2w ago

Discussion Thread ⛵ Wednesday 28 May 2025

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So over the weekend Mr P and I formally broke up. First there was an argument where a ramekin was thrown, then a calming down and proper conversation. We've been in separate bedrooms for years so not much is really changing. He initially asked me to leave. I said no, I've been paying rent for 13½ years to the owner of the property who isn't you. Neither of us can afford to move anywhere or pay market rent. Also with him on the dole, can't afford to pay for all car related expenses, which is needed with the children. I said I'm still happy to pay that stuff and I think he saw that it was a pretty good deal actually and he's best to eat humble pie and stick with it. It's in my interests for him to have a car to do child/school related things whilst I'm at work, and I'm happy to contribute to that. I told him (not for the first time) that he's welcome to see other people as long as discretion is exercised regarding the children. Since then things have been really civil between us. Let's see how it goes.
- I think you've made the right decision to be honest.
  
  Thankyou ❤️
- That sounds like a positive approach to a shitty situation.
  
  Thankyou, I'm hopeful that we can work our way through the "not working out" situation as peaceably as possible. Especially for Elder Minipeeler, who at first seemed pretty bummed out but is gradually realising that nothing is radically different.
  
  I think it's better to separate and be honest with kids that things change in people's lives, than to keep pretending. The social lies wear on kids, they're still developing and things subtly being wrong fucks them up I reckon. Do you guys have support networks where one of you could take off for a weekend leaving the other alone from time to time? Go stay with a parent or friend occasionally just to get/give each other some space?
  
  for reals, I grew up in a fighting house and the goddamn divorce (and this was in the 1980's, so social stigma wahoo) was a goddamn relief.
  I was five at the time.
  
  My mum tossed my piece of shit dad when I was 18 months old. She came home late from work to an empty house, with me alone crying for however long.
  
  Mr P has rural people he can stay with if needed. I don't want to leave the kids just at the moment. Also Mr P often spends the whole evening outside in his mancave smoking and watching movies so we're not exactly in each other's pockets as it is.
- It sucks that it was needed, but I trust that this will be the start of a happier life for you and the mini peelers
  
  Thankyou, I feel that way too 🙂
- Remember to take care of yourself! It's easy to get caught up in the kids, and Mr P, and just all the stress and difficult conversation, and you forget to care for yourself too! Treat yourself! Be it a cafe coffee, or a luxurious bath/shower, read your fave book/listen to your fav song, etc
  Breaking up is incrediblely hard on the soul, especially if you still have to live together, but you are strong, kind, clever, and AMAZING!
  YOU GOT THIS HOT STUFF!! 💜💜💜
  
  Thankyou ❤️
- It sucks that things worked out that way, but I'm glad he was able to be civil about it afterward and it seems like you'll be able to make things work how they are for the moment.
  
  Thankyou ❤️
- Hugs 🫂. I wish you and the kiddos all the best moving forward. ❤️
  
  Thankyou ❤️
- Man , bringing home other people sounds super awkward. But congrats for finally setting boundaries
  
  Thankyou ❤️ He won't be bringing them home, he'll be going out.
- I'm so sorry to hear.
  I hope you'll be able to work through it all in the best way possible for you and your family.
  
  Thankyou ❤️
- I'm so sorry.
  
  Thankyou ❤️ I'm ok
- I hope this goes as smoothly as you need it to
  
  Thankyou ❤️
- Late but big hugs. We love ya Peeler.
  
  Thanks mate 🙂
- Thats tough stuff Peeler, but you are certainly not alone in your feelings or situation. Hoping for a sense of peace and calm for you and your Mini Peelers.
  
  Thankyou ❤️
- Best of luck with it, I hope everything stays civil. It’s good to know he has relatives he can stay with if needed.
  Damn this housing market makes life awkward.
- Only up from here, Peeler ❤️
- So sorry to hear, such a difficult life event. Hopefully things can continue as amicably as possible, and when the dust settles the healing begins. It can take time, let your emotions take their course.

140 comments