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Unfortunately, I think this is because pretty much every endeavour in life, if you have (severe) ADHD, feels like that. At that point it doesn't really make a difference.
I have severe ADHD and exsisting is a pain. (I'm not suicidal, it's just painful to do/achieve anything at all)
It's hard to be constantly in improvise-mode. Really, that's how it feels to me at least. As if everything consists of just trying to hold it together somehow.
That's how a lot of ADHD folks experience it. And it's really not that surprising when you learn what the ADHD does to your brain.