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Lemmy Shitpost @lemmy.world

other_cat @lemmy.world

3mo ago

Mine's a Juicer

100 comments

The apartment I bought had cabinets with fake, decorative drawers on them. Except it turned out that one of those drawers wasn't decorative. It was just stuck.
Inside there was a full set of silverware (as in literal silver) from the 60's complete with the original receipt. It's worth thousands of dollars. I guess whoever lived there before me was in no condition to pack and the people who packed didn't know about the silver...
- Gonna pull extra hard on my fake drawers tonight.
- Psh when I open random stuck drawers all I find is jars of teeth
  
  Do you have any idea what jars of teeth go for these days???
- Bro eating good tonight

Expert mode is the tongs that were locked closed when they went into the drawer, and have now expanded 3x the size they should be
- That's the entire reason I use a wine bucket to house big utensils. I used a wide thin grill spatula and all of my patience opening that drawer.
  The bucket is slightly bigger around and slightly taller than a cookie jar. It works great.
  
  We use a combination of a tall vase for the big top heavy stuff and an old Jaegermeister ice bucket that came free with something decades ago. Nestled within each other. Holds all of the bigger cooking utensils like spatulas, spoons, tongs, etc.
  
  It used to work great in the old days. Now every utensil needs to have a bulky handle, and I’ve accumulated too many, so there’s just no room in that bucket
- use another set of tongs to squeeze them shut while pulling
  
  Look at money man over here. Showing off his two tongs.

Why is it, when something stucks, it is always you three?
- Ty be fair, sometimes it's the upside-down spatula.
- I’ve been wondering the same thing profesor.

you'd think i'd have learned by now not to put my potato masher in the drawer. but you'd be wrong if you thought that.
- That's uncanny. I thought I was the only one misplacing my German stick grenades like that.
  
  Please refer to them by their proper german name stikkenboomens.
  
  Dang I can't un-see that now. Its like the FedEx arrow.

Don't forget the tongs that's missing the lock thing and somehow ends up standing up wide open.
I threw an entire draw of utensils across the room because of one of those fuckers.
- don't do that. dm me but don't do that

Mine is pineapple corer and unnecessarily large can opener

Praise Anoia

One of ours gets stuck on the 3 different sets of measuring cups. Why do we have 3 full sets? No one knows!
- Because eventually you'll break it lose one of the cups and then have 3 incomplete sets that will hopefully provide a full set between them.
- Because having one means you have to wash that pile of dishes at the bottom of the sink.

I don't think "audio off" was ever a reason.

Ineffective ass potato masher.
- What would you recommend for mashing ass-potatoes?
  
  For ass potatoes you need a ricer.
  
  The professionals use a potato ricer. Very fast, no lumps, and no risk of accidently making a glue, but you have to buy a potato rice, and change is scary.
  
  Have you heard about our Lord and Savior the poop knife?
  
  Hand mixer, like a true redneck
- A ricer is the 'Yes chef' way to do it, but I use this exact masher, when I do it I get lumpy mashed potatoes, but for whatever reason why my 10yr uses it they are silky smooth.

And how else would you suggest we pay tribute to Anoia?
- Anoia is on Mastodon.
  Rattle those drawers and praise her.
- PRAISE ANOIA!
  Oh merciful Anoia, guard our kitchens and protect our drawers!

Forgot the upside down spatula.

A fuckin set of tongs that has some latching mechanism that doesn’t work so they stay permanently agape.

If it wasn’t so true

This really grates my cheese

I simply don't put these in a drawer.

it got in it can get out

Mine is a collection of antique dental instruments.
I won't tell you why, but I will say that it puts the lotion on its skin.

For me it's usually letting anyone else put dishes away. Before that, the ¼, ½, ⅓, and 1 cup measure set but I fixed it by putting them upside down.

C'mon man. You forgot half a dozen mismatched batteries, some tongs, and 3 different bottle openers for some reason.

This post has made me ask, why don't we just put this shit in a different place?
- Kitchen is to small

Burger patty press still in the cardboard

YOU CANNOT HIDE FROM THE POTATO MASHA!

I have this one drawer that always hits something
potato masher
large pizza cutter
basting brush with an annoying hook on the side
- For me it's tongs.

The spatula is a classic one

What is the purpose of the squiggly one?
- Mashing potatoes
  
  The hard way. Use the egg beaters (aka hand mixer) instead.
- Human agony and self torture
  
  CPT
- Potato masher
  
  Not just A potato masher, its THE potato masher. If you dont have that thick af metal wire one you have an inferior potato masher.

a knife once got stuck in out kitchen drawer.
after an hour of trying to get that drawer open with an arsenal of tools we surrendered and smashed a hole in the drawer from below.
The new ceramic knifes which caused the incident were collateral damage.
- Oh man, that’s why that drawer was so spiteful - it took its revenge out on my mother-in-law. Apparently it reincarnated as a bathroom drawer and schemed with the cat to close the bathroom door and open the drawer right next to it
  I tried to help but it was too tight to even snake a wire hanger through. I ended up smashing a hole in the bathroom door
  
  Doors can be replaced, dignity cannot.

😤😂

You could just buy a utensil crock and never have to worry about it again.
Also box graters go in a cabinet, if you don't have cabinet space and need to keep it in a drawer then get a flat grater (it's not like you use the other sides of the box grater anyway).

Can opener
- cannot opener

Mine is measuring cups that stack weird.
- Found the American :)
  
  Do measuring cups not exist outside of America?
  
  So what? I also have a scale which is in no way better than using a measuring cup.
- Why the hell are they in the same drawer?

For me it’s the bakery gloves
- What are bakery gloves? I've never heard of that before, and Google was not helpful.
  
  Oven mitts
- Literally had this 15 mins ago

That fucking potato masher. My fiancee uses one of these. Just use the damned egg beaters! The machine packs away easy and the mashed potatoes are super light and fluffy.
- I'm not sure what kind of eggbeaters would survive smashing potatoes, but I'll live in fear of them from now on.

hahahahhahahahahahahhaaahhaahhaha amazing

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