Foolproof advice
Foolproof advice
Comments
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In the unlikely event that she reacts poorly she might be on her period. You should ask her to make sure though.
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Yeah i always take stock and usually calm down when a guy im arguing with points that out.
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- Top 10: Ways to flirt with a woman sexually
- Top 10: Ways to flirt with a woman financially
- Top 10: Ways to flirt with a woman bureaucratically
- Top 10: Ways to flirt with a woman maliciously
- Top 10: Ways to flirt with a woman abstractly
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That doesn't sound right but I don't know anything about women to dispute it.
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This has to be satire.
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There's no way that last sentence especially isn't satire
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I thought so too until I went to the website and I still couldn't tell :/
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There’s lots of really fucking stupid people out there so who knows.
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It’s not. It’s from 2008 and the site is still posting weird shit now.
Here’s an archive of this particular tip, the others are cringe too. So are the comments
Edit: there was a dating tips newsletter too
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It's not. This has worked on me four times.
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I am once again asking lemmy users to check what community they're in before commenting
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It's typo progressive for him. He's the "your wife shouldn't get wet" type.
Edit: autocorrect fail in the worst/best way there
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Dont get her wet, don't feed her after midnight. Hes very strict about rules for his wife.
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Sounds condescending. Why not just compliment her ovipositor?
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Madam, my compliments to your ovaries 🎩💪🏼🥚🙇
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My dear, your claoca looks especially receptive this fine evening.
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Why, thank you, I've just been to the remora. And might I say what a stable dorsal fin you have.
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Pretty sure that's my first gag-upvote. Thanks, I guess.
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Community Note: This is actually bad advice that will get you stabbed
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You're right, and I find it hilarious that this needs to be noted.
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Can confirm, was stabbed.
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Oh yeah. Zero chance of back fire. Zero. Had sex all my life - once with a women. Trust me.
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once with a women. Trust me.
Stop bragging
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This is like when you teach someone that a swear is a greeting in a foreign language
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🖕 peace among worlds!
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Yes, please do that. So we are immediately aware that we should get away as fast as possible.
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Rings true to me. My wife never vacuums and is past menopause.
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Not sure if AI or just incredibly stupid.
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Pretty sure it's a joke.
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We live in a post irony world and I literally can't tell the difference without knowing the source.
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Why not both?
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Of course, I forgot answer C. All of the above.
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We all love some good ol' mansplainimg.
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I have a sudden urge to vacuum, and without ovaries! 😍
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Vacuuming? Are you ovulating or something?
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So you just like to suck then? ;)
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I feel sorry for any guy dumb enough to try this. Also my friends mom when i was 13 vacuumed every day and rearranged all furniture and vacuumed behind everything once a week.
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Wow what a cycle that must have sucked
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This is for betas. It says so in the upper right corner.
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Damn I guess I’ve never ovulated in my life
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"No, stop, where are you going? I have it on very good authority that you enjoy this!"
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This must be why the site is still in Beta
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I'm surprised they fought the urge to stay alpha forever
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Poe's law
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I do all the vacuuming here.
Considering neither me nor the wifey are fertile, I think this is easily debunked and closed, then label as "incel drivel" and thrown into the fire.
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Username is definitely relevant. :)
I would consider your comment to be far more truthful and accurate than what is pictured in the OP.
Have a good day.
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My wife always, always wanted pasta right before her period. It was always a good warning flag for her/us. So, this thread is a bit believable, …for me.
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I pretty much always want pasta... Maybe I'm always experiencing menses.
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yeah it seems like one of those things where you'll probably almost definitely see some kind of behavioral change, but what specifically is basically completely up in the air. My chronic suicidal ideation will flare up really bad right before I begin menstruating. Having an IUD means menstruating a lot less but it also makes it less predictable. So I'll be in this deep dark hole for a few days that I would swear up and down is the worst I've ever felt and it's never gonna get any better then one morning I'm taking a piss and my boxers have blood on them and I'm just like "...ooooooh."
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hang on, I feel there could be false positives there. Did she ever want pasta when she wasn't on her period?
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Suckers gonna suck
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Feels like an example of crabs in a bucket
We all know that won't work. Try this instead.
"Are you ovulating? I have cheese if you are."
To be fair, cheese works on most people, whether or not they're ovulating.
The cheese is under my foreskin
That's kind of an insane gift for a first date given how expensive cheese is.
Would marry that farmer. No questions asked, no long engagement. Straight to the court house, we're getting hitched.
True love right there
Bro, plastic cheese…
Fun fact, the digestion of milk/cheese creates casomorphins from caesin, one of the most prominent peptides in milk. Casomorphins can activate opioid receptors. Giving a woman a slice of cheese might work in your benefit if she eats the cheese.
I read that as "a slice of milk" and like. Technically yeah it's not wrong
Wait, all opiods? If so does that man that heroin addicts could have a few slices of cheese and use less smack? Gotta have the healthier option, ya know
Yeah but this one unironically works for a lot of women.
Works for a lot of men too. I mean not me. I prefer mozzarella.
Idk, this piece of advice legitimately works on my wife.
That shoe one just reminded me that when we bought our house and had to start renovations on it, the attic had lots of women's shoes. Just one shoe from a pair and all different shoes. I have so many questions for the previous owner, but unfortunately they are no longer with us.
If they were all the same size, perhaps amputee?
Or maybe a really specific fetish.
Maybe both.
Quite possibly a question best left unanswered, at least until you no longer live there
Maybe they robbed a shoe store. On displays they frequently leave one shoe from a pair so that stealing them just nets you a pile of left shoes lol
My ex gf and i used to steal each other fancy cheeses. It was the most intense love i have ever felt.
My mom and I used to steal fancy cheese for each other. God I miss that woman like you can't believe. 10/10 mom and person.
How do you steal each other fancy cheeses? Or steal fancy cheese from each other?
I like the idea that these are all steps to one process. Like, you gotta steal her shoe and some hair and pins, and the best distraction is with cheese.
Fascinating
🖖
also: username checks out
I keep stealing shoes, and filling it with rue, but all it's given me are shouting matches
I tried this with my fiance with a dairy allergy and now I'm single again.
removed love cheddar
The stinkier the cheese, the more the fascination!