10h ago

In the Future All Food Will Be Cooked in a Microwave, and if You Can’t Deal With That Then You Need to Get Out of the Kitchen

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9h ago

In the Future All Food Will Be Cooked in a Microwave, and if You Can’t Deal With That Then You Need to Get Out of the Kitchen

www.colincornaby.me /2025/08/in-the-future-all-food-will-be-cooked-in-a-microwave-and-if-you-cant-deal-with-that-then-you-need-to-get-out-of-the-kitchen/

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13h ago

In the Future All Food Will Be Cooked in a Microwave, and if You Can’t Deal With That Then You Need to Get Out of the Kitchen

www.colincornaby.me /2025/08/in-the-future-all-food-will-be-cooked-in-a-microwave-and-if-you-cant-deal-with-that-then-you-need-to-get-out-of-the-kitchen/

13 comments

This is great satire, but unfortunately you can replace microwave with AI and CEO's are actually saying this shit fr.
One of my chefs mentioned that if they could cook the steak on the grill they could get it right the first time. This is not an acceptable attitude in the microwave era. Chefs have fragile egos and they all seem to enjoy cooking (???) so it’s obvious they’re just too attached to the food. Also they’re worried I’m planning on firing all of them. That’s true but not relevant here.
Second – you need to realize I’m an idea person. Ok? Who else would have thought about putting pepperoni on a pizza? And if I didn’t have a microwave no one may have delivered that idea at all. With a microwave I was able to deliver that idea much faster. The new economy will be purely idea based. Is the quality of a microwaved pizza worse? Sure. But by 1960 cooking pizzas in ovens will be a thing of the past. I don’t have any evidence to back that up. But any rational person can see in a few short years ovens will be gone.
- That's frequently the best satire though where you can do exactly that.
  
  That's... what satire is.
I think we should all burn an effigy in commitment to safe microwaves ovens.
https://www.amazon.com/Microwave-Cooking-One-Marie-Smith/dp/1565546660
- Usually its just soup for one, salad for one, wine for three.
Ingl, a microwave oven with air circulation is pretty neat. That last part is important tho
- Like, just a fan, or like a combo microwave and convection oven? Because the latter is something I sometimes wonder if would be a good idea.
  
  They've been around for a while, at least in commercial kitchens. It's what subway uses to toast sandwiches.
  
  Oh, sorry, yes I mean a microwave + convection oven combo. Didn't know how to translate that properly. My mom got one and it's basically an air frier, a microwave and a mini-oven in one. Pretty cool stuff

13 comments