Gary larson rule

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This and that article about the 16 year old that got arrested for cutting down a historic tree makes me wonder if there's a way to uncut down a tree. Like using grafting and some kind of tree steroid
- It's a bit like reattaching a penis. All the tubes are very particular in what they were connected to, so even if you graft it back on you cant direct all of them to reconnect the right way
  
  Just get out that extra big domino cutter and a little wood glue. /s
  
  and even if you do, the tree works by not having ANY air in them so as soon as there's even the slightest amount of it, the tube wont work anymore
  
  Well, I've got a brake bleeder kit from 1975 in my garage. That gets the air out pretty well, so we just need an extra tube, a wrench, and someone to squeeze the tree hard enough to mush the air out.
- The closest thing to what you're talking about is grafting, but that's a specific thing that only works on certain species and I don't think can "glue" two entire halves of a tree back together, maybe just a branch at the most if you're very careful and lucky
  It's why if you plant a seed from a random apple from the supermarket, you're very probably not going to get a tree that produces that apple. Most commerical fruit trees (including ones from your local garden centre) tend to have a bottom half that's hardy and resistant, and then a top half which was "glued" on that actually provides the fruit you want. The bottom half controls the genetic material in the seed, but the top half controls what the fruit will look like.
  On the other hand, you can totally glue a snapped cactus back together, provided it hasn't been too long and the two halves aren't too damaged.
  
  The bottom half controls the genetic material in the seed, but the top half controls what the fruit will look like.
  Yeah, that part isn't true. The top half has the sexual organs, and controls both the fruit and the genetic content of the seed. The seed of that tree will be a genetic descendent of the top half, not the bottom half.
  The problem is, as the other commenter stated, that the offspring of the tree are not likely to share the specific combination of genetic code that makes the exact apple we are looking for. If you want that exact apple, you need a clone of the original tree, not a descendant of that tree.
  
  Well the other bit about apple trees is that they exhibit extreme heterozygosity which means they need the genes of two trees to be combined to make viable seeds, and the genes of their offspring are chosen randomly.
  So they're like people, the kids might exhibit traits of both parents, but they're not clones. Typically if you plant apple seeds, if they are fertile and sprout, the offspring will make apples that are different from both parents. In most cases, these apples aren't desirable, as there are only a few dozen apple varieties on the market against untold millions of possibilities.
- I mean, for most healthy trees, if you don't put an herbicide on the stump, they'll sprout new growth from the cut.
  
  That depends on the species….
  
  Doesn't happen with coniferous species.
  
  Our neighbors cut down all the trees on their side of the property line, but its been about 2 years now and we've got our privacy back because all the stumps sprouted.
- There is a thing called Coppicing or National Trust Link where the stump shoots off and grows new trunks from there. Its not exactly the same and some trees are better suited for it than others.

21 comments