True dat

Because I'm fat and ugly. I don't want to see it and trust me you don't want to see it either.

It's all about attitude.

I got a belly and I get a lot of positive attention when I rock a crop top.
- It's it from other men applauding you?
i used to feel like that until i discovered the chub and bear crowds.

now i show off my hairy moobs; my low hanging belly; and my back boobs every chance i get when the sun is out.
- stop describing yourself, I’m at WORK! eggplant

I remember something about them being hunted to extinction

Understanding dryer settings.

Aside from my slab o'flab making people wish my top had not been cropped, those daddy dukes look like junk-crunchers.

Girl, step into any sports themed gay bar. We are still dressing like this.

How does one find a sports themed gay bar? Asking for a friend.
- Hang out with a gay rugby team, they’ll show you
- they're a majority; just go to any city in a red or purple state.

Because I'd look like this:

I just realized that the examples in the meme leave out an important part of the ensemble: calf-high white tube socks with multicolor bands at the top.

If you're gonna rock it, rock it all the way.

I don't have those, so that. That stops me from doing that.

We grew up watching those dudes get butchered in increasingly-grotesque ways by a diverse conglomeration of psychotic murderers and animals, both natural and supernatural.

I'm good with my plain black t-shirt that's long enough to serve as a dress because I'm fat and need uberlength shirts to make it over the curvature of my Moo Deng pregnancy and still have enough fabric left over to not leave me looking like I'm wearing a cummerbund made from pale hairy human skin.

Fat guy dress > being split vertically, starting at the willy, by an industrial saw because I unknowingly spent a summer afternoon in a swimming hole that once hosted a cruel gang of teenagers who pretended to befriend a lonely man with a deformity and subsequently caused him to drown in it by shoving him off the rocks into the water even though they knew he couldn't swim.

We live in a society.

I work IT in a construction yard and dont like the oil and slurry shit getting on my thighs when I have to fix the internet in the wash bay. Weekends are fair game but I'm a twink not a hunk so the pull off is different.

What exactly do you do on the job? I'm more curious than anything. Doing fiber/Ethernet runs?
- This is a special case cause no one listens to me and I document that not listening. But the fuel island terminal needs a wired connection, wireless solutions do not play well. So my company ignores me and buys wireless connectors. They go down. Instead of trenching and running a cable like I tell them, they've bought hundreds of feet of Ethernet and every time a truck runs over the Ethernet cable to the fuel island I run out there and make a new one to run. It happens once a week.

Fat

Because those hunks never survived the movie.

I don't have a younger sister I have to share clothes with.

My fragile masculinity 😔

Lotta people here have some body dismorphia

It does seem like short shorts are coming back.

They are back! We’ll see for how long.

Beer belly

And my sagging balls.
- Eh, just throw them over your shoulder and you're good to go.
I don't drink or eat a lot of carbs, I am trim and lean. But I still wouldn't dress like that simply because bare midriff doesn't look good on men unless you're fully trying to imitate the 80's movie aesthetic for laughs.

Dad bod.

Joke's on you - we're all into that nowadays.
How are you gonna show off your sweet dad bod with out a crop top?

I don't want to look at my disgusting flesh-body and I'd rather nobody else saw it either. Rebuild me shiny and chrome, then we'll talk about showing off.

Rebuild me shiny and chrome

Steel and circuits will make you whole.

No way, this is like wearing the red shirt in Star Trek.

I mean, my big fat body, mostly.

There are a lot of women that love fat guys. Ignoring the haters and wearing what you like is hot AF.

I'm gay, but if I were straight I would be with a fat guy over any other guy, 100%.

High fructose corn syrup

Personal dignity?

Can buy mine for three bucks.

Exercise

I dress like this in the summer as a nonbinary person

I don’t want to disappoint gay guys.

Gents, this is not for you; it’s for her. 🙂

if i dressed like that, she would probably injure herself laughing.

not being a hunk, for starters... but also it looks uncomfortable

My wife.

Your wife is the opposite of mine. She's always trying to get me to wear tighter, skimpier clothing. I'm a product of the 90s; I like my oversized t-shirts and baggy jeans, okay?
- She's fine with tighter shirts, but those hot-pants? Nah, she hates them and threatens to cut them into pieces when I talk about buying a pair, even though they look so comfortable.

Being the first or second victim is a pretty good disincentive

I'm from the 80's and nobody wants to see someone my age dressed like that.

I have also traveled here from the 80's and I'm here to tell you one thing:

That sounds like their fucking problem. If that's all that is stopping you then you get your tiny gym shorts and crop top, friend.
Ugh true :(

Because it’s considered “lewd” and “indecent” when I do it and I’m not allowed within 500 yards of schools anymore.

All those pockets too small to carry a phone.

Thankfully, other men.

Self-respect mostly (at least what's left of it).

I'm still traumatized by spandex being a thing when I was in primary school.

Gym was .... embarrassing.

I recently got a one shoulder top that I'm wearing at home, does that count?

I like vaginas and having the opportunity to see one every now and then.

Were any women involved in this? Seems like the industry was full of older white men making all of the decisions back then.

Do you find a beer gut sexy? How about Dad Bod?

I don't want to show anyone up

My fear of getting arrested for disturbing the public peace.

Every single men's top I've seen are too big...

Sheer sex appeal

Because eww, I don’t want to

I don't want to be killed off like them?

Because our bodies are gross and threatening.

It's too cold where I live

The middle one (at least) is from Sleepaway Camp. Terrifying ending.

The "Fire Island gay" look is not for me. (Aka Midriff-baring T-shirts and Nut-Hugger shorts.)

I love that they have a belt. Like, you gotta put your belt on even with cut-offs.

I could dress like that... for money.

I’m tall and thin so my clothes do look like that

It’s really uncomfortable

Misses says my T-shirt tan ruins the look, not the dad bod ❤️

I kinda dress like this in casual situations, no cropped shirt though. But I'm considering making one out from an older shirt.

I'm not old enough =(

Same thing as the last time this was reposted. Didn't change in a few months.

You know, maybe I could have changed that in the last few months. Eaten better, exercised more. I guess the truth is I wasn't expecting this repost.