Skip Navigation

InitialsDiceBearhttps://github.com/dicebear/dicebearhttps://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/„Initials” (https://github.com/dicebear/dicebear) by „DiceBear”, licensed under „CC0 1.0” (https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/)U
Posts
7
Comments
147
Joined
3 wk. ago

  • Wow this is an interesting take and I have to say I agree.

  • well you could be right but I feel like my outlook on adulthood cant really be compared to any others right now since I dont have a ton of experience on what a healthy adulthood oughta look like. Im only 30. When Im 55 or 75 I think Il bee far more qualified to speak on what a healthy adulthood looks like.

    Im not putting you on the spot of anything but do you have anythings to recommend that I can compare my outlook on adulthood to to others' to demonstrate the flaws I have on my outlook please? Its ok of you cant recommend anything other than me just talking to more adults. I know that I am heavily inexperienced because ya Im only 30 year olds and 30 year olds tend to not be the most experienced or have very good complex analysis of how a healthhy adulthood oughta look like.

    Also yoyusaid that there is no standard. And yes I agree, I dont think there is a formal standard. BUT Personally I feel that there should be some sort of 'social-contract-based' or 'informal' standard as to whst a healthy adulthood oughta look like or look similar to. Like being a diehard nazi in your 60s or even your 40s or 20s is supposedly a good standard for adulthood for some....why? 🤨 I think most would disagree with that. The way I see it is that there are many things that the law allows an adult to do and get away with HOWEVER I do think that there should be certain things that are 'informally-enforced' by the social contract mosts adults have agreed on. Like being a fully grown adult who was caught in the Epstein Files or being an unafraid die hard nazi who has committed many hatr crimes should, in my opinion , cause an adult to be treated in 'certain ways ' by the followers of the social contract , until they begin the process to pay reparations to affected groups of their barbarism. Am I wrong?

    I read that casey anthony gets bullied occasionally because of her crimes that we ALL know she actually committed(pfft girl stop lying . We have you !) and....I have no problem with I read about there and I dont see it as a problem until she confesses completely and takes full accountability for all she has done. Am I wrong about this? I would highly doubt that Im wrong about this.

  • Thank you for saying this.

    I think that theres another aspect to this flawed outlook on life that I want to point out . Like if someone feels cheated by others who got something they didnt get and they feel bitter about this and then they make efforts to harm and exclude those who got that thing, doesnt that make them get trapped in sort of a cycle where they continually isolate others who got that thing , even the people of that group who could genuinely help them?

    Like if you get bullied by a bunch of White people simply cause youre not White and you decide to just completely ostracise all White people? THAT is a bad plan. Youre ostracizing an entire group of people , there are many different types of people in each groups of peoples. There are clearly many White people who knows that all non-White people are their equals and treat them as such. If you feel bitter towards all White people you will miss out on important life lessoms that some of them can teach you and even some important life lessons you can teach them. If you feel saddened cause your mom or dad or both said that they will never raise you or see you again when you were younger , being bitter towards people who had been raised by both parents is bad cause some of them have important life lessons about being raised by both parents that you may never have had heard otherwise.

    You can even apply this lesson in other ways. Like all because some Muslims are hardcore Saudi-prince-loving wahhabists that doesnt mean you should ostracize them all. All because some French people support the current colonization of Kanaky that doesnt mean all French people do so ostracizjng all french people is nonsensical. You could apply this to any group. A few bad apples doesnt ruin the fresh bunch.

    I used to have A LOOOT of internalized racism. I saw Black people as not worthy of listening to even though I myself am Black. I basically saw only White people as worthy of listening to about ANY topic. You should have seen my jaw hit the floor when I realized that there were Black people out there with doctorates who were equally as qualified and knowledgable of certain subjects as any equally qualified White person. I was even more shocked when I started watching videos of Nlack people who went through similar experiences as me and were talking in depth about it!

  • not hating on anything you wrote I think its mostly correct.

    But I thought the DSM classified sociopaths and psychoapths as the same thing no? They said that theure just gonna generalize the two terms as both meaning Antisocial Personality Disorder if mymemory is correct

  • forget only the bodycams have you seen the true crime stories that come out on some of these old idiots after they get arrested and charged?

    Theres that one guy who drove his car through all those people during that parade before he got arrested . Apparently he had impregnated a 12 year old before that... Ah! darrell brooks was his name. He really thinks that his scizophrenia diagnosis will allow him to act like an incorrectly raised 12 year old forever and be forgiven EVERY time.... 😐

    I remember seeing another bodycam of a man who was in his 40s who when he was getting arrested for taking inappropriate pictures of young girls at a Krampus event he said 'My mom's a lawyer! Im calling my mom' to the officers... 😐

    ....Like....dude....hello?! GROW UP!

  • EXACTLY!

    Fuck capitalism and crapitalists!

  • but you dont know what a senior has been through in their life. Alsoo old age makes it more likely that somekne has a neurological disorder like Alzheimer's or schizophrnia and such illnesses practically guarantee that someone will act in unusual ways and say unusual things. Sometimes hurtful things.

    The least you can do is give leeway to seniors who have become older and wiser with age and have learned the Golden Lesson of 'Always treat others as they or you want to be treated'

  • Ah I see. And sadly yes youre right. Its like the people who need it the most have a tendency to Dunning-Krueger themselves into believing they dont need it at all, while those who are more open to the idea and need it less so are the most likely to seek a psychologust to speak with.

  • Thank you for this.

    And this further proves to me how we should create a world where struggling to survive is practically impossible for all people of peaceful will. The less tha tpeople are stuck worrying about just survival the more we can worry about things that actually will improve our collective mental healths like self-actualization and climate change, and the end to all these needless wars and genocides.

  • Im not even joking I simply said to my doctor that Im feeling 'self deletable' and I was given an appointment with a osychologist within the same week. Completely free. I was shocked at the expediency. I still talk to that psychologist about once a few months, not because she has a full schedule but because Im busy doing things. I could make numerous appointments with her per a month, like once a week, I have just chosen not to.

    Im speaking from a point of privelege once again cause ease of acfess to mental health care clearly isnt available for everyone.

    But this was about 7 or so years ago so I dont think much has changed.

    But you said that these people dont need mental health care and now Im curous as to why you think that? I was stuck ina cycle of thinking when I was at had my most 'self-deleting' desires but the words of my psychologist broke the cycle to make me think in different ways about my self-deleting thoughts . I realised that my self-deletiony was a strange defense mechanism I created for myself and I was just relying on it cyclically to accept that Ill never have to do anything and if Im ever asked to do something that I must? Ill just delete myself.. (yes , it was a very strange defence mechanism . But it was what it was)

    I feel that a lot of these people I speak of , older , biased to the point of self-destruction, selfish , and even generally sef-destructive, need that one or two intervention that breaks this cycle that theure stuck in. And in my opinion that people created this psychological cycle as a reaction to the cruel capitalistic world and people who have harmed them. basically I now see their cruelty was simply a DEFENSE MECHANISM they created as a reaction to the cruelty theyve experienced and now theyre stuck on this cycle of a defense mechanism cause they dont see any other method to use. I canexucse a younger person who thinks like this since most young people are impressionable and inexperienced. But for an older person? ...No.... You dont think the same of them?

  • ya youre right I should probably remove that.

    I only used negative IQ because I remember seeing it from a meme and it stuck with me cause it was kind of funny lol

    I do think the number is almost meaningless cause it only measures your comprehension of what the IQ test asks of you and not your comprehension of more complex things like different human connections and different things the human body can do when it comes to things like dancing , or reaction time or calisthenics for examples.

  • I remmember I used to have a racist coworker and I tried to be kind to him and help him understand that he cant keep saying and doing such things to his fellow coworkers cause they werent 'White Enough©®™' for his liking. ...Was it worth it?....No....Cause he got worse... Somehow

    I got fired anyways so I have no idea how he is nowadays. Maybe he's turned around....hopefully...

  • Something that sticks with me are those people who reach middle age, like deep into their 40s or or even into their senior years, and theyre still cluelessly lost as to how to just be empathetic or to not call me or others racial or derogatory slurs. Ive been called slurs by far more people who Ive observed were probably older than 40 than I have been by people who were in their 20s or even their teens.

    I can excuse a youngin who behaves in almost any way because we were all young and easily impressionable, right? Even I was once a young knucklehead .

    But I feel that there is a certain age where your own tenacity should take over and you should be the one who makes the call on how you will behave and will react to different situatiins - and it should always be the more empathetic call . If youre past like 40 amd youre still out here calling people slurs or ghosting people when you have accepted to be their friend or ghosting people who you have agreed to date? then I dont know what to say to ' you other than I think you need a psychologist. Not nly for your safety but for also the rest of mankind's safety' . I feel there's a lot of people who need mental health assistance so they can break that cycle of conditioning themselves to be so cold and to break the cycle of trauma theyve experienced and not dole out their pain to others is all Im saying.

  • Well, rather than wondering about how they have lived this long and still haven’t learned, that can be flipped the other way around too: they’ve acted this way for 60 years already. The patterns of that behaviour are quite deeply engraved at that point and even more difficult to get rid of. Older people are called stubborn for a reason and there are sayings about that too such as “an old dog doesn’t learn new tricks.” However, as I said, it’s not to excuse that behaviour but rather just approach it from a different angle. When a person behaves that way asserting blame as if they could have acted otherwise is unproductive. The focus should in my opinion be in understanding that this behaviour is usually a symptom of some deeper issues. These people are in pain whether they know it or not.

    Ah yes! Good ooint. It could just be that theyre conditioned to act or react in those ways to certain , or sometimes even all, stressors in their life . Like their oast trauma has been so thorough and long that theyve become conditioned in this way usually through no fault of their own. I dont think we should excuse toxic behaviours though I was watching this one Dave's Lemonade episode about a man who did something absoutely heinous but after hewas caught and convicted there was a 'secondary trial' for him that assessed whst in his life led to him becoming the type of man that he was....and....yup! His childhood and even his adulthood too surprisingly clearly explained how he became the way he became. Ill try to find thr video... Edit : Here it is: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Otz6Ydf9Avk

    But again: stressed out, underslept, overworked and then tipped over by a minor inconvenience. The reasons behind this kind of behaviour are usually rather mundane

    Good point. Well I guess I am speaking from a point of privelege here again cause usually when I feel this way I can take a moment , or even many moments, to just cool off , understand what is making me mad, understand ehat happened to me, and try to find ways to overcome it. Others may not have this luxury...

  • Now THIS is something I can agree with.

    This centering we have done of capital and its accumulation and those who have taken a large amount of resources or political connection can defintely lead to humanity and humanism becoming a less important priority in the eyes of people.

    Why cant we build societies where humanity , humanity's needs , our needs for social connections and our connection to our envirinments and the planet is at the centre of everything we plan and do?

  • well youre not wrong . I am DEFINITELY not a paragon of empathy . And yes I do have my biases, but almost all humans have some biases right?

    But as for my 'abuse of others' ?... Wot? I swear Id never. I never want to hurt innocent people and further 'enshittify' the world that is already shitty.

  • I will admit thst the lack of mental health care provided by those in power most places makes me start to understand why this is such a recurring phenomena in many places .

    Though I live i canada which pretty much has free mental health care and ONCE AGAIN most of the people Ive talked to here have either ghosted me for no reason which theyve stated, ignored me , or said mean words or done mean actions to me. This is the same regardless of the age of the person Ive talked to . I would assume that a person who was 40+ would have wised up as to how this is not a way to behave to other people who you have been talking to fr the last couple of weeks , months ...and yet...

  • I did and I have the 'blur nsfw' instructiom unchecked and the 'show nsfw' instruction checked. So 🤷🏿‍♂️