Warner Bros. Confirms New 'Gremlins' Movie and 'Beetlejuice Beetlejuice' Sequel

Come and get your recycled franchise, nostalgia-bait slop! We can't be fucked to pay any creative talent to write stories about anything new or interesting, so here are some of your favorite characters' zombies that we acquired being dangled in front of you.
I'm about y'all, but I'm really looking forward to Barbie 9 and Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice!
- You just summoned, like, 5⅓ Beetlejuices. Beetles Juice?
  
  Well in the original saying it three times again puts him back in the model. So really, looking at it, t looks like they summoned him and put him back a couple time. He would currently be summoned and 2 more away from being put back.
- I agree with your sentiment, but the studies show people will go see what's familiar, even if it doesn't end up being very good. It's a safer bet for studios
  
  Absolutely, and that's the problem. Studios optimize for low-risk because art is just an investment vehicle for them, which is directly at-odds with what art actually should be: creative expression.
  
  And everybody knows that going for the safe bet is the sure-fire formula for a classic that will return profits to the studio for decades.
- There are no new stories. Haven't been for millennia.
  Stop asking for re-skinned old stories.
  
  There is a difference between recycling an existing story by re-imagining it and throwing out generic slop with a nostalgia filter. The Terminator and Halloween are the same story if you ignore the details. Indiana Jones was an homage to the old adventure serials.
  Having the same overall structure can make something the same story at the surface level, but how it is implemented is what makes it fresh and original. Nostalgia bait is not putting the effort into making something new and fun, but instead focusing on how they can cram member berries in so people can remember the better movie as a distraction from the slop they are watching.
  Not all movies with nostalgia moments are nostalgia bait either. Good sequels exist too.

For our next question: Why is nobody going to the movies any more?

Obviously Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice was inevitable.
Red Letter Media initially joked about Gremlins 3 bringing chaos to the White House and Capitol Hill, but the concept doesn't work anymore (for obvious reasons). So they did a new pitch to set it in Hollywood instead.
https://youtu.be/iKSemmbDAp8
- Every movie concept is improved when it is set in Hollywood!

The industry has become completely adverse to risk.
It's all rehashed slop until the end of time.
- The second Beetlejuice wasn't that good, why the fuck would they make a 3rd? Not going to theaters to see that.
  
  It made money, though.

I would accept a "B film" where it's 2133 and the Gremlin apocalypse has already happened and the remaining survivors are attempting one last daring assault.

This makes things easier for countries that want to boycott American products.

Gremlins 3 is highly unnecessary. Hell, Gremlins 2 already even made fun of itself for being unnecessary.

And now Pongo's review of Rocky 5 ..... thousand

Would be very nice if they don't fuck Gremlins 3 up. Cautious optimism is the way.
- Or, if they do fuck it up, they fuck it up like gremlins 2. Because I loved that.

Gremlins Goonies and Beetlejuice super late sequels.
I guess Gen X isn't getting so Ignored now and finally is getting all their sequels.

Finally gremlins 3!