Can someone explain me what actually is going on about the politics drama and public perception of lemmy?

It all comes back to the definition of "privacy" and whether it is reasonable to expect that information, once posted to a publicly accessible forum, can be considered "private".

Is it even reasonable to expect information that isn't transmitted via some method which features end-to-end encryption to remain private?

Maybe I'm just old-school, but I've lived my life by the philosophy: "if it is private, don't post it" Frankly, this should be the first thing we teach kids about the internet, IMHO.