4d ago

Pure Shame

36 comments

Ay yo who took a FAT SHIT in here?
Come check it out, it won't even flush.
SOMEONE BRING THE POOP KNIFE
- Always upvote poop knife
They probably aren’t thinking about it. Classic case of the Spotlight Effect. No one actually cares.
I noticed a few weeks ago that a lot of people were pooping and taking so much goddamn time in the bathroom. Like, what’s going on?
Oh, they were sneaking in to write on my birthday card. It’s even a tradition and it was my birthday party but no, my stupid fucking brain decided the logical explanation was that everyone had diarrhea.
So I guess I’m the reason party guy has to worry.
- If it makes you feel better they probably took a shit and then wrote in your birthday card.
That’s why at the office I go to another floor so the people don’t recognize me or my shoes.
- "Oh hey! You go to this floor too?! So much cleaner."
  
  I work weekends at my job and there are a few departments that don't work weekends. I've walked past people I work with going to and from their bathrooms lol
Well yeah you went to the bathroom?
Pretty sure that’s what it’s for right? It’s called the shitter for a reason
- No shit
  
  Actually, yes shit.
Didn’t even poop, just derped on my phone for a while
- then where did the smell come from!?
  
  Fartin' around. Duh.
- No one thinks you did that
Just tell em you were doing blow
- While you took a shit?
  
  Doing it after, and off of, the shit.
nobody even knows you are there
Either they think you were on your phone or the water was still brown after the first flush.
As someone with crohns disease this one hits hard.
That's what the others are talking/laughing about. They can probably smell it.
Hell, my coworkers brag about it.
Give a shit, don't take a shit
- Well he clearly gives a shit about taking a shit.
So many people poop shy in this thread... It's fine, that's what bathrooms are for.
one if my buddies will loudly ask his gf if she just took a fat shit after she comes out of the bathroom. no matter if its even for 1 minute. its hilarious everytime
- If I ever get a girlfriend I’m going to use this all the time
  
  another good one i learned from a guy i knew in high school, whenever she bends down make a very loud fart sound with your mouth. hilarious 😂
A. Shit
B. Goon
C. Blowjob
D. Phone
- A-D + coke
- I’m either confused or worried about C

36 comments