No gods, no masters.

I'm a sign, not a cop

I guess it was that shrimple after all.

As someone that is currently going through KC1 and is old enough to have used floppy disks, this hurts me so deep.

Do you have anything with a good vintage? I like my beans finely aged.

The man heard "Fuck the police" and thought "Say less".

God, corporations are so fucking boring.

Every time I read Erlich's name, I hear Jin Yang struggling to pronounce it.

Kids say the darndest things.

Omg, ur lolxdsorandom. :p (Please help me, I just want to eat pizza and play Halo at a buddy's house.)

You know it's a real problem when you're still losing the 10mm in your sexual fantasies. Where do they go...?

Give it up, we know you're actually six cats in a trench coat masquerading as a network engineer. I've seen enough photos of cats in server racks to know when I've been had.

If they were a more humane society, we likely would.

Can you blame the guy? I'd be frowning pretty fucking hard, too, if I was in his shoes.

Tankies can eat shit.

Have you checked the bin for any more rotisserie chickens?

Nice to know that these types of people are out there. Treasure them.

This reminds me of an old joke where there's a pothole in the street causing major accidents, and the solution is to move the pothole in front of the hospital so that people can get medical care more quickly.

Don't forget the shag carpet.

Who said they weren't creating any new worthwhile holidays?