5 Moves to Rulemate
5 Moves to Rulemate
45 comments
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First of all: That's not how you play chess (left image).
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The "error" is designed to boost engagement, which makes the post more visible on social media.
And it works. -
It’s not how YOU play chess. 😂
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Chaos. 💣
This is merely a small step towards the heat death of the universe, but a big one from humanity.
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But it is a double checkmate, which is pretty rare.
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Do you have a vibrator in your butt?
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"you're getting mated"
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Nuh-uh! You touched it, so now you have to follow through. We're playing tournament rules.
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Ah, a fellow competitive sex enjoyer
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My sexual ELO is listed in bold on my Tinder profile.
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“That move has left me wide open”
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"I see you've played the Frenchman's cumsock"
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“I’ll shove a bishop in my ass”
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I'll be black this time.
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"This isn't my favorite starting position, but I'll see if I can maneuver things to get better leverage."
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"I normally do this by myself. It's nice to have a partner."
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Google it.
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Holy hell!
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That's exactly how I like my anal beads
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White knight takes black queen.
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Holy hell
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You can say anything you fucking want in either context.
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i'm going to grin and say checkmate the next time my bf and i
and i'm going to moan and say i'm cumming the next time i'm about to either beat someone or lose to someone in chess
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Who can last five minutes in bed?! That's a ridiculously high standard.
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It says 5 moves, which could average 10 seconds or less per move if it's speed
chesssex, so a much more realistic standard.
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Excuse me, that is an illegal move.
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As long as it's not an illegal sex
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In Polish you can say, sometimes You're pushing a Queen, sometimes You're beating a horse, which are coloquialisms for having sex and masturbating.
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The English phrase "beating a dead horse" must be fantastic knowledge for Polish schoolboys.
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There's no way you came up with that move yourself, you're cheating!
Pretty by-the-book so far, let's get interesting.
That's not fast enough to get a promotion.
Go ahead, take me. See what happens.
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There's a lot of things you could say there, they would just result in your expulsion from the chess club.
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"..shit, I forgot about the bishop"
"Wow, the king really IS useless! Good thing the queen is so versatile"
"Hey! No butt help!"
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J'adoube!
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Complete silence except for the odd quietly muttered 'adjust', and the rhythmic sound of a c(l)ock being slapped.
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Patience, please, while I consider my next move.
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"What I'm about to do is a pro-gamer move"
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Nice breasts
45 comments