5D Chess with Multiverse Time Travel

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Is this viral marketing? 'Cause if it is, it's kinda working.
- Dude I wish. Do you know how many of my posts have been reported for 'viral' or 'guerilla marketing'? As if there's someone out here paying my fat gay ass to post a random meme about fuckin Dennys. I genuinely got a screenshot of a report saying as much about a post of mine yesterday.
  I would gladly shill out, you fuckin kidding me? Daddy desperately needs new clothes. The last clothes that I bought that weren't underwear or socks was a pair of pants 5 years ago.
  
  Any tips on not having to buy new socks every 3 months? God damn socks develop holes far too quickly.
  
  When you buy socks, buy a lot of socks. Should last you longer than a smaller number of pairs of socks.
  
  This. Socks don't "expire" in a few years if you're storing them in your house or a closet. You can save them new for later and now you have new socks.
  
  Check your shoes, get an insert if you can to help with your back. Should also save on socks as a side!
  
  I for one, greatly enjoy your posts
  
  Chill, I just sent your check today. Thanks for hyping the latest Kia Sorento. Boss upstairs says you da best shiller he's ever known.
  
  I still have a pair of undies from Mervyns, which closed 15 years ago.
  
  Bruh send suggestions for where you buy your clothes. Clothes that lasted 5 fucking years? GIMME!
  
  Uh, blue collar clothes. Shit ain't cheap though. Duluth Trading, Carhartt, 5.11, etc...
  Duluth I know has stretchy denim. Meant for comfort but it helps with minor weight changes.
  
  Become (more?) familiar with the needle and thread. Things can last a long time when they need to.
  
  Walmart. I'm just careful with my clothes, use cold water and gentle cycles
  
  To make your clothes last longer:
  Buy natural fibers instead of polyester, they take heating and bending a lot better than plastic
  Wash cold and without bleach unless otherwise necessary, both cause more wear on the clothes. Fabric softeners are also not great and will make your clothing less absorbent, which is miserable when you’re sweaty
  Dry in a dryer minimally if you can avoid it, they’re very rough on clothes. And no dryer sheets, that’s just coating your fabrics in oils
  Inspect and repair small tears before they become big tears. Patch big tears before it falls apart
  You don’t have to do everything on the list to get good returns on longevity, I always use a dryer have a few 20ish year old shirts that are just now coming to the end of their lifespan from being worn to death.
  
  Damn dude, when one of the best memers of our time is hangin’ on by threads. You should get paid for your Car Talk with Martok series. Tell the Founders you need a raise.
  
  I bought a new pair of jeans recently, because the old ones were nearing blowout territory and I needed to go out to a restaurant for dinner. I feel unreasonably ostentatious for briefly owning two pairs of pants.

35 comments