1y ago

What programming languages exist in the Star Trek Universe?

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Lisp. All is Lisp.
Data's entire consciousness was written as an Emacs package.
Klingons program in Brainfuck. A Warrior's Language!
Vulcans exclusively use APL.
The F in Ferengi stands for Fortran.
Python is banned across the known galaxy. If your race is discovered using it, your planet is immediately bombarded until the entire crust is molten.
Cardassians use Haskell because they're evil.
- You missed out Q Basic.
  
  Holy shit you win, lol
  
  That's what the Pakled use. The best of them actually use QuickBasic to "make it go faster".
- The F in Ferengi stands for Fortran.
  If Ferengi were to use a language that old, you'd think it would be the COmmon Business-Oriented Language.
- Just to add - obviously all Ferengi programs run on a Blockchain, and are riddled with microtransactions.
- I'll just add that Data was previously built as a Vi plugin, but it was evil, so Doctor Soong disassembled it and shut it down. A lot of trouble could have been saved it Dr Soong had learned how to actually exit Vi.
  
  Evil as in emacs evil-mode?
- Pakleds use scratch
  
  Are you sure? They might have learned something then. Or did they get stuck with a turtle-logic compiler instead?
  
  PHP was invented by a Pakled
- The Q continum uses forth.
- Hahaha, why no python?
  
  The reason has been purged, intentionally forgotten. Vulcans train their entire lives to take on a dangerous task: once every 66 years, the very best of the best view the reason why Python is banned. Once viewed, the Vulcan confirms that it is indeed a just and necessary action to ban the ancient language.
  After the task is complete, the Vulcan goes utterly, irretrievably insane and dies mere hours later.
- @bloopernova Wouldn't the Vulcans prefer Prolog?
- No malbolge? https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malbolge
- What about php

62 comments