2d ago

Are there any Lemmy/Mbin instances by women for women?

Reddit post

You're viewing a single thread.

363 comments

Youre absolutely welcome to join Blahaj zone. Our wonderful administration team (both of whom are women) bans misogyny whenever it comes around to our communities. The mods for our main communities share a very aggressive moderation policy.
- They also ban real users instead of the people literally calling their gender "dragonfucker" and "attack helicopter"
  There were a bunch of users who got angry about these users mocking gender expression and then when they told the trolls to fucking stop Ada banned them
  The blahaj admins are trolls
  
  I give Ada a lot of credit. In the early days, I had the following interaction:
  TOPIC: Something about sexual/gender preferences, I don't remember, asking people their preferences
  Me: responds with my preferences (I'm straight cis male, I like women so I'm down with post-transition trans women but pre-transition don't turn me on)
  Some random user: respectfully asks if I would be willing to date a pre-transition trans man
  Me: I guess, but it probably wouldn't work due to the fact that what I like about their body, they hate
  Some of those professionally offended people took a misleading screenshot of my response and started screaming about "chasers".
  Ada did an admin post to the community backing me up and calling those idiots out.
  So unless she's changed a lot, I don't think she's a troll. It would have been easy to go with the mob but she stuck up for me.
  
  Still could be TERFS.
  I don't have any deeper knowledge of that instance, just what I saw in all, so I don't want to put anything on them. That thought just came across reading your comment.
  I have made a mental remark in the past that the posts and users on this instance are better treated from afar, though.
  
  It's pretty harsh to just casually suggest that a person be a TERF without any specific evidence.
  
  They also turn a blind eye to misandry.
  
  You are part of the reason lemmy is unpopular with women.
  
  i dont understand, please explain further. if blahaj mods have ignored misandry, that would be a bad thing. hate is generally regarded as bad, and misandry is hatred of men. therefore, misandry should be generally regarded as bad.
  
  That's true on face value. The issue is that accusations of misandry are almost always unfounded, and only made as a way to deflect and to attack women. So when people start talking about misandry, that's generally a red flag.
  It's similar to how "all lives matter" is definitely a true and good value - but yet it is almost always said as a way to divert support away from vulnerable groups. So although the literal meaning is good, it is fair to assume that people saying it do not have good intentions.
  
  You are right, but what he is calling misandry is not misandry, and so many people like him think misandry is the bigger problem now.
  
  Misandry is a huge problem in the space.
  It's why I couldn't stand r/TwoXChromosomes anymore.
  The amount of people saying we should "kill all men" without being banned is insane, if someone typed the opposite they would instantly get dogpiled and removed.
  The blahaj admins have a record of supporting trolls and hateful people, just as long as they use the "right" language.
  
  I feel like the whole supporting trolls thing is overblown.
  They said that you should still use someone's pronouns, even if they are trolling, because it sets the precedent that its okay to ignore someone's pronoun preference.
  Unless there is more that I missed.
  
  This account was banned on the day they posted the announcement because I had the gall to say that I would not respect the users who used Neopronouns as a joke to invalidate real gender identities. (Dragonfucker and their friends who also showed up to do this)
  Ada insta banned me and all the dissenters from the instance, then she stalked some of us on other instances and messeged their admins to get us banned from those if we posted about what happened.
  She banned enough users that it affected the 196 community , and the flood of messages from their users who couldn't access 196 anymore is what caused moss to move it to .world in protest.
  They're hoping we all just forget and go away. But that place felt like my home after I left reddit, and now I see it's a malicious cess pool of people who want to hurt others like they were hurt, and now I'm a target, I'm an acceptable "other" to hate for dopamine.
  
  If women have to be misandristic, then I'm quite happy to exclude bigots
  
  Would you mind giving me some examples of the misandry? To see what you are talking about.
  
  The pronoun was just "drag". PJ is the one who kept calling them "dragonfucker". You can go read dragonriders comments instead of just repeating gossip.
  
  They imply the fucker part themselves, it's part of their troll
  
  They are a troll and you are enabling them to harrass your community.
  
  They were already banned for other trolling behavior, just not because they used neopronouns. Please get an actual bearing on reality.
  
  Sorry I'm not allowed to use that space because I called a troll a troll before the Admins felt like doing their fucking jobs.
  I'm not going back now, blahaj is a cess pool controlled by trolls.
  
  “dragonfucker” and “attack helicopter”
  i mean, if they're doing it as a haha funny, i see no harm, but if they're also being assholes, i think that takes precedent. You aren't legally required to fill in your gender tagging appropriately so.
  
  They are an asshole though, a serial pot stirring drama seeking troll that gets people banned for reacting to their ragebait. Yeah I identify as a refurbished ebike and you must relearn English to refer to me, and you only rather not because you agree with literal genocide. Funny!
  
  lmao good meme, sounds like a mess ngl.
  
  I haven't seen the attack helicopter and the joke is pretty damn old tbh, but drag at least is/was kinda funny. Drag's profile specified that drag's pronoun is "drag" in not just third, but also first and second person, which is an interesting concept. Drag also stayed in character in drag's posts. Drag didn't ever really bother people with the whole thing IMO.
  
  yeah, it's a dead beat joke, it's come around to the point now where you can do it ironically and nobody cares. Though i guess you could still just be an asshole at that point lmao.
- also our wonderful admin kaity did what the lemmy devs couldn't and nuked the dm spam :)
  
  It really seems like instance admins tend to do a much better job with a lot of stuff on here than the core devs. Its a shame that forking would take as much work as it would.
  
  well some of the devs are too busy arguing over which authoritarian boot tastes the best, all under the guide of leftism, so yeah I imagine the bar isn't exactly high
- Pfft, I'd say overly aggressive to a fault. It's not a good thing when they're banning people for a passing comment where the worst offence is "gatekeeping" rather than something that matters.
- As much as I appreciate the community and users, there are (or at least were) serious moderation problems on Blahaj, I did not feel safe there when I tried it a year or two ago.
  
  I definitely cannot agree. I encourage anyone who has any issues with moderation to make a post in the Blahaj meta community. Ada and Kaity have been spectacular and have responded to every issue I have come across. There are limits, they can't preemptively prevent any kind of moderation issue but they respond quickly.
- Probably the ... fourth-worst well known instance. Idk if that's a good suggestion.

363 comments