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Programmer Humor @programming.dev

cm0002 @lemmy.world

4d ago

Infallible Code

57 comments

You don't get it. This was made in GameMaker Studio 1.4, which doesn't support a modulo operator. You know nothing about this specific framework. I have 8 years of experience and hacked governments. There's no reason to update it now, because it runs on a smart fridge at maximum capacity.
- I worked at Blizzard. I worked at Blizzard. I worked at Blizzard.
  
  Yeah, but did your dad work at Blizzard??

You could save about half the code by only listing one boolean value and having the other as a default return at the bottom.
Sometimes my genius is almost frightening.
- This noob even forgot zero
  
  That and all negative values
- But this way your buddy in QA can build extra test cases and pay you back when he wins an award for most test cases created or some other corporate nonsense.
- If small numbers are much more frequent, it's better to return early. Really, you should gather statistics about the numbers the function is called with, and put the most frequent ones at the top.

After working at blizzard for 51 years, I finally found an elegant solution by using the power of recursion

private bool IsEven(int number){ if (number > 1) return IsEven(number - 2); if (number == 0) return true; if (number == 1) return false; }
- assert IsEven(-2);
  
  Now see, you need the other method. IsNegativeEven()
- I removed the tail recursion for you:
  
  private book IsEven(int number) { if(number > 1) return IsEven(number - 2) == true; if(number == 0) return true; if(number == 2) return false; }
  
  What'd be the result for IsEven(1)?
  
  I didn't get this.
  Why return book? Does that have some Blizzard reference?
  And why would number == 2 ⇒ return false? This is a function for getting true when the number is even, right?

At least this madness is isolated to this function. It can easily be fixed.
Pirate’s code is just cluttered with magic numbers everywhere. Hard coded numbers that are referring to a big ”story array”, or characters. It’s just a giant web of complexity. The only fix is to start from scratch.
- It's simple. The only problem is that your code sucks!

This isn’t his actual code, right? Like this specific code pictured here? I’m aware of the “drama” surrounding him currently.
- Nah.
  Someone added him to an existing meme.
  But, if this was his code he would defend it and condescendingly tell you that he is correct, you are not knowledgeable enough to understand and let you know he worked at Blizzard for seven years.
  
  Did you know that he worked for Blizzard for seven years? Not only that, but he was Blizzard's first second-generation employee. He grew up in Blizzard. An extreme accomplishment to be certain. Thank you based and blizzpilled Pirate Software.
  I wonder if he was the one stealing the breast milk. After all, I've heard he can be really childish.
  
  Second gen blizzard employee
- this is an old meme about yanderedev

Inaccurate, it should be return 1 and return 0 for the true 20 years at Blizzard quality.

Even plus even equals even.
Odd plus odd equals even.
Only odd plus even makes an odd.
Are there twice as many even numbers as there are odd numbers?
- Even plus even
  Odd plus odd
  Even plus odd
  Odd plus even
  
  Are we working with a non-abelian group? Other wise this would work.

Pah, mathematicians and their generally applicable pure approach to solutions and fancy modulus operations, who needs 'em? Computing is applied and we always work with well-defined finite precision. Granted, writing the boilerplate for all possible 64 bit integers is a bit laborious, but we're programmers! That's what code generation is for.
- If it works it works. You mathematicians just don't understand the pragmatics. What is tech debt?
- Granted, writing the boilerplate for all possible 64 bit integers is a bit laborious,
  I've been trying to figure out roughly how many lines of code that would equal out to but I've run out of fingers.
  
  Ah, common issue. When that happens, you just start using your toes.
- You can generate the code with a simple macro.

Better/fastest approch would be to check the last bit of the int and return the result. Second use modulo.
This? Dev should burn in hell. Who created this?
- Alternatively you can divide by 2, turn it into an int, mtiply it by 2 and check if both numbers are the same.
- Yandere Simulator Dev. Spaghetti code throughout
- or another stupid, but viable way to do it,
  if number = 0:
  return true
  runloop = true
  while runloop:
  if number > 0:
  number -= 2
  else:
  number += 2
  if number = 1:
  return false
  runloop = false
  if number = 2:
  return true
  runloop = false
  still very shitty amature coding, doesn't depend on modulos, or anything that I can think of that some languages might lack an equivelant of.

The fact that this probably doesn't even optimize to a lookup table just gives me pain.

Obligatory: https://codegolf.stackexchange.com/q/275739/88192
- The fuck is that
  
  Okay so basically this is saving bytes on a technicality but also good programming language design (for this specific purpose).
  The first aspect is that since you're scored on bytes, it's not really to your advantage to use a language that uses ascii (or utf-8) for it's tokens, because a large part of it is unprintables like DEL or BELL. So people have designed specially crafted golfing programming languages that use a full 256 possible characters in order to pack as many features as possible in as few bytes as possible.
  The good design part of it is that if you really think about it hard, there's really not that many things you expect a programming language to do. It turns out that 256 total different operands is about in the sweet spot, so each character that's available in the 1-byte code page is mapped to one command, and the languages are also designed to make as many things as possible implicit, both at the cost of readability. Remember, all that matters here is getting the lowest score, not code maintainability or anything else.
  This leads to languages like japt (which is a terse form of JavaScript, I'm pretty sure) or pyth (same for python) or Vyxal (my personal favorite, used to be python based but is now bespoke) that look like this but absolutely own at getting a task out in as few bytes as possible.

I pretty much did this at my first coding job lol I was building an online menu that you flip through with the keys lol
- I did his "optimized" shading trick for a game my friends and I built for a coding project in school.
  Because the project was due in three hours and we realized that we didn't have any menus. So it was a matter of getting anything functional as menus(stage selection, button mapping, main menu.)
  So the game itself capped at 60fps on the potato school computers, but the static menus only got 20fps.

Then again, Duff’s Device works rather similarly.

Definitely a vibe.
- The only way I could see that happening is if enough people poisoned the data to do this

Not to take from all the funny answers ... but
csharp

bool IsEven(int i) => (i & 1) != 1;
(C#)
- Though, obviously I had to come up with some ridiculous solutions:
  csharp
  
  bool IsEven(int i) => ((Func<string, bool>)(s => s[^1] == 48))($"{i:B}");
  This one works without conditionals :)
  csharp
  
  bool IsEven(int i) { try { int _ = (i & 1) / (i & 1); } catch (Exception) { return true; } return false; }
  
  s[^1]
  Ohh wow, I've been learning it casually for years, and I didn't know that existed in C#. I guess I should go back and hit the books some more.

Try coding chess next time
See ya in a few years

Lol the amount of bullying this guy is getting lately. I've seen similar spins and bends that looks somewhat legit, making people believe he suck at coding

Obligatory MOAR!!!!
https://andreasjhkarlsson.github.io/jekyll/update/2023/12/27/4-billion-if-statements.html

57 comments