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  • Feeling super depressed atm. Getting my second face surgery on the 6th and feel like I have no hope for being desirable as a 200lb woman. I've been compulsively eating again at work and haven't been able to do intermittent fasting like I was doing to be able to lose 20lbs.

    • Oh girl! I'm so sorry to hear that. I wish I had some advice, but I'm still trying to figure it out for myself. I was trying to bulk, but now 🤷‍♀️

      Im pre anything and still boymode nearly 100% but I'm rooting for you and wish the best!

    • Surgery is an extremely stressful thing! Feeling anxious about it is normal!

      One thing that might help with with binging is packing absurd amounts of veggies as snacks. At one point my wife was bringing two pounds of green bell peppers to work every day so she could stress eat them. She started by just bringing fewer regular snacks, slowly replacing them with bell peppers until it was all peppers. That really helped her feel more in control and not guilty at all.

      The other one was eating at least two cups of dark green veggies before every meal. She could still eat as much as she wanted, but she had to figure out a way to make the first two cups of food be dark green veggies like: bell peppers, broccoli, spinach, Brussels sprouts, etc. They didn't have to be raw either (raw dark green veggies often gives people gas) so she'd roast them with salt and oil so they were delicious. That way she was getting tons of fiber and vitamins, so she just felt better and had more energy to face life's stresses. That extra fiber also helps with blood sugar.

      The trick is giving yourself permission to undo long habits and know that they often take as long to undo as they took to form.

      If today was 1% better than yesterday, that's a win. Do it again tomorrow, and then the next day. You'll be making big changes in months and it won't be a big shock to the body and mind.

      For myself, I was almost 200lb, and I eventually got down to 140lb, but it took years. All the tricks like keto, IF, IIFYM, etc were fine and helped, but ultimately what took a long time was changing my emotional relationship with food before I could stop binging. That took a long time. What finally helped a lot was just writing down everything I ate every day. I'd also use a CBT trick and write down for each meal how I was feeling emotionally. It is tedious, but it eventually helped my mind realize how much I was using food to fill an emotional hole. That still took about a year. So while some people can just decide to lose weight and do it, I first had to let go of that as an emotional crutch. And that was not as easy. But it was so worth the time and effort! It might take a long time to break that habit, but you can do it, and you won't regret it!

      You got this girl, I'm rooting for you!

    • Woah. Take it easy on yourself, that's a lot to manage! You're going above and beyond right now.

  • How's this for conversation?

    I feel a lot silly here because I do t remember being (allowed?) into feminine as a kid or (necessarily) into feminine things. But, do I like being a cis-male 🤔😑 not 100%bso 😓

27 comments