5mo ago

This post is the ”_____”

You're viewing a single thread.

59 comments

I’m pretty sure that everyone likes boobs, and nuts are just not awesome in any way. If someone’s using nuts as a superlative thing, their priorities are definitely askew.
- Hard disagree. Nuts are awesome. They're soft, and they're fun to play with, and they're also a fantastic emergency stop button in a fight
  
  Um, are they supposed to be soft? I might need to see my doctor.
  
  The testes themselves aren't soft ime, but if we're talking about the overall (scrotum + testes), then I would say it's pretty soft.
  Though I'm going to take this moment to soapbox about the importance of regular testicular self examinations: https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/testicular-cancer/how-to-check
  The key thing is checking regularly enough that you know what's normal for you, and thus can see a doctor if there are any unexpected changes in shape or texture. (Apologies for lecturing in reply to what was probably a joke)
  
  My doctor has been extolling this (correct) perspective lately and you are excellent for supporting it.
  But because the original post was a joke, I have to share: I've never had a professional testicular examination before. I'm in my late thirties now and recently changed doctors due to moving. My new doctor, the first time I saw her, offered diagnostic testicular palpation. I declined, as I had no cause for concern, then when I got home told my wife how surprised I was at the suggestion. (Not offended or anything, just caught off guard.)
  My wife, whom you might have guessed is a woman, was not sympathetic to my surprise, as she'd had genital inspections throughout her life.
  I normally try to make the last line of a post like this pithy and humorous, but three other conversations I have going on in the background have robbed me of any joy as I typed this (if you knew me you probably would observe the change in tone between paragraphs), so I will merely present this as factual.
  
  Late thirties?
  Suprised by a doctor offering to fondle your balls?
  ... Might not be long before they insist on calling Doctor Proctor in for a... mildly invasive exam.
  
  So I've heard, courtesy of Bill Engvall.
  
  You can also grab twist em upside down and squeeze them into a wee little fly face to thrill all your future partners.
  
  Bop em! Twist em! Pull em!
  I didn't like your comment and I didn't like posting this response, but commenting this seemed necessary.
  
  At least your reply gave this one person a good chuckle, so you have that going for it lol
- Dude that's nuts
- That's such a straight male thing to say
  
  My lesbian friends would disagree.
- I agree, and moreover, no one is allergic to boobs, but people are dying from nuts allergies!
- They look like a mountain range covered in cheap shampoo and burnt trees.
- That's nuts, my friend.
- Ok but that scrote skin is definitely pretty great.

59 comments