendedhearts.org/ who had an unbranded chapter in my area and I got to talk to people in my situation, it helped, but it was not easy getting there.

    There were other problems during lockdown, I became a victim of domestic violence, against which I was helpless due to my medical conditions.

    Same problem. No real support for male victims of domestic violence either.

    The police directed me to various mental health agencies, for both myself and my wife, but this was peak covid and NONE of them called us back. NONE. Not even a "sorry, we aren't taking new patients", they just completely ghosted us.

    My wife finally found a therapist who would "see" her remotely, which was a condition of our staying married, and things did get better.

    But after all that... it was really dumb luck. Other folks aren't as lucky.

120 comments