imo the ukraine stuff in and of itself is a hallmark of subordination to the us
You miss one important thing: the existance of unlimited European racism. Even IF Russia had looked like the better alternative over the US (it didn't) once normalization started in the late 90s/early 2000s, I still don't think the Europeans would cooperate to mutual benefit -- we truly are that racist. Which makes it even more frustrating given that
it would be in the eu’s best interest to forge ties with russia
is true.
Subordination to the US is defo one thing, but never ever underestimate how western European racism shapes our material conditions.

As someone who have spent quite some time in the upper echelons of society I can confidently say MOST are very high on liberalism, i.e. ignorant, uninformed, idealist. It is not that they think there is another point or are scheming for some kind of endgame (yea obv, the Palantir CEO might be, but if we are talking everyday elites), it is simply VERY easy to go through your whole life as a liberal if you never are exposed to the contradictions and contrasts of global capitalism (and when you do get exposed, it is nicely wrapped by your media)
If you are born with relative privilege and work hard, make good money, etc and just go about with your life, it is very easy to just...not think about these things. And whenever you might stray away and think a bit more deeply you have a plethora of "political analyists" or other media telling you how you should think about it to feel good about yourself (and superior to many others).
These are the kind of people we need to reach, educate and get on our side. And since October 2023 a less "lib-rotted" conscious has started to form in this group, even if it is tiny, tiny, tiny.