Amusement

A nice glass of wine to go with the coffee

Sweet Red Espresso Martini

1 oz vodka 1 oz Oliver Sweet Red wine 1.5 oz chilled espresso or cold brew coffee 1 oz simple syrup 1 egg white
Pour all ingredients into cocktail shaker. Add ice. Shake vigorously until rich foam forms. Pour into coupe or martini glass. Garnish with espresso beans.
https://www.oliverwinery.com/blog/sweet-red-espresso-martini
- That sounds dreadful
- Thought for sure this was straight out of an episode of Venture Brothers till I saw your link.
  Rusty Venture's cocktail recipes were an ongoing gag.

I feel personally attacked!

Those seem like some specifically designed compartments. What are all of the groves and notches for?
- Draining the blood away from the meat.
- Rolling blunts. You just have to keep your hands dry
- Soap dish (removable), wine glass slot, cell phone stand, drinking glass section. The large part standing up can be used to lean a tablet against.
- Orgasm tokens and body paint markers for drawing faces.
That's a beauty!
I would love one of these with a dish drying rack. I like to kill two birds with one stone and save water.
- ...remind me not to eat off any of your dishes
- Saving water is why I do all my meal prep while in the shower, but don't forget to install a garbage disposal in the drain, or you'll risk frequent clogs.
Unless that is teak wood would not be my first material choice.
- They make boats out of the stuff, I'm sure it will be fine.
Same model! Good for keeping the wine glass dry on the outside and popping up the kindle

NGL I never understand why people do things in the bath

as a gay male I can at least partially help break the illusion:
it's warm
gravity isn't being as much of a removed on your joints as it usually is (if you're over 30 OR breasting so boobily that you have back pain)
thanks i'm here all week
- As a straight male I can confirm these benefits.
  Unfortunately I don't have a bathtub that works with a tray- the wall side is too close with the wall :/
- breasting so boobily
  I’ve learned a new description for big ‘ol boobies and it’s fantastic.
- Why is being a gay male relevant?
It's relaxing, but I wouldn't spend hours reading or something, it's just uncomfortable and you look like a raisin afterwards.
- I think if you tried to spend hours in there the water would go cold, but it's comfortable for, say, 20, 30, maybe 40 minutes, which is enough to read for a bit or watch an episode of a series. It's indulgent, but it feels relaxing to shut yourself in the bathroom, go into a tub of hot water and relax isolated from the world outside.
It's the only warm place in the house.
It's a lovely way to unwind after a long day. Soaking in water takes weight off your joints and bones, the heat feels nice, and I'll usually put a show on my phone to unwind with an episode before I wash up.
My partner likes to spend a half hour or so reading or watching a show. She uses these trays to hold her book, some bath soap, and some cola light.
- Reading actual books (on paper!) in the bathtub is what I'll never get: How do you flip pages? Do you dry your hands for each page or do you just live with soggy pages? Also the humidity in general is bad for your books... That's why e-readers are so awesome.
I used to take a 30 min bath to ease my dermatitis.
Why even bathing instead of showering? It feels like swimming in your own dirt, while it's so hot you sweat, but can't really sweat, because it's wet too and because it's wet you can't really read a book or do something else.
- I don't usually take a bath to feel clean, I take one to relax
- If you're so incredibly filthy that a bath feels like soaking in your own dirt (no judgement, that's valid), you could shower first. A bath for me at least isn't about cleaning yourself, it's a relaxation thing.
- You can absolutely read a book.
  My books live by my bath while I am reading them.
  Reading a book is one of the great reasons to bath instead of shower.
It's because the water is hot and comfortable and helps with pain, but it's boring as heck to sit there long enough to enjoy the pain relief. So you bring a book or a tablet and a snack. Or if you're extra bad at relaxing, a tablet for show, a phone for game, a sweet treat, a salty treat and a nice cool water to help with the heat

What is that he's dropping? Looks like a slimjim, but the packaging is wrong and it wouldn't make sense with spaghetti.
And why is the water brown?
- It was a chocolate bar. What else do you eat with spaghetti in the bathtub?
- I have the same question as your first, but as for the second: probably whatever he's dropping isn't the first thing he dropped and other foodstuff has combined to dye the water.
- If I remember correctly it's a chocolate bar
Now this is what I can get behind on

ADHD brain can't handle a bath. It's too much relaxing and not enough doing.

Hence the tray, you do both and it's better than either. Wish I had one
- I guess I could code in the bath. But that might be dangerous.
Even showers are 10 minutes of staring at a fkn wall
- Get a shower speaker, actually wash yourself in the shower. Wow, a song and a half, guess I'm done.
- Not for Cosmo Kramer.
You gotta try farting bubbles

Ah yes, salt, pepper, wine, coffee and a traditional photo stand to look at an actual photograph.

Mmm yes

There's even some space left for a little jar of marmite!
That's salt and pepper? I assumed it was like face creams or something
- Face cream? In the bath? Get out of here!
I suppose they're trying to show all the things the tray can do, not an accurate representation of a person relaxing in the tub.

If I drink that much coffe I'll poop in the bathtub

Easy clean up.
- And the opportunity to waffle stomp.
Not sure if good or bad thing

Where's the hair wall?

Alright fellas, let's brainstorm this out. What do the ladies do in the bath?

I wish women were real. They're so pretty.
- From what I've read about them in books they seem really great
- just become one.
IDEA: Sir, is it possible we have things completely backwards? Perhaps it is the candles that go in the bath and the woman who goes on the tray.
- By god that might just be it!
- Give this man a raise for single handedly inventing the candle watching bridge!
IDEA: Demographic analysis suggests that women are invigorated by the presence of many thousands of stuffed animals while sleeping. Perhaps the tray is for holding her Squishmallows while she luxuriates in the lavendar-scented bathwater.
My wife has one, there's a couple of unburned candles on it, a battery powered lighter, some potpourri and a tablet stand.
I knew she uses the tablet stand, I think everything else is just because she likes the way it looks in these advertisements.
I’m one of them and I have no idea… why would you want to sit in your own filth? I’m also not a fan of swimming pools or jacuzzis.
- Ok l, no one tell her that air is technically a fluid, so she is already swimming in filth.
- So communal baths are right out?
- you shower before the bath

I mean... It's got a prop for your porn tablet and lots of room for magic wands, dildos and vibrators.

That tray looks perfect for masturbating in the tub.

wh–do other people with vaginas jerk off in the tub!? I specifically stopped taking baths because my snatch kept slurping water then ejecting it into my underwear later. Yick.
- I use the tub to see if a giant shit increases or decreases my volume
- I did not know that about cunt physics
- Maybe it wouldn't have been so rude if you gave it a straw to drink like a civilised people.
- Now there's a mental image.
- would it be more or less embarrassing to tell people the truth or that you just peed yourself?
- Just remember to do Kegels until the bathwater is out before you leave the tub.
You’d have to get a magic wand that doesn’t plug into the wall though, so you’re giving up on a bit of power.

It’s also weird how every prop on the tray is photoshopped in. Did the person making this image not even have physical access to the tray?

I can only assume that photography is illegal in China
If you don’t care about making it look right it’s way cheaper to buy the component images and piece them together than it is to coordinate a photo shoot with a model who is willing to get in a bath and the crew who would be needed (not a lot, but probably a lighting tech and a makeup person at least, if one of them was also willing and able to do things like keep the bubbles looking right.)
- But each of the props is individually photoshopped.
  Wouldn't you pick your stock photo of the woman in the bath, then create your green screen shot of the product with all the props actually on it with consistent lighting, and then Photoshop the whole then in as a single element? Why would they get stock assets for every single prop rather than use real props when photographing the product?

More like, "The AI program we used to generate this slop has no idea what a women do in the bathtub, or that humans don't drink wine and lattes simultaneously, and it can't even maintain a consistent perspective around the edge of the tub."

Don't be so quick to blame AI. this is horrible photo shopping at its prime. The glass of wine may as well be cut from a magazine and glued on. The tray is skewed incorrectly
- Yeah, it definitely looks like the tray was hastily slapped together in photoshop, but I think the tub and woman are AI. I could be wrong, but the perspective on the tub doesn't seem right, and she looks uncanny.
This ain't AI... This is the haphazardly thrown together product photos you see on amazon, which just plasters a few stock photos together with the product.
- Yeah its not ai just bad photoshop that never gets even the perspective right.
- Love the tiny wine glass with a weird perspective and lighting that has its foot cut in half.

Don't know about others, but I'll spin around dolphin-style and/or try and float.

I wish I could float. I can swim but floating ain't an option no more because of my bone density.

No tampoon dispencer?

they replaced that with a harpoon dispenser
- What could a shower be without a tampoon to the moon?

I mean, I sprung for a jacuzzi tub for a reason.

remember to clean your jets regularly i saw a video of someone cleaning the jets for someone who didn't know you had to clean them and i will never enter a mystery jacuzzi again oh god 🫠
- Yeah it can get really disgusting if you don't maintain it.

I know they don't look at me like that when I barge in.

Just get yourself a 2.5’x3.5’x5/16” steel plate, accomplishing the same thing.

That has another 2 degrees of freedom and could slide around a lot.

I mostly stare into the abyss.

One day the abyss will stare back.

These things are great for charcuterie boards

I have that exact tray!

“And up here is the squirt catcher”.

I am extremely gay and also don’t know how women use the bathtub but that is how I would design it for men.

How do people use bathtubs in general? Genuine question, these things just aren't common here at where I live at, there is only showers here

I've seen what happens, and I don't think you're allowed to show uncontrollable diarrhea in marketing material

Prop head on one of the corners, close eyes, float into the abyss.