What's an artificial limitation you put on yourself that has improved your personal life?

Usually in the form of asking questions:

1. "Does this task take 5 minutes to do and do you have 5 minutes to spare?"

If the answer is yes, then just do it. It has helped me keep things tidy a bit better rather than spending a full day cleaning up everything. Now, if tasks get left, rather than a full day cleaning & tidying it's only an hour or so.

My space being tidier has brought me some much needed stress relief.

2. "Do you need this item right now? Can it wait until the end of the month when you get paid?"

Struggling with impulse purchases so this question has helped me stop spending as recklessly though I do relapse sometimes but nowhere near as bad as I was.

3. "Got paid? Great! Have you money-potted your paycheck?"

Further aiding my financial responsibility efforts, every time I get paid I use my bank's money-pot feature to portion it out to make sure rent, bills, phone, food, transport, subscriptions, activities, etc. are budgeted appropriately. The rest is stuffed into savings to resist the temptation to spend it.

4. "What would a healthy and active person do?"

To lose weight and improve my fitness, everytime I want to get something unhealthy for lunch or dinner I ask "would someone who's trying to lose weight eat that?" or "would a healthy person chose that fizzy drink or have water instead?". On my way home from work I go to the gym and on the days when I don't feel like it I ask "Would someone who's active skip going to the gym? Sure they would if they're feeling unwell and sick, are you feeling ill and sick? Ok you're tired, but can you at least do 5 minutes on the treadmill?" because I don't want to be breaking that habit that has been going really well for the last 8 months.

Honestly at the moment my life has been a bit of a rollercoaster so I've not been asking myself these questions and been slipping on the good habits recently, speaking of which...

5. "Did you keep the habits up? No, that's ok you stumbled a bit there. Now what small changes can you make to make the good ones easier to do and the bad ones harder to do?"

At the end of the day, I'll take the path of least resistance so I've got to make sure that path is the one that will lead me to the outcomes I want. I'll be having a think about these this weekend because I am determined to get back on track, so I'm going to sit myself down and work through it like a friend would.

Which leads me to the final question:

6. "Would a friend talk/act that way to you?"

I struggle with self-confidence, self-esteem, and self-worth. Some days I really feel like I just have no value and the self-loathing is immense so when I get overly critical and verbally/physically beat myself up I try to hold onto a moment of calm and ask that question to myself. I don't need to answer it because I know the answer and just need a moment to just breathe and chill to try and break the negative thought spiral.

No alcohol at home. 4 drinks a day max except once a month. I’m still an alcoholic and I don’t plan to quit drinking, but my therapist and I think I’ve got it under control after 3 years of these rules.

After a long, unhealthy relationship, I ended up in a very promising relationship.

It took many years if half truths to her, and then full disclosures, and eventually, a full and total disclosure of my past, my desires, my weaknesses, the whole lot.

She barely flinched. She saw me for who I was / am.

From that moment we bonded deeper than I've ever thought possible.

Nobody could hijack us. Nothing could try to surprise us and derail / damage us. Shame was thrown out the window. There is none. We know everything. We meet as honestly as is possible each day.

Do it. I highly recommend it. However, there was a right time. If we'd done it too early, we wouldn't have worked.

So with that backstory. Always telling the truth to my partner. No matter how scary it seems.

Truth, truth, truth.

Whenever there's elections I wait for somebody to mention the result in conversation unprompted and find out that way, to stop myself from doom scrolling

Go outside for 3 miles a day minimum 6 days a week. Can be bike, walk, run, ski, hike, etc. I usually do quite a bit more but this has kept me in great shape and it really helps with my focus and productivity.

1 hour every night i can do anything i want that includes no electronics. I usually just sit and think things through and it has helped a lot with my anxiety.

Go outside at least once a day when I don't need to be outside.

Actively look to "give glory" or kudos to people around you.

On a practical level, be it an opposing force opponent, or even someone on your own squad - like a family member - looking to give glory encourages me to engage with my environment on a real level when I'm drifting off or getting lost. I'm trying to connect with the intentions of others while still trying to achieve my own. These don't have to be lose-lose situations, and they shouldn't be either.

If I can compliment someone on a tactic or a response committed under stress, I'm trying to say I see the other person. I'm also saying honestly that the action was valid, and others can understand my position without guessing. In a world where some feel they have to live by deception or seek glory for themselves exclusively, simply validating someone else gives strength and encourages others to tough out their positions in the face of toxicity.

You're also forcing a change of perspective, and refraining from dwelling on the faults of others or yourself.

Even if the kudos goes to the opposition, I'd rather compliment someone I believe I can work with, and build mutual respect.

One is from the YouTube channel "How to ADHD": put things away, not just down. I was diagnosed in my early 40s and it shed some light on the source of a lot of problems in my life. Letting clutter accumulate has a huge effect on overall mental health.

The other one is a social media thing I picked up years ago that I soon realized applied to real life, as well: before posting/saying something, think about whether it benefits the audience to read/hear it. It really makes you introspect about the energy you're putting out into the world. It also makes it almost second nature to realize whether someone else is on the whole adding to or subtracting from your life. I've met so many people who I'm convinced would never speak if they weren't constantly seeking others' validation or trying to gain something material for themselves, and it's scary to think about how much worse off I'd be if I'd gotten close to them.

I don't drink at home. I'll let loose when I'm out with friends but at home I don't drink. I had a period of my life where I was very close to becoming an alcoholic. It wasn't until a recovering alcoholic (using extremely broken English) suddenly seemed very concerned with me and told me I could talk to him any time that I realized where I was heading. A couple years later I messaged him to tell him how important that moment was to me. I don't even know if he could read English well enough to get the point but I hope he understood.

I never use escalators. I always take the stairs. It is usually faster, and the little bit of extra cardio is always a good thing

No caffeine multiple days in a row. I often enjoy it, and I don't think it's really that bad for you, but I don't like the way it adjusts my personality and state of mind if that makes sense and it's easy to get addicted enough to start feeling like crap if you don't have any.

I brush my teeth whenever I come in from outdoors (even if that's multiple times a day). That way, it's doesn't block me from going straight to bed once I start falling asleep in the evening.

Eat no meat products. You can call it vegan but I feel great.

If you're thinking about something that takes less than 2 minutes, you should just be doing it. I will admit I got this from one of those productivity guys

My alarm is across the room from my bed. It's been a long time now, but I definitely felt better after I started doing it.

For reference, I'm now 43 years old.

Around 20 years ago, around age 23, I decided to keep my wallet in my right front pocket, 24/7, save for bathing and clothes changing. Yes I do sleep with my wallet in pocket, it never leaves my vicinity.

I keep my wallet where it can't easily be stolen, right next to the family jewels ya know...

no problem solving in bed when you should be resting. if something pops up, identify it & make a note (mental or otherwise) to address it at a later time.

Stop responding to text messages a much as possible after 9pm. Really helped my sleep and staying sane.

I only buy mint-type candies. Junior mints until the trade war; something local now.

I need something to crush sweets cravings, but I also want to limit how much I'm actually going to eat. With the strong flavour, I find those work pretty well.

For relationships: "Is what i'm about to say/do benifical to me, this person, or the relationship?"

If not, maybe it is me ego or hurt feelings, and so I should ignore it for now and if I feel the need to, I can later analyse it and decide again.

Also, never go hungry or emotional to the grocery store.

Professionally, never removed down or laterally. If you're going to removed up, do so in private.

...I think that was from some war movie... Saving Private Ryan? But fuck if it isn't solid advice!

Guess more of a reminder than a rule but: "ambiguous behaviour is not aggressive behaviour".

Have fun

Penetrate deeply and stimulate the clitoris simultaneously

Refusing to use social media like Snapchat, Instagram & Twitter. Major downside is my generation is mostly using them so I know fewer Zoomers on the Fediverse but honestly, I would take that over me comparing my body to guy's fitness picture and feeling insecure about it. Also, I barely interact with people I know in my high school and I to some extent, wish to be forgotten from them. Some really have messed with my mental health, that's all I will say.

While I'm waiting for my food to microwave, I will do the dishes. I only do them for as long as my food is microwaving, so they don't all get done, but most of them get done in this time.

Don't spend more than you can afford

Time limits on apps where I tend to have arguments on politics