Of the offenders for whom gender was known, 90.3 percent were males.
Of stats that include "fathers", "husbands", "sons", "boyfriends", etc... You don't see how those stats as you present it is meaningless to the OP's discussion and proves "Men are dying an order of magnitude more."? Men can kill their fathers, husbands, sons, etc...
You're talking about who's doing the killing, not what gender the people who were killed were.
Of the 12,996 murder victims in 2010 for which supplemental data were received, most (77.4 percent) were male
Source: your source.
You're cherry picking really dumb shit. Especially when your own source PROVES the person you're arguing with correct.
Don't get me wrong... What you should have quoted:
Of the female murder victims for whom the relationships to their offenders were known, 37.5 percent were murdered by their husbands or boyfriends. (Based on Expanded Homicide Data Table 2 and 10.)
This is a problem. But that's of the 22.6% of homicides on the table already (removing the 77.4% males), so we're talking about ~8.5% with no given information about what that looks like in the reverse, nor what the Female-Female rates are. That's a loaded stat without the other two being present on the page as well. If raw numbers match or are similar enough... then it's not what you're insinuating it is at all.
The only actually relevant thing you can probably stat with that page is that men kill more women than women kill men. Except that would be expected since Men on average are physically stronger and are more capable of defending against an average Woman. You would expect more "success" in men attempting to kill women, and more "failure" in women attempting to kill men with just that fact alone.
And lastly, since you already omitted data..
Law enforcement reported 665 justifiable homicides in 2010. Of those, law enforcement officers justifiably killed 387 felons, and private citizens justifiably killed 278 people during the commission of a crime.
I bet this also has a directionality to it as well that would need to be applied.