Bless us, Spider-Man, for we have sinned

I love dropping that on theists, especially the ones who go down the line of "Well the Bible proves the history... We found Jericho!"

And I'm like "Yeah, and New York is real so Spider-Man must be real too!"

Thousands of years from now, someone is going to uncover an old Warner Brothers warehouse and will be convinced we made all these Batman and Superman statues because we worshipped them.

Whereas others will roll their eyes and say that the statues are clearly dildoes.
- Our descendants will clearly have superior anal capabilities

(Allah / Jahwe / God are all just different names for the same deity. Which makes a whole lot of shit in this world more "fun")

Go Spidergod.

Spidergod
Her name is Neith
https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Characters/SpiderVerse

One will find many Peter Parkers in New York City. We cannot be certain which Peter Parker was Spider-Man, but we cannot exclude Spider-Man as an option.

We can find many contemporary, non-Marvel sources for Spider-Man. This means that even those not part of Marvel were well aware of Spider-Man. This means Spider-Man was likely a real living person.

Spider-Man appears in various government records. Those have all disappeared due to tampering in 2025 alongside other government data, but those records were described in records from other authors within a few hundred years of that time.

You really want that poor unlucky bastard to be real? I mean, his life is pretty much just pain.

Which one are we talking about here? /s
- That's a great question, isn't it?
At least he has super powers… I don’t
- Would you tell us if you did?

I used to believe when I was younger (thankfully stopped believing relatively early on) and in retrospect... yeah, it's so fucking obvious that no god exists.

This post is so true. The only source is a book, literally nothing else. What makes it trustworthy? The fact that it's thousands of years old and is still relevant? And literally nothing else? Also ignoring the obvious that any god existing is dumb as hell.

It's all just a big "Trust me bro". Perhaps some of the biggest lies in history...

Imagine accidentally creating a religion by lying that you didn't have sex when you are pregnant.

I recently stumbled upon Professor Dave Explains https://youtu.be/xsEKgpWYSgs

I didn't even know the extend of the anti science / creation / conspiracy theory bullshit out there.

It honestly shook me to see these adults talking about fairytales as if they were real... From ancient aliens to flat earth to bigfoot there are fucking adults that believe this shit.

It's no wonder our society is going to shit, because for every Dave trying to explain science there is 20 Joe Rogan's spreading bullshit to the masses.

There was a time in my childhood, when I wanted fiction to be real, and really hated fiction that I didn't like because it meant those bad things will be real. I thought religion was like a tale that adults also believed in.

I got somewhat more open to religion during my teen years, as far-right orgs tried to (ideologically) groom me, and of course it involved me getting bombarded with "if you're atheist, you'll be sad and suicidal" type bullshit.

Picking up a copy of Julius Caeser, by Shakespeare

Seems made up to me. I guess he wasn't real.

Flips on the movie Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter

Also a fictitious person.

In fact, as I'm working my way through these books and beginning to question whether any President has ever existed.

Just because Spider-Man 616 isn’t real, doesn’t mean Spider-Man 199999 is real
- This, but I'm denying the existence of Thomas Jefferson by pointing to two different fictional depictions.
Is there perhaps some other sources than Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter that point to him being a real person?
- Sources that may be contemporary to when he was alive.
How... DARE... you!
Vampires would be the dominant species on Earth if ol' Abe hadn't handled it for us!
He died for our veins!
This is not an argument in good faith. This is not a level comparison.
Just because a clearly (that is, without serious challenge) fictionalized account exists doesn't mean we should ignore the mountains of separate, unchallenged, easily verifiable, unbiased evidence that an historical account is beyond likely. No such body of "evidence" exists for Jesus, as defined by mainstream Christians; the same as for God, Yahwey, Allah, or Odin.
- we should ignore the mountains of separate, unchallenged, easily verifiable, unbiased evidence that an historical account is beyond likely
  There's no separate, unchallenged easily verifiable evidence that contradicts the claim that a Jewish Rabbi lead a mass movement of ecumenical reformists in the 1st century AD.
  No such body of “evidence” exists for Jesus
  We have an abundance of accounts, many of them from the Roman scholars of the era, describing the movement and its members and their beliefs and activities.
  Then we have a litany of Gospels, of which the nascent church had to scrub down precisely because so many of them were believed heretical a century later.
  I'm a bit tired of hearing "Nothing exists" when what you're really saying is "I don't personal accept any of the testimony because I don't like the people saying it".
Except the authors openly acknowledged that those are fictitious works, and there aren't large groups of people trying to force the world into a new dark age based solely on the questionable moral lessons they've cherry picked from those books.
- Except the authors openly acknowledged that those are fictitious works
  Plenty of fiction is written without acknowledging its fictional nature. Hell, the spoofy historical comedies even lean into incredulity, adopting stylistic hallmarks of serious journalism and documentation.

TIL atheists have no idea what "proof" is.

noun
evidence sufficient to establish a thing as true, or to produce belief in its truth
Key being evidence.