In a just world, you’d have been bumped up a grade, moved into an advanced track, or given time in advanced sessions with other gifted students. That said, your teacher would have been responsible for making those recommendations.
Oh that did end up happening eventually. I did go down that track. Ended up taking calculus freshman year of high school.
Exactly. Intentionality matters. It's the difference between killing someone through accident and carelessness (like a distracted driver causing a car accident) and malice (arranging to deliberately run someone over with your car.) One is a crime like manslaughter, the other is first degree murder. Intention is everything in law and morality.
Google:
"No need to sue us. Mr Maclsaac was listed in Google search as a sex offender, but wasn't actually on the sex offender registry. But no worry, we've fixed the problem! We have several government records contracts. Our LLM simply corrected the record and added Ashley to the sex offender registry. The error has been resolved."
A fool and his money are soon parted.
Fine. That's it! We're calling the Ghost Busters! Time to bring out the proton packs!
It's not about significant progress. I'm talking about how long the process takes to actually get done. There's a lot of bad info out there about HRT only producing effects for the first two years or so. This comes from the fact that most studies on HRT effects simply don't last longer than two years.
But I've met many trans people who get distraught in the early part of HRT, concluding that "hormones do nothing" or that they're having no effect. Hell, I was one of them. And I am talking specifically about HRT here. Emotional resources and time don't really factor into what effects you get from HRT, unless you're so incredibly stressed that it's actually materially affecting your health.
This is Paul Harvey...Good Day!
When I was a child, I was told that Communism failed because it gave no incentive for people to work hard and better themselves and their society. After all, if everyone is paid the same and has a guaranteed job, why worker harder than than anyone else? As an adult, I learned the same thing applies to workers in capitalist societies. In most companies, there is little reason to do more than the bare minimum needed to keep from getting fired. Promotions never happen as companies prefer to hire externally. Real raises and bonuses don't happen; you have to move companies to get a real raise. And of course, workers don't get any direct reward for working more. The owners just pocket all the profits and tell you to work harder.
I turns out both American Capitalism and Soviet Communism wasted colossal amounts of human potential.
“How do bird’s fly?”
Mostly horizontally, a bit vertically. 😂
My worst version of this was in third grade where we learned our multiplication tables. Our teacher had us all make multiplication flashcards. 1x1 up through 12x12. She then assigned us to spend a certain amount of hours practicing the flashcards, including some log and parental sign-off IIRC. A card might have "3x8" written on one side, "24" on the other. Practice and drill until you memorize them all.
Well, the problem I had was that I memorized my times tables in a fraction of the time we were required to practice. I ended up getting in trouble for not having enough practice hours - even though I was acing the quizzes we were getting. This wasn't even about showing your work, as this was a rote exercise in memorization!
But the teacher thought that it took X number of hours of practice to learn your times tables. That's what she assigned, and nothing was going to change her mind. So I sat at home pointlessly practicing the times tables I had already memorized, instead of doing something fun or even moving ahead to more advanced math concepts.
The "bones" meme always just shows just how little imagination transphobes have. They have way less faith in archaeologists than I do. Archaeologists are bad asses. Don't sell them short!
You know what I think archaeologists would discover if they dug up my bones in a millennium? I think their write-up would look something like this:
"Subject approximately 165 cm in height. Buried with female-typical attire. Genetic tests reveal XY chromosomes. Detailed analysis of bones indicates the subtle effects of decades of testosterone suppression and estrogen use. Facial bone structure indicates evidence of surgical alteration. Gravestone marker indicates this person likely identified as binary female. This subject likely represents an example of a 21st century transgender person. In this era, trans people transitioned with exogenous hormones and surgeries before nanobot technology advanced to the point of allowing complete sex reassignment at the cellular, genetic, and organ level."
The standard "archaeology" meme suffers from two fatal assumptions:
I think both are false. Even without having undergone FFS, decades of HRT have likely left subtle impacts on my bones that could be read by a skilled practitioner. Subtle changes in shape, density, composition, etc. And most critically, trans people aren't going anywhere. We've been here for thousands of years. We're not a fad; we're a type of human being. You can genocide every trans person on the planet away tomorrow, and in a generation a whole new crop will have grown up, seeking the same treatments and transition process as those that came before. Archaeologists a thousand years from now will know what trans people are, because some of them will be trans themselves.
I think a future archaeologist would likely be thrilled to find my bones. "Holy hell, we actually found one of those rare trans skeletons! I can't wait to try to figure out what kind of medical treatments she underwent!" That sounds like the type of thing archaeology nerds dream about. And I think they would recognize me, and other trans people of today, as a kind of missing link, an example of early gender/sex transition. In a thousand years, transition might consist of a pill that just completely rebuilds your biology including reproductive organs. In that world, gender transition is common. Hell, most people do it just to see what it's like on the other side for awhile. Maybe everyone spends a year in college living as the opposite sex. IDK. The future is weird, weirder than we can imagine. And trans people will absolutely be part of that future. And they would recognize us as a step on the road that lead to their world.
What happens if I use a large fan and air pump to direct your mist form into a small propane cylinder and then seal it closed?
This is...umm..why my DM hates me. 😅
This just doesn't pass the smell test to me. Why would they need to go to the trouble? It's not like they can't figure out who is trans through name and gender change court records, health records, etc. Even if these aren't gathered in one list anywhere, it wouldn't be hard to have an AI run through name change records and flag anyone that changed their name from a typically masculine to a typically feminine name, and vice versa.
Sure, there are some very paranoid/privacy-minded trans folks that never put their transness in government or medical records. They never change their name legally, they DIY HRT, etc. And those folks would be difficult to find. However, I imagine most such folks would be far too cautious to join a trans-specific dating app.
past that, shave your body and paint your nails. learn makeup if you like and just be ready for a long journey. transition is a marathon, not a sprint!
I would second the marathon part. Often the most distressing part of transition is from years 1-3 or so. At year one, the initial euphoria from coming out has worn off. But you're only one year in to what is really an 8-10 year second puberty. One year in, you're no more "done" with transition than an 11 year old is with normal puberty.
The best option I use is 2 pairs of elastic cotton panties that are a size or two small, and practice with those until you feel you have it down.
That's what I did. I never even owned a gaff. I got by with just wearing two pairs of cotton panties a size or two too small. Did that right up until SRS eliminated the need to tuck forever. Seriously. Tucking SUCKS. Eliminating it was one of the best things about getting SRS.
Let's see, generic trans and trans fem advice. Stream of consciousness, no particular order. A lot of these are assuming you're a binary trans person aiming for a binary transition to female. If passing isn't something you care about, then a lot of this won't apply. A lot of this also discusses things that arise from medical transition such as HRT. If that's not something you want, then some of these won't apply.
If passing is your goal, start working on your voice today. Voice is one of the strongest tells there is. Medical transition is an agonizingly slow process, waiting for hormones to have their time to act, waiting for surgical wait times, etc. But voice is one of the few parts of transition that is effort-based and also costs nothing. Start working on it today; there's simply no substitute for putting in the work.
EYEBROWS!!!
When picking out a wardrobe, be sure to dress your age. If you just want to say, "fuck the world, I don't care what you think!", fair enough. If you want to transition and assimilate into the world as a functioning adult woman, then you need to dress your age. Wearing skirts that are more appropriate on a 14 year old can be a fun exercise in wish fulfillment and making up for lost time, but dressing your age is essential if you actually want to assimilate in to the social role of a late 20s woman.
START PEOPLE WATCHING. Seriously. Go to a mall, a farmer's market, or some other location large groups congregate. Look at people. Actually look at them. Observe the subtle differences in behavior between men and women. Body language. Posture. Speech patterns. This is also how you figure out how to dress your age. Don't creep on people. But just subtly observe. Yes, some gender rebels will lament that you shouldn't have to appeal to feminine standards of behavior, and that gender is a social construct. But "construct" does not mean "meaningless." If your goal is to actually transition and live as a woman in this society, you'll need to adopt most of the social norms of the female gender. This doesn't mean that you need to appeal to every stereotype; you can be a tomboy. But if your behaviors fall entirely within society's social construct of the male gender, you will be gendered male. Once you observe these behaviors, start practicing them and changing yours to match.
If you are seeking medical transition, you are responsible for your own transition. Not your doctor. You. Really internalize this. Trust but verify everything your doctor tells you. Good trans medicine is the exception, not the rule. If you transition and live for years as trans, you will experience mistreatment in healthcare. You will likely be underdosed. There's a good chance your doctor will tell you your E levels are fine when you're sitting there with levels of a post-menopausal woman. Trust but verify everything your doctor says. After bloodwork, NEVER simply listen to your doctor when they just say, "your levels are fine." Insist on seeing the actual numbers yourself, and know what range you should be aiming for. People routinely lose years of progress because of doctors humoring trans people with criminal underdosing rather than actually prescribing effective doses. If you need to, DIY. It's not as scary as you think it is, trans people DIYing is the rule, not the exception. Learn what trans broken arm syndrome is and be on the lookout for it.
If you're looking for name ideas, again, it's a personal approach thing. If you're looking for ideas and just want something that won't stand out, consult the census. At least in the US, the Census publishes a list of the most popular baby names by year, sorted by sex. Go and look up the most popular baby names FOR THE YEAR YOU WERE BORN. Often times trans people will chose a name that is popular today, as in a popular name for babies being born today. This is how you end up with someone in their twenties having a name that seems more appropriate for someone in kindergarten. Names vary in popularity with time. If you choose a name that doesn't match you age, it will stick out. Same thing if you pick a name from anime or from a culture you're not a member of. Again, if you don't care about sticking out, fair enough. But imagine yourself at 60 with your name. That's the kind of timeframe you need to be thinking about.
If doing medical transition and HRT, stockpile stockpile stockpile. Supply disruptions are common, and restarting care can be difficult each time you move.
Be prepared for your position in the world to change. Say goodbye to male privilege. (Though trans people rarely get the full privilege level of their birth sex.) Be prepared to change how you physically navigate the world. People will treat you differently. It will become much less safe to walk out alone at night. You may get catcalled. People will expect you to act in a feminine social role. And if you don't, you will be judged for it. You will get talked over. Your ideas will go unheard. Sticking up for yourself will get you labeled as "difficult" or "aggressive." Basically you get all the crap that gets piled on cis women, plus the crap that gets piled on trans people.
Really talk with your partner. Are they really up for this? Most cis people really don't understand just how much transition can change. Cis people tend to think of transition as a very cosmetic thing; most don't even know what hormones do. They think breast implants and genital surgery. That is what transition means to them. They really fail to understand that if you go on HRT, you are very literally altering your sex at a fundamental level. They're not anticipating the entire smell and pheromone profile of their partner changing. They're not anticipating the changes in body hair, muscle and fat distribution, genital changes, etc that come with hormones, or even just the change in behavior that often comes with transition. And it's very common for partners to want to make the relationship work. They'll say, "I'll love you no matter what," and they will actually mean it. But you can't control what you're attracted to. If someone is attracted to masculine bodies, they're attracted to male secondary sex characteristics. They can't help it. They can't change it any more than a gay person can choose to be straight. But because cis people think transition is cosmetic, they often feel that as long as they're not bigoted, they can still love their partner and be with them. Then their partner's secondary sex characteristics completely flip, and they lose all sexual attraction to them. Personally, if I was in this situation, unless my partner had a clear history of bisexuality - having actually slept with both men and women prior to me transitioning - I would assume the relationship to be doomed. Sometimes people can make it work. But transition in many ways fundamentally changes your sex. You are becoming a woman. If your partner isn't attracted to cis women, they probably won't remain attracted to you. You can still remain close lifelong friends, but realistically, the vast majority of relationships that are "straight" at the time one partner comes out end up not working out long term.
Learn to dress to your strengths. If you're like most trans women, you probably have wider shoulders than you would prefer. Certain clothes look good on different body types. Learn how to dress yours.
Sorry for the info dump. This wasn't meant to be a coherent thing, just a collection of tips and things to think about. I may add others later as well. For background, I'm a trans gal myself. 15 years HRT and living out, 13 post FFS and SRS. I have extensive experience both with the transition process and navigating the world as a newly transitioned woman. Feel free to ask any questions you might have.
Congrats! And really, the freedom to just where whatever you want really is understated. Plus, just never having to tuck again is such a relief.
Ok. Next time you meet a genie wish for "immunity to all electric shocks."
Defibrillators probably wouldn't work on you. But in turn you can pull off an instant nudity button!
Your point three really hits hard. It's amazing how often respect, even among allies, can be contingent. Among some folks, do something they don't like? They'll weaponize your birth sex against you. You can see this tendency in response to news stories. Trans people are just like any other group - there's saints and sinners among us. Some of any group end up being sociopaths who do terrible things. When a trans woman does something legitimately horrible, you'll see even allies aggressively misgendering them. When I see that, it's a clear reminder that they don't truly view trans identities as legitimate. They respect or humor your identity based on politeness, but they truly don't view it as real. No one starts calling a cis woman a man when they commit some horrible crime. A cis woman could literally rape and murder children - she still wouldn't be called a man. She would be called a monster, but her gender would not be stripped from her. The same is not true for trans women.
But yeah, in normal social interactions, I absolutely get the lack of aggression. I consistently feel the need to be less assertive and aggressive than cis women.