1y ago

Choose wisely!

(shamelessly stolen from an imgur dump)

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426 comments

8 and 9.
I figure I can either make bank lending the anthropologists/archeologists a hand with an extinct language, or at least have a bunch of fun bringing it back to life as a personal hobby.
And really? No one's picking nine? Have any of you seen Albert Einstein's calves? He biked regularly. If it turns out I can outrun him now, that won't always be the case as my sedentary ass ages.
No matter how crap my skeleton becomes, I'm giving myself an automatic default level of movement that isn't all that shabby
- Albert Einstein is dead. You couldn't run at all.
  
  steal corpse of Albert Einstein
  hook it up to exoskeleton
  make it run E=mc² miles per hour
  take the pill
  Problem?
  
  make it run E=mc² miles per hour
  You just converted the energy of Einstein's corpse to mass. It increases in weight by a billionth of a gram or so and you're now paraplegic.
  Also, you failed high school physics.
  /sorry
  
  Or they just converted the mass to energy and can run at relativistic speeds. Which sounds cool until you understand that the equations involved in that would include things like "probability of fission" and "blast radius".
  
  Pretty sure that was intended as troll physics.
  
  This doubles as a sick burn if it wasn't intended as troll physics
  
  You've got it all backwards. Einstein's corpse is now energy and fast AF.
- Tbf, it says you can run as fast as Einstein, but it doesn't say you'll have the same endurance
- Probably because you can just take teleportation instead
  
  Bedridden, trying not to attract the attention of the government as I slowly teleport my 99yr old fail body a couple inches at a time towards the bathroom instead of being able to get up and jog.

426 comments