If that's what you were hoping for you should join Nostr, there they don't have defederation.
Here though we do, and we use it because that's the whole point of it, to block servers that are harmful or push unsavory content. Those who block servers are not opinionated snowflakes who have invalid opinions either.
Look the thing is that the user freedom aspect of the fediverse is not that you're in full control of your account, or that you're able to have unrestricted access to federation, it's that there's more than one place to sign up at. It's not like Reddit where when you get banned it's game over unless you want to spend time messing with Tor and setting up brand new emails to make a new account.
There are other servers where you can sign up to if your current server bans you or defederates the instance where your communities are on.
The thing is the federation aspect is grossly misunderstood and was misrepresented in the beginning to get people to join. It is not an open and unrestricted Network, that means that there are instances that will not be up to the standards of others, for those instances they get defederated.
If you still want to interact with them you need an account on them that's just the way it is and the way it always has been, and it isn't going to change anytime soon.
The sooner you make peace with that the better your time will be here, and if you can't make peace with it or you hate it I would suggest moving to a more open protocol like Nostr, and getting situated there.
These open protocols do have their own drawbacks, though if having one account and never having to worry about defederation is so important you I would definitely suggest looking into that, fediverse and ActivityPub might just not be for you.