What's a phrase you hear a lot, but disagree with?
One that comes to mind for me: "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger" is not always true. Maybe even only half the time! Are there any phrases you tend to hear and shake your head at?
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"This too shall pass" when faced with a hurdle but a "savor this moment" when something is supposedly good. If only life worked that way, you wouldn't ever be complaining.
I'm with you on "this too shall pass". My family uses this like it's their damn catchphrase and while I'm sure the intentions are good, sometimes I would like validation when I complain about my life being a shit show, not just an idle 'this too shall pass'. Might as well have just shrugged and walked away.
What would you like to hear in those moments instead of "this shall pass"? I find myself always in trouble when something like that happens: I want to be there for someone but it's not easy and I feel awkward
I think if I come at you with the express purpose of venting, then just some validation is really all I'm looking for, personally. A "that sounds hard" or "dang, dealing with X sounds rough". Things like that make me feel like you're actually listening and like I'm okay to feel so frazzled about whatever is happening.
Another approach that I think is good is asking whether or not whoever is talking to you wants validation, or solutions. I'm guilty of always offering solutions when people want to just vent and be heard, so that's always a good stop gap.
But I absolutely understand how awkward it can be trying to be there for someone and, of course, your results may vary. Still, communication gets us everywhere!