1y ago

Let's confuse Americans!

176 comments

Bruh, mark your cum jug NSFW, we're not confused. Everyone has a cum jug.
- Wait ... what?
  I've just been using a box this whole time!
  
  Reddit is leaking
- Images, that you can smell
  
  *taste

I'm a hot blooded American and I can recognize a delicious pitcher of horse semen any day of the week.
- Username checks out

Wait where's the bag?
- As an American, I too need to know where the bag went
  
  As an American, I believe the bag is still attached to the rest of the cow.

And infuriate Canadians.
- Yeah I hate this guy
  
  Is that Steve? Fuck that guy!
  
  OP loves you.

Do y'all think we don't have cum pitchers in the US? I know we're bad, but we're not savages.
- I was going to say, I keep one by my desk, topped off for the dog every day. Is this supposed to be confusing?
  
  I regret that there ever was a 6th day.
- Homestuck detected.

Thats a lotta cum buddy
- You could fit so many ponies in that bad boy

Why do you have milk in your hospital piss jug?
- Improves the flavor
  
  Of the piss, or the milk?
- What do I do if I fill the jug but I still have piss? Do I ask the nurse for another?
  
  You chug.

Not American, what is this?
- I think in America, they sell milk in soft plastic bags to be cut open, so you have to put them in these jugs for stability and handling.
  
  That's Canada
  
  They do that in Canada. The US sells milk in plastic jugs or cardboard cartons.
  
  They definitely don't do this in america, tf
  
  Ummm. What?
  
  I used to work in a kitchen of a well-known chain pub in the UK and our mill came in in bags. Saved on alot of waste as we only needed one plastic jug and the bags used significantly less plastic than bottles of milk.
  
  that sounds so fucking stupid
  
  We had that in Europe too, but I don't see these anymore.
  
  I’ve never once seen milk sold in a bag

This truly is a shit post. Confuses everyone because it doesn't actually confuse anyone.
Tbh I think I understand what the joke is supposed to be (Canadians and bagged milk), but it's just a pitcher of milk and it would seem that no one's actually weirded out by it because of that.
- Not just Canadians, lots of South American countries do the same.
- I was confused because i kept seeing bagged milked in the comments but in hungary we have it but the bag is cunstructed in a way that you can use it to pour.
- That's not how you serve milk from a bag. The bag itself goes in the pitcher, and then you cut a corner and pour straight out of the bag.
  
  Why though? Why not just pour it in?

This must be one of those bidets I keep hearing so much about.
- Cum bidet

I hope you don't throw away the bag and keep your milk like that.

Everyone's confused buddy.

For those who are wondering, Americans store glue in this kind of jug. /s
- It just tastes better this way, non-americans just don't get it
- You are over the age of 40.

Is it because it doesn't have high fructose corn syrup in it?
- No, it is because it is not a gun.

Did you get that from your milk faucet?

The only thing I'm confused by is that you thought this would confuse us...

I am 40 and Canadian and have lived in three provinces (Alberta, Saskatchewan, and Ontario). I have never seen bagged fucking milk.
- Head East, I grew on bag milk
- Strange. Literally every grocery store in Ontario for decades including many convenience stores sell bagged milk.
- It's Ontario.
- Quebec here, 4L in 3 bags. Always has been... Honestly didn't know it wasn't common elsewhere in Canada. TIL
- Albertan here. When I was a kid my grandma always had bagged milk, but it got phased out in the 90s and I haven’t seen it in forever.
- I've only ever seen bagged milk once, somewhere in Ukraine many years ago
- Where did you live in Ontario? I've never seen anything but bagged milk here.
  
  Near Kingston! Maybe I just wasn't paying attention?
- I saw it quite often when I lived in Quebec but only for 3L or bigger containers

Partially-confused American here.. Why isn't it in a bag still?
Do y'all pour it out of the bag so you have more chances to catch an infection or so it goes bad faster?
- Lol love this thread with so many people confidently incorrect. It's not common to come in bags but not the norm. Also... Yeah why isn't it still in the bag.
  
  come in bags
  that's dehumanizing and just rude.
  
  Because it's an epic prank on those that don't know it's supposed to still be in the bag.
- a bag? what savages don't use a box or a glass?
- It’s a joke
  Referring to Canadians as Americans and then doing the milk thing wrong

Let's show our abomination to Americans (and Western Canadians)
Yall over in Ontario are weird lol
Sincerely, a British Columbian
- Nobody actually does what's in the picture

It's a pitcher of a picture of milk, what's not to get?

All I can think of when I see this is the bigger bag, that had like 3 or 4 1L bags of milk in it that this one time fell out of their grocery bag in my parents car and 2 of the bag got sliced open. The smell never left the car despite major efforts to clean up. I hazard to guess this is a big reason they no longer come in bags, but I hear maybe they still too in central Canada. Not here in the west.
- They absolutely never stopped selling them in bags in Ontario
- I hated that scary moment when the big bag of milk bags fell open unexpectedly.
  The tension that I'd feel after dropping the bags was immense. It was like time slowed while waiting to see if one of them would burst. It was freakier when one of the falling bags bounced off the floor. Fun times.

People in this comment section:
I'm not confused
Same people in this comment section:
what an oddly shaped milk jug

Why'd you take the bag out though?
- Colin Robinson voice To annoy you.

Chilean here and I do not know what am I looking at...
- Some parts of Canada dispense milk in bags. It comes in a plastic bladder that you pop inside this pitcher and cut the corner off to pour. This shitpost is pretending that we pour the milk into the pitcher directly and store it uncovered.
  For yr reference: https://www.cbc.ca/radio/costofliving/we-answer-your-burning-questions-about-things-like-milk-bags-tariffs-condo-insurance-and-printer-cartridges-1.5409407/here-s-why-milk-comes-in-bags-in-parts-of-canada-1.5409420
  
  American here. I can't speak for all Americans, but I think it's weird that you leave it in the bag, in the pitcher. Why not just pour it out of the bag, into a pitcher that has its own lid?
  
  canada is a savage land
  
  I was gonna ask where the bag was

I'm Canada, milk comes in bags. This could also be powdered milk.
- Hi Canada, I'm Dad!
  
  Hi Dad, I'm Dad!
- You drink powdered milk? We pretty much only use it in baking. It tastes off. Do you do something to make it more palatable?
  
  The trick is to make it with milk instead of water.
  
  The real trick is to start giving it to your kids when they are really young and never give them real milk. That way powdered milk tastes normal and real milk tastes weird to them. Or at least that's what my parents tried to do.
  
  You can't drink powdered milk, you gotta eat it
- Hey! Don’t speak for all of Canada! Milk comes in containers on the west coast, just as the universe intended.
- That's not entirely true. BC does plastic jugs, I had no idea milk came in bags out east til I went to visit family.
  
  Yes I see never seen them in BC. I think Alberta in the 80s is the first place I saw them as a kid. It was trippy as milk was in cartons or cans (Pacific Condensed Milk) but never bags. I found it messy...

Me, non-American: what?

I know this. It’s a British microwave
- They call them zappy zap sizzle cooks.

The shape of this pitcher bothers me for some reason but it certainly doesn’t confuse me.

I'm not confused at all. That's clearly a Franklehorn Maximatronic Lingovizer.
- Exactly.

This is why you don't skip tutorials

Pretty sure this will confuse Americans and enrage Canadians.

One liter of milk
- What's a liter?
  
  A metric quart

I enjoy the amount of people coming into a literal shitpost to complain about the accuracy of the post.
- You know I really made a good post then!

its SEMEN... SEMINAL FLUID! SPERM!!

Confused milk noises

YAY!! Soy milk!
- Hola, Milk! Yo soy Papá 🖐️

i know a pot of tea when i see one

Why's there milk in your kool-aid jug?
- Kool-aid? That's the margarita jug!

Hey sweet! Melted ice cream!

@stamets@startrek.website Make this stop!
- The only reason I haven't commented in this thread is because everyone else has said what i've been thinking. That while this is confusing Americans, it's equally as confusing to Canadians. Who the fuck does that?!

These personal urinals are great for when you have a big family and only one bathroom but you should really have a lid on it to contain the pee until it can be dumped in the toilet.
- Also see a doctor soon.

Well, how else do you store orchata?

176 comments