4mo ago

As a dad, I got Gen Z folks telling me about YouTube drama and seriously I really don't GAF about some mukbang guy

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"So then li'l blorko was like I'll totally glomp that and he was ratioed by woffle's stans when they.."
You bolt awake in the mountains of Carthage. You are not online. It is 217 BC. You are the general Hannibal, and you have changed your mind. The future cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.
- Is this a copypasta or just new greatness?
  
  Copypasta, i’ve seen it many times before
  
  Not always involving Rome. Not always the past. Not always even human when you wake up.
  But for a brief moment I can try to imagine how good that must feel to not have any of this be a concern of mine, because I'm so far removed from it, it cannot affect me.
  Like waking up as a sentient mycelium colony on a distant planet. Who gives a shit about housing prices or what youtube channel is allegedly being treated unfairly when your sole purpose is to slowly expand across the surface of an alien world and you can instead contemplate the quality of nutrients.
  
  Careful, Hobbes. Calvin needs to be home for dinner, soon, so keep it simple.
  
  your sole purpose is to slowly expand across the surface of an alien world and you can instead contemplate the quality of nutrients.
  Zoom out far enough, and that describes humanity, too.
  
  And suddenly you bolt awake in the mountains of Carthage. You are not online. It is 217 BC. You are the general Hannibal, and you have changed your mind. The future cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.
- “So then li’l blorko was like I’ll totally glomp that and he was ratioed by woffle’s stans when they…”
  I have to know: are these words made-up or is the influence of vapid youtube removed ruinin--uh, I mean "evolving English the way linguists think is cool and proper"?
  
  Glomp, ratioed, and stans
  
  Ic hæfde to witan: sind þas word gemæne oððe is þæs unþeawfulle YouTube wifru forþfæreð, ic mean "eorðan Englisc swylce þa leornere witaþ is fægere and riht"?
  
  It's not made up. I sadly understand that sentence.
  
  We can tell see you fail to understand the linguists take on prescriptivism vs descriptivism because your strawman quote uses the word "proper."
- Wait, "glomp" and "ratio" were NOT in the same vernacular. Not by a decade.
- Have you heard of clomper
  
  I do not regret clicking that link!

63 comments