4mo ago

. . .

146 comments

If you don't feel like eating the crust, you're having a shitty pizza.
- Agreed. Just crushed a pizza and the crust was awesomely good
  
  Unless you're trying to maximize protein to carb ratio when eating a pizza (if your top priorityis to eat the pizza). But then, are you really eating a pizza if you don't eat the crust?
  
  Marcos is where it's at.
  People like to shit on little sneazers too but they're pizza is made from the shame shit as their crazy bread.
  Also all crust tastes fire when dipped in a vat of garlic butter.
- But I like the cheese and topping part a lot more so way eat extra calories?
  Alternatively...
  🥺
  👉👈
  Make me?
  
  Apparently you've been eating substandard pizza, because really good pizza crust is a delight unto itself.
  However if you insist you only like the toppings, you have 2 choices:
  Find a life partner who loves crust.
  Just bake the toppings in/on a sheet pan and eat them directly from it, without crust.
- Even when our dough is off, it's oiled and garlicked. I find it hard to argue with the garlic.

Fuck that.
You're a grown ass adult, eat whatever you want
If you don't like the taste of crust and have enough money that you don't need to make use of every piece of food, then don't eat the crust.
If you don't like the taste of crust but think it has some benefit, then eat the crust.
If you don't like the taste of crust but are broke and want to eat the crust to feel full so you can spend more money on other stuff, then eat the crust.
If you like the taste of crust but want to save the crusts to make an art piece out of them, then don't eat the crust.
YOU'RE AN ADULT, YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT, DON'T LET SOCIETY PRESSURE YOU TO DO OTHERWISE
- Counterpoint: Society should be pressuring people not to increase food waste just because they can afford throw stuff away for no reason.
  
  People throwing away crust isn't even a grain of sand in the ocean of food waste. But as stated in my original comment, you can choose to eat the crust if that feels important to you. And even though you would be wrong for pressuring other people to eat crusts, the other person should do whatever the fuck they want despite your pressuring
  
  If you eat food just because you "Don't want to waste it", you become the wastebin.
  I'll mail the leftover crusts to "children in Africa", maybe that will solve the world hunger.
- I really appreciate the menu of options available
- Proper bread is a very very basic acquired taste. It's something you should've acquired in your teens latest. If you don't like crust, it's because you mother was helicopter parenting and cutting off crust from your sandwiches.
  I swear that the best burger in town, the best sandwich in town, the best pizza in town and the best breakfast bread are all because of the crust.
  Not even attempting to eat it is a lack of experience. Or a lack of good bakeries or burger, pizzaand sandwich stores.
  I'm telling you that you're missing out here. It's not a fucking choice. You don't know what you're missing until you've had a proper crust. Cutting it off is like, yeah sure there are bad crust and all, but you're only eating the less important part of the meal to begin with. How can you even judge the food without the crust?
- Replying to my own comment with this relevant comic
  https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fpreview.redd.it%2F7qn3qp40vm471.png%3Fwidth%3D1080%26crop%3Dsmart%26auto%3Dwebp%26s%3D7e4ff989811990f847b253e43c7ba65d3dfc91a7

people throw away the crust? is this an American thing?
- Not enough corn syrup on that bit.
  
  i think they just love wasting food at this point.
- It can be surprisingly difficult to get good crust in the US. But I can understand not always wanting to eat the crust in America because some pizzarias just don't care enough to make a good dough.
- Spoiled kids, mostly. I grew up broke and we had to eat everything we were given, or go hungry. But a lot of the kids I grew up around were much better off financially and could afford to not eat the parts they disliked.

Throwing away the crust is just wasting food.

You clearly forgot to order your pizza with cheese-filled crust
- I tried that once. Didn't even taste much better. And now I'm vegan so unless its mock cheese I'll never have a chance to try it again.
  
  That's sad. It's the best thing that has ever been invented

Being a grown ass man means you dont have to

But my dog expects the crust. I'd never let him down
- Lucky, my dog is gluten intolerant. It's not fun cleaning out his fur.
  
  You aren't supposed to knead the pizza dough on your dog bro. Imagine all the hair in your pizza.
  🍕
  🐕

Born and raised in us never understood it I eat the crust unless the it has the consistency of charcoal

Ah yes, I'm a grown-ass adult and I take orders from a meme.
- The US political system in a nutshell 😂😅🥲😭
  
  Solution: 🌬 💨 😶‍🌫️ 😵‍💫 🥴 😬 🤫 😅 🥱 😴

But my dog loves the crust and I don't so when I get pizza he gets really happy
Why should I take that away from him lol

You eat the base of the pizza there? That's crazy. It's like eating a paper plate. You are supposed to eat only the topping. Next you're gonna say you eat the bread that wraps your sandwiches.

Is this about my husband? 😉
- If your husband has a cheesy crust, wash under his foreskin
  
  you might find a bean or two in there. add them to the jar
- Possibly. Is your husband an ass man?

The crust is(most of the tine) the best part of the pizza. I sometimes only eat the crust
- No its not. Why would i want to eat a piece of boring bread, when there is a combination of thats same bread, cheese, tomato, and what ever toppings i choose.
  Saying "Crust is the beat part" is just dumb and blatantly non-sensical when you look at pizza as a whole.
  
  Some places/people are really good at making a good crust. Then you're not eating boring bread, but really good bread. And who doesn't love good bread.
  
  Why so angry
  
  But what if my favorite part is the boring bread? The combination doesnt add to the taste, it just changes the taste so if i prefer the bread over the tomato, cheese and toppings, the combination will just make the taste worse
  Also, for context, i often eat an entire loaf of bread without anything else
  
  I disagree and you are wrong. Plus you're lacking in intellectual prowess.

You are mistaken, I am a grown ass-man.
- Proctologist?

Protip: leave some cheese near the crust and eat the crust lengthwise. Tada! You got cheesy bread.

How to eat crust
Method 1: Finish main portion of slice, then raw dog crust
Method 2: Finish main portion of slice, then dip in preferred sauce or orifice.
Method 3: Puree entire slice and insert into mouth hole via straw or funnel.
Method 4: Roll pizza slice around crust, creating a Swiss Pizza Roll. slice into wheels 1/4-1/2" thick width. Use 4 Pizza Wheels, several toothpicks, and one additional slice of pizza to create a PizzaMobile. Race your friends or pet or imaginary friend to see who can make the fastest PizzaMobile!
Method 5: Throw crust in the trash can and stare at it for 5-10 minutes. Glare loathingly at it; make it understand exactly how disgusted you are by its lack of sauce, cheese, and toppings. What a piece of shit.......................
- Method 6: Get a good New York style slice and you won't even think about it being crust.

I'm a grown ass man. I'll eat or don't eat what i damn well please.

When I was in grade school, I used to only eat the crust. I hated the center part with its tomatoes and cheese and stuff.
- Oh, you mean the pizza. You hated the pizza. You liked bread.
- Young you would've absolutely loved bread

"We're now live at Mr Plohmann's who's voluntarily eaten nothing but pizza crust for four years."
"I never said 'voluntarily'!"
"You still eating that?"
- That's notfunny

Agree.

I make my own pizza, and I always put stuff on the crust to make it interesting to eat in its own right. Usually I alternate little chunks of himalayan sea salt, roasted garlic, and black garlic every inch or so around the outside. Makes it into a sort of weird but tasty pretzel.
I have tried making stuffed crust pizza by folding the outside edge back over some cheese, but it always opens up while cooking in the oven. I don't know what the secret is to that shit. Maybe I should use staples?
- Keep the seal clear of toppings and sauce, and use water to stick the crust to the base. Wet flour is a great glue, tomato sauce and cheese are not.
- When I make my own pizza I use the spare sauce as a dip. Bit of olive oil and fresh basil over the whole thing makes the crust pretty much as nice as the rest.
  Also for the stuffed I think you have to do more of a burrito roll type thing so that the edge is trapped by the weight of the stuffing.
- I like to do new Haven style pies. With those there isn't much crust in the first place, so I try to spread the sauce as close to the edge as I can

And wash the tablet down with water. You don’t need chewy ones.

My method is to eat the crust first save for a tiny handle, making it an appetizer. It tastes best when I'm hungriest, before proceeding with the cheesy, greasy main course.

I always thought, the crust is why they give a dipping sauce with pizza. At least that's the reason I make garlic sauce when I make pizza.

I used to eat the crust but now as an older human the bread shreds my insides and I've noticed that not eating it helps.

and you're a selectively bred dog subject to the whims of the human subjectiveness of cuteness. Jokes on you stupid talking dog.

I love the crust. But sometimes I don't need the extra carbs.

Pro tip: Put honey on the crust so you get dessert too.

But then what will my dog get?
- Dedicated pizza

I always eat the crust that I didn't actually touch. There's this local wood-firing joint that always does the charring so well.
- I'm confused. You don't eat crust you've touched?
  
  I have germophobia.

"Crust" makes it sound like superfluous detritus. It's cornicione! Pizza is mostly bread, so if the bread is bad then it's not worth eating.
Neapolitan pizza has a high hydration dough cooked at very high temp, resulting in a delightfully light cornicione filled with large air pockets. The bread is delicious enough to enjoy on its own, which is why it only needs simple toppings like uncooked San Marzano tomato and a few shreds of mozarella. IMO Italian cuisine excels at allowing high quality produce speak for themselves through its simplicity and elegance. What they're shitting out at Papa Johns and whatever is an abomination.

yes
- i dont care if y'all downvote me, i'm ALWAYS eating the crust!

Picky people, i will never get them and thats my luck.

A real adult knows not to eat empty carbs.
- If you're already eating pizza then you're not really worried about carb intake.
  
  What is portion control anyway?
- Yeah. There's nothing wrong with the crust, but if you're going to blow your carb budget on a pizza at least keep the pleasure:carb ratio as high as possible.
  
  As mentioned above: if the crust is not delicious you’re eating a bad pizza
- Empty carbs in moderation are fine, it's not like they're poisonous or anything.
  
  It sure is!
  I'm just disagreeing with the idea that eating every part of prepared food is some kind of obligation.
- I used to think like the OP/image, but now I'm in your camp. You should absolutely eat things you don't enjoy if they are good for you. But bad pizza crust is just punishing your mouth while gaining weight.
  I understand the food waste argument, but it's wasted whether you eat it or not. You're wasting just as much if you don't eat the peel of the banana.

Niah

I will die before I eat that crust!
EDIT: Wow, y'all are opinionated about a joke response to a meme post. Sorry, I guess...
- you entitled POS

No. I will not eat the handles. Why waste my appetite on dry bread?

146 comments