24h ago

You wake up in a random rural house without memory of how you got there, there is dead person on the floor right next to where you were lying; What would be your first thoughts and what would you do?

For simplicity, let's assuming this is your country, in some random rural area
The dead person has a kitchen knife plunged into their chest, blood is still fresh
The dead person is a random stanger, you've never met them, they are just a random average (non-famous) person
There is no one else in the house
You have a tiny bit of blood on your clothes, but not a lot, you are unsure of whose blood it is
You have no injuries
You were never drugged or anything, you just happen to mysteriously, spontaneously get teleported there, while sleeping. You went to sleep on your bed and just woke up only to find yourself in this scenario. (Bloodtests will show nothing)
You wake up right in the morning, at sunrise
There is electricity and running water, small amounts of food in the refrigerator, enough for maybe a day
You don't have any items with you, not your phone, nothing beside the clothes you slept with (if any). There are clothing in this house belonging to the dead person
There only electronics devices (besides appliances) in the house is the dead person's smartphone, in their pockets (no lockscreen codes or anything), and a laptop (no password). This house has wifi.
This house does not have any security cameras.
There is a car in the driveway, belonging to the dead person. No other vehicles, no bikes or anything like that.
Nobody (yet) knows this person is dead. They live alone.

So, would you think that you did the murder, and just turn yourself in; or assume someone set you up and try to escape? How would you escape this scenario and avoid prison?

Remember, this is a rural area, not that many cameras.

So do you make a run for it? How?

Or do you just call the authorities and hope you don't get charged with the murder? Very awkward interrogation tho, nobody would believe you. I doubt "I don't remember how I got there" is a strong defence.

What is your "game plan"?

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"why does this keep happening to me ?"
- Oh no, not again.
  
  First thing you do? Unzip.

Throwaway account: "...asking for a friend."
- xD

That sounds like the beginnings of a modern adaptation of the game Zork
- West
  you move west and arrive at a door.
  Open door
  you open the door and peer inside. It is pitch black inside
  West
  you step into the darkness. If you remain here, you are likely to be eaten by a grue.
  
  You
  Are likely
  To
  Be eaten by a grue
  If this predicament seems particularly cruel
  Just think of who's fault it could be
  Without a torch or a match in your inventory

My first thought is that someone else brought the two of us here to kill us. They already got this stranger, and they're coming back to kill me too.
So, I'd quietly gather some survival supplies and sneak out of the house. Once I can hide far enough away from the house, I'd find a phone and call the police.
It doesn't even cross my mind that I could be the killer until someone accuses me of it. I've never met that person, so why would I even lay a finger on them? I'd just tell people what I know as accurately as I can. No, I don't know how I got there, honest!
- This is the correct answer. I wouldn't assume I'm the murderer, I'd assume I'm the second victim.

It is difficult to write exactly what a person would do in such a case, most people can write one thing, but if this really happened to them, it is highly likely that they would act differently. I don't see the point of trying to run away or hide the crime, neither morally nor logically, the only good idea is to call the police, in any case, even if you try to hide the murder, murder is a murder, you know, a crime, and secondly, it may come up in the future and you will have bigger problems.
- Yup, my presence is going to leave some kind of evidence so might as well call it in but don't say anything about why you are there to the cops and just lawyer up.

I'd probably remove the knife and plunge it into my own chest. This all feels like way too much work to deal with.
- You gotta wash it first, you don’t want an infection
- I doubt that you would have had the courage to do that.

Immediately close all the windows, lock the doors, and check the body for maggots. Checking the body for maggots will clearly indicate about how long they have been deceased. With the windows and doors blocking out view from the outside, you can then use this information to make the critical decision of whether to have intercourse with the corpse or not.
- make the critical decision of whether to have intercourse with the corpse or not.
  I guess we all have our priorities.
- critical decision of whether to have intercourse with the corpse or not
  We need Lemmy Gold for this 🤣
- Hmm yes. Only issue with is there would have to be flys buzzing around to lay eggs into the corpse. If there are no flys them you're in the clear.
- Feels so wiggly.

I’d think I’d better start setting up my S.P.E.C.I.A.L. stats and collecting bottle caps.

I am playing GTA V and have just swapped players to Trevor and I will continue playing as such

Oh...definitely pull the knife out. Then throw up on the body. Then leave, while placing very clear handprints on the walls.

I was with you with this thought experiment until the teleportation part and knowing that you weren't drugged. In this situation, you couldn't possibly know that at the time and that really changes things from a bizarre but realistic scenario to one involving aliens or some such.
- You also couldnt know no one knows the person is dead... or that they live alone. And unless you killed them, then someone knows they are dead.

I would check in any case whether the person is really dead.
I would look around for other people.
Next I would try to find out where I am.
Then probably call the police with the person's phone.
No, I would never assume that I have done a murder.
And yes, our police works differently than the one in Hollywood movies.

Find a way to call the authorities. I don't trust my brain at the best of times, and for all I know, I'm the murderer despite no recollection. Because of no recollection. That'd be a sign of some kind of mental problem, right? And if I'm otherwise fine and not responsible, there's still a whacking great gap in my memory (for how I came to be there) and there's a murderer on the loose.
I'd also try not to contaminate the scene any more than I had to.
Knowing my luck, the police would pin it on me anyway, but since, as I said, I don't trust my brain, as far as I know, they might well be right and it might be the best thing for everyone if I am put away somewhere.

I'm not going to prison, and the police are unlikely to believe me. So I would dispose of the body best I could, scrub my shit down, and start going south until I hit Mexico.
- That requires you to be in Usa first... 😉
  
  Well the first bullet point explicitly says "a random rural area in your country" so yeah

Contact my fiancée, then the cops, then find myself a lawyer and spend the rest of my time absolutely shitting my pants
Fiancée first, because she's my highest priority in all things and the dead guy ain't getting deader. Then the cops, because to contact a lawyer first looks incredibly suspicious and I live in a civilised country where there is almost no police corruption and I wouldn't have cops trying to pin it on me out of convenience. The other reason I'd contact my fiancée first is that she's the smartest person I have ever known, and she would be straight onto organising shit to help

Delete their browser history

For a probably more sane view, my wife said she would probably call the authorities.
I would use the victim’s laptop to figure out where I was, and their phone to call my wife to have her begin driving in my direction with the intention of meeting her on the way. Then using bleach based cleaning supplies or worst case a wet rag, wipe down any surfaces I might have touched, including the knife. Then use the victim’s car to the nearest interstate observing all traffic laws to meet my wife along the agreed upon route. I remove any cash in the house and gas cans if available.

"Again? Ok, no more ambian and rum, this time I am serious."
First see if the blood pattern tells me anything of value. Next steps are to find peroxide to clean my clothes of blood and if I am out of luck, improvise. Then I'd see if I can figure anything out about what happened. Wipe off the knife handle, scrub under my nails with bleach, cut the phone lines to the house, break the back door or a window, find anything of value to steal and bury nearby for later retrieval, then do some shots of alcohol, get in the backseat of the car and touch a bunch of stuff in the car, puke, and start walking along the road until I can flag someone down and ask to use their phone to call the cops.
After that is just a matter of knowing nothing besides going to bed after 2 Ambien and a hearty amount of 94 proof rum and waking up in the unfamiliar car and stumbling into the house and finding the stranger dead, didn't have my phone, didn't look for their phone because I wanted to GTFO in case the murderer was still there, went to get help and here we are.
Best case no big problem, worst case I get a few charges that won't stick unless the victim's phone can prove I did it. If it can prove I did it, rip bozo.

I'm not investigating those bullet points. First thing I'm doing is trying to get help for myself, and getting "help"/police for the dead person. And also a lawyer for myself.
Getting help for myself includes contacting people at home, confirming the timeline and alibi.

A few days ago I watched an episode of Death in Paradise with close to this kind of setup. The guy in question assumed he's the murderer because he held the weapon in his hand once he woke up with a concussion. Though he had absolutely no reason to kill the victim, but because of how he woke up he simply assumed he did. He turned himself in.
As for me in your scenario, I think I'd try to figure out first who the victim was. Shouldn't be too difficult if the phone and laptop are unlocked and there's unlimited internet access. Fleeing is probably kind of hard because my DNA might be all over the place. I mean, I already don't know how I got there, so who knows what's happened while I was teleported-sleeping? Where the fuck would I be and flee to anyway? Might as well investigate as much as possible and hope this victim has no nosy neighbours. Contacting my close friends via internet and try to make it clear to them (with pictures!) what's going on.
This all probably after having screamed my lungs out first.
- Contacting my close friends via internet and try to make it clear to them (with pictures!) what’s going on.
  They will most likely call the police, but whether the police will find you is, of course, another question.
  
  A couple of them are extremely trustworthy enough to join in the investigation with me. I'm not going to contact every damn friend I have, that'd be silly!

Do I remember my whereabouts for say yesterday or my regular life, or am I just brainwashed and woken up next to a corpse? Two very different scenarios
- You remember your entire life, and the last thing you remember is going to sleep at home, then the next thing you know is you wake up to a dead body next to you.
  
  I would never think I committed the murder, especially since there isn't a lot of blood on me and I don't know anyone.
  I've experienced false dream awakenings from nightmares worse than this scenario so one thing I would think is that I'm probably still asleep; I'll run away.
  I've also experienced extreme denial once in my life, it feels like you forget quickly whatever traumatic trigger just happened (but then you remember it, triggers you again, you forget it again, repeat). That' another possible way my brain could react under those circumstances, I can't predict myself. I'll still run away.
  Now, if I somehow avoided both scenarios then I would probably still run away, hoping to find someone who can help. If I'm walking for days without reaching any towns/people then I'll probably be considering to just move on and not look back; wait for the police to find me first. But I wouldn't try to escape. If they find me I'll be honest.

I take a nap.

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