Thank you for the response! It's been oddly validating reading other people's shared experiences. One of my first responses to reading supplied material my therapist later provided was a solid facepalm because it was legitimately word-for-word the issues I brought up in the first session.

I was briefly in a special needs program early on during school which I did enjoy. We'd go on excursions away from the standard school schedule. My parents were looking out for what they thought were my best interest - despite how narrow-minded it may be. I always try to remind myself that family rarely if ever acts out of malice but misguided views

My therapist brought up the possibility that I may be neurodivergent. I had gone through a difficult breakup and was increasing angry and impulsive and had no idea what to do.

After a few sessions, she noticed a lot of my issues of feeling alienated and social exhaustion were very similar to other clients she had. I was technically diagnosed early on but my parents disregarded it and so I continued life without knowing otherwise.

So throughout my adolescence, I had difficulties with "fitting in" and a pervasive sense of incompetency that developed into long-term depression. My perpetual exhaustion was due to the fact I was masking constantly. It's been freeing and I've been a lot more forgiving of myself especially to my past.