The best means I've found of fighting against that impulse is remembering what the Internet was like for me in early 2017 - completely demented Hillary supporters all over the place blaming everyone and everything besides their godawful candidate for what had just happened
The moderate Democratic party members who could and should learn a lesson from seeing their crappy candidate and crappy ideology lose a totally winnable election will not learn a damn thing (actually, they'll probably double down even harder on all their idiotic crap and try to run like Michael Bloomberg or Joe Manchin or someone even worse), and everything will only get worse for the people we care about