Are you using GNOME or KDE? I know those can definitely utilize shell scripts from the right click menu. I'd recommend grabbing FFMPEG (probably already have it) and SOX. You are going to need to create a pretty basic shell script that extract the audio as a wav using FFMPEG, changing the speed with SOX (you can use FFMPEG but I find the audio warping dog shit), then FFMPEG to convert to mp3. For both GNOME and KDE the context menu shortcuts typically only pass the path to file you have selected as an argument. So you'll need to create a script for each speed. Honestly, it's not gonna be easy. You might find something in the Dolphin (kde filemanager) settings that will enable some basic context menu scripts for converting video to mp3. If this is too intimidating then I would check github for an FFMPEG wrapper. It's the a/v swiss army knife in linux.

All of 4 gen-x usenet users pictured

also, phonics

Giving up on phonics was a horrible idea. I'm not sure whose to blame for that but it clearly was a disaster.

The tools were annoying but the process wasn't very hard. Unprotected FTPs were pretty common early on and IRC download bots were around before torrenting. Sharing applications like Kazaa, Scour, Limewire, and Napster were super simple. There were fewer roadblocks. I wouldn't want to explain to someone how to get a private invite, understand the trackers rules, and ensure they do not get VPN leaks.

I can't even tell you what us Gen Xers did

They watched tv and traded tapes.