What actually happened.

Russia went from being the second best military in the world, to being the second best militarily in Ukraine, to being the second best military in Russia.
- Russia turned out to be world's best paper tiger
  
  That's probably still China, lots of money invested but their actual combat movements look horrific. Their special forces are legit very good though.
- second best military in the world
  On paper, at least...
- Then they'll become the second best military in Ukraine after being annexed.
  
  Second best military in West Alaska*
- Aren't they third in Russia? Wagner is definitely above them.
  
  Wagner is only as independent as Putin allows

Red Alert 2 Chronosphere
The Chronosphere was a mass teleportation device developed by the Allies during the Second World War. An improved version was used to decisively end the Third World War and was used further until the end of the Psychic Dominator Disaster. Albert Einstein was a notable contributor to the Chronosphere's design.
Good times.
- Albert Einstein was a notable contributor to the Chronosphere’s design.
  "You know vat would be sick? Ein grosse Plasmakugel. Cover up how boring ze solid-state temporal destabilizers look. Vonderful efficiency, but mein Gott, have some showmanship."
  
  The starting cinematic of Einstein killing Hitler made the game awesome.

You like pondering orbs, don’t you?
- Where can I find this? Preferably metal (radioactiveness optional) or maybe a file for 3d printable?
  
  I don’t know where to get the 3d model, I just have this picture, but here is some Cobalt 60 I found!
  
  It's definitely a print, from the striations. Here's one popular model.
  
  Dont know about buying one, but you could probably make one with some clay, a box, two rubber balls of slightly diffent sizes, some aluminum cans, and a cast iron pan.
- I'll gladly ponder my chronosphere.
- Such a spicy orb
  
  How would it taste?
- That the "demon core"? If so, don't remove the keychain.

Don't hit me back after I hit you. After I hit you repeatedly. And after I killed your families. And after I destroyed your infrastructure and mined your country.
Don't hit me back. Please.
- Russia could end the war today by just leaving.
  
  I mean yeah you can say it's just a proxy war, but if a large nation supporting a small nation during a time of war makes it a proxy war, then the American Revolution was a proxy war between Britain and France. Proxy wars can still be liberatory, just like this one, where Ukraine is literally fighting for it's freedom and survival.

Russia is too big to just call it West Alaska. You'll need to divide it up a little. You'll need: New Karelia, East Poland, North Ukraine, and West Alaska.
- Lets just redraw the borders to 1444 a la EU4

Thank fuck I'm in the timeline where Tim Curry isn't a Russian general.

Otherwise we could escape to the one place that isn't corrupted by capitalism:

    
     _______..______      ___       __    ______  _______  __  
    /       ||   _  \    /   \     |  |  /      ||   ____||  | 
   |   (----`|  |_)  |  /  ^  \    |  | |  ,----'|  |__   |  | 
    \   \    |   ___/  /  /_\  \   |  | |  |     |   __|  |  | 
.----)   |   |  |     /  _____  \  |  | |  `----.|  |____ |__| 
|_______/    | _|    /__/     \__\ |__|  \______||_______|(__)

i would fuck with west alaska ngl.

If Russia had Kirovs we would all be speaking Russian

Tools.